Beginning's End
by Kitsukikun
Summary: He felt as though his life were over when he left her, with tears in her bright green eyes. But every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end. And sometimes you'll discover that your new beginning has been right beside you all along. Graduate School AU NaruSasuNaru
1. Chapter 1

**Standard Disclaimer: **I do not own the characters of Naruto, nor do I make any money from playing with them. Stock photo from

**Summary:** He felt as though his life were over when he left her, with tears in her bright green eyes. But every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end. And sometimes you'll find out that your new beginning has been right beside you all along. Graduate School AU NaruSasuNaru

**Warnings: **Adult themes; Adult language; Drug and alcohol use; Promiscuity; Non-detailed sex scenes (m/m, possibly m/f and m/m/f) not enough to warrant NC-17, but explicit innuendo.

So without further ado:

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter One <strong>

Uchiha Sasuke was in a club.

The strobe lights flickered alternately blue and red, briefly illuminating nameless faces shrouded in the haze of alcohol and drugs. The music thrummed, echoing somewhere _inside_ Sasuke's eardrums, creating a space in which the confines of ones own self was lost to the greater mass of disambiguated hands and gyrating bodies—bodies in various states of undress.

To be perfectly clear, Uchiha Sasuke was in a _sex _club—that kind of secret, illegal, kinky sex club that you're about ninety percent sure only exists in books and movies. Yet here Sasuke was, mixed in with the blur of anonymous bodies, and it certainly wasn't the first time. If Sasuke were thinking about anything other than those lips and those _teeth_ against his neck and the pair of calloused hands that was busy unfastening his belt, he might have assured you it wouldn't be the last either.

Indeed, twenty-four year old Uchiha Sasuke, prissy rich kid and economics MBA student extraordinaire, had something of a secret life inside the seedy underbelly of this sparkling city. If you can call something you do once a week a "secret life," that is. People often accused Sasuke of having something shoved up his rear. Little did they know that nearly every Saturday, Sasuke _did_ in fact, get something shoved up his rear—or shove something up someone else's, he didn't discriminate.

It would have been relatively simple for a young man as attractive as this one to get laid after a visit to a normal club, but the truth was, Sasuke _liked_ it here. He liked the simplicity of the hook up—no exchanged names, phone numbers nor empty promises. He liked belonging to something perverse, the drugs and the sex, and the thrill of doing something terribly illegal.

He let his eyes scan the room, searching for the telltale flash of red hair that would let him know that _he_ was here. He'd developed a bit of an infatuation with one of his fellow patrons of this establishment of ill repute. Well, he'd developed an infatuation with his _cock_. To be fair, he didn't know much else about him. Tonight would be the night, he decided. He did know he would be playing with fire, that guy liked to push boundaries, even for kinky people, but tonight that was exactly what Sasuke wanted.

His roommate had been mulling over the prospect of finally proposing to his girlfriend after four years. Perhaps it was fitting to consummate this most dangerous affair as those two considered engagement. It was his roommate after all, and that damnable girlfriend of his, who first pushed Sasuke into the wicked embrace of this place four years ago. Sasuke swallowed the lump that was forming in his throat and pushed a pair of big blue eyes out of his memory. Tonight he _definitely_ needed to push his boundaries.

His heart briefly stopped as he caught just a splash of red in the flickering light. He frowned. Just Karin. She grinned at him and yanked her boyfriend toward him by his long, silvery hair. While this place wasn't exactly designed to foster relationships, it did create some sort of a kinky sex community. You went home with people sometimes. Learnt the occasional faces and names of people as freaky and perverted as you. Karin and her boyfriend, Suigestu, formed something of a major hub of the network.

"Hey there pretty boy." Karin purred. "Looking for someone else?" She teased.

Sasuke just smirked dangerously.

"Can we play?" Suigetsu's voice was slippery as his hands snaked around his girlfriend's hips to rest on Sasuke's.

Sasuke shoved his hand into his pocket and procured a condom. He heard a growl behind him.

"Hey now, new kid." Suigetsu chastised the boy. "Play nice or don't play at all."

The Uchiha felt a pair of eyes boring into him from across the room. A triumphant smirk stretched across his face and he snatched the condom out of Karin's hand.

She scowled. "What the hell?"

"I have something different in mind tonight."

Sasuke tilted his head toward an imposing man—tall and muscular—who was eyeing him from one shadowy corner of the club. He pulled away from his group. He felt a hand snagging his jeans.

"Not a good idea, Uchiha." Suigetsu warned.

Sasuke had yet to break eye contact with his dangerous infatuation.

"Seriously, Sasuke," Karen hissed, yanking his chin to hers. "Be careful."

"Don't worry." He gave them a bored expression. "I've got a mean left hook."

He swayed across the club, coyly, allowing countless hands to stray across his body. A delicious mixture of fear and anticipation sparked in his gut, lighting a fire that spread to the very tips of his fingers and toes. It could have been the alcohol.

"I can see why they call you pretty boy." A large hand gently swept Sasuke's bangs away from his eyes.

The Uchiha just smirked.

"I'm waiting to see why they call you a demon. You don't look so dangerous to me." Sasuke lied.

"I have a bit of a split personality." The other man admitted. "If you're lucky, you'll get to meet the bad one."

Sasuke quirked one thin eyebrow with interest. "Your reputation precedes you. Let's hope you don't disappoint."

"Rules?" The other man asked.

"Condoms." Sasuke replied.

"That's it?" He asked, surprise and interest flashing in his lust darkened eyes. "Drugs? Gags? Handcuffs?"

"Don't make me OD." Sasuke commanded flatly. "And I need a safe word."

"Fine, but you'd better not fucking use it."

The man spun Sasuke like a rag doll and shoved him against the wall. He forced a bruising kiss onto Sasuke's lips, passing something into his mouth. Sasuke choked on the burning drink that slid down his throat. He felt it the mixture smouldering in his stomach. A pleasant haze pressed against his eyelids.

"I don't intent to."

* * *

><p>"Do you suppose he's alive?"<p>

Sasuke awoke feeling as though someone had shoved an entire roll of cotton gauze into his mouth. The light chatter echoed inside his head like the toll of church bells.

"I don't know, let me check if his heart is beating."

He felt a warm weight settle in the middle of his back.

"Uzumaki." He growled. "If you don't get off of me right now, it will be _your_ heart that will stop beating."

"IT'S ALIVE!" A voice called triumphantly.

And very loudly, Sasuke would add with a pained grimace. Naruto Uzumaki was not known to be particularly quiet.

Sasuke hissed as he attempted to turn over. His whole body ached.

"Fuck." He cursed under his breath.

The fat gray tabby that had been sleeping behind his knees cursed too.

He glanced down at himself. He could swear the light attacked his eyes with the intensity of thousands of those stabby little cocktail swords and Sasuke quickly replaced the pillow that had been over his head.

"Fuck." He repeated.

He was on the sofa. Still in his clothes, shoes and all. No wonder that idiot had been concerned.

"Are you OK, Sasuke?" A gentler, _quieter _voice asked.

Check that. The idiot _and_ his fucking girlfriend. Great.

Sasuke grunted.

"Aww… does Sasu-chan have a wittle hangover?"

Little did not begin to describe the pain that ricocheted through his every fibre, but he remained silent on the issue, gently flexing his toes – as though that would help his body wake up.

"What time is it?" He grumbled, ignoring his roommate.

"It's about two." The girlfriend replied.

"TWO?"

Sasuke jerked in surprise. He instantly regretted the sudden movement as his muscles and bones groaned in protest.

"Jesus Christ." He muttered.

"IT'S RAINING MEN! HALLELUIA, IT'S RAINING MEN! AMEEEEN!"

"Is that your phone?" Naruto snickered.

Sasuke could hear the delight in his flatmate's voice. He didn't have to look to see the utter bliss reflecting in his big blue eyes.

"Fucking Suigetsu." He cursed.

He made no move to reach for the phone. He figured whoever it was could wait for the room to stop spinning.

Naruto, apparently, had other plans. He snagged the blaring device from the coffee table.

"Um… Sasuke…" He began, hesitation evident in his voice. "Someone called 'Skanky Slut Cunt' is apparently calling you."

"The fuck?" He muttered, blindly groping for the phone from behind his pillow.

"Hello." It was more of a demand than a question.

"IT'S ALIVE!"

Sasuke nearly dropped his phone.

"Fuck! Volume control!" He hissed.

"Hey pretty boy, we're just calling to see if you're OK." A female voice drifted over the line.

Sasuke sighed deeply. Karin and Suigetsu didn't often call to check on him after their nights out. He pressed the backs of his hands to his eyes, trying to capture the fraying details of the end of the previous night.

"I'm OK." He answered after several moments of contemplation. "Feel like shit though."

"You look like shit." Naruto commented.

Sasuke didn't feel like peeling back the pillow to see if he looked as worried as he sounded. He settled for flipping him the middle finger.

"Who was that?" Karin asked, in Sasuke's not-so-humble-opinion, far too chipper for two in the afternoon.

"My roommate."

"Sunshine?"

"I only have one roommate." He answered dryly.

"HI SUNSHINE!" Those two called in unison over the phone.

Sasuke sighed, as the noise ricocheted inside his skull. Quieter friends, he promised himself. _Quieter friends. _He pressed his free hand against his temple and slowly pulled back the pillow.

"My friends say hi." He muttered in the direction of his flatmate.

"Oh hey!" He heard an excited Suigetsu call. "We're friends now!"

"These people I hate that I sometimes hang out with say hi." Sasuke corrected without a second's hesitation.

He ignored the protests drifting through the airwaves.

"Did they just call me sunshine?" Naruto asked, cocking his head to the side like a confused little puppy.

"They like to make up nicknames for people." Sasuke responded with a sigh. "You can't protest. It only encourages them."

"Do you have a nickname?"

Sasuke ignored him.

More importantly: "Sui, why did you name yourself 'Skanky Slut Cunt' in my phone?"

"Oh shit," the man giggled, "this is Karin's phone."

"SUIGETSU! I SWEAR I'M GOING TO KICK YOUR FUCKING ASS!"

Sasuke snorted and let his phone rest on his chest until the cursing and slapping sounds subsided. He toed off his shoes and let them fall to the floor with a thunk.

"Hey, so that guy last night, his name's Juugo, but the way, is pretty OK." Karin suddenly interrupted her own string of curses. "You were kind of out of it after a while, and he asked us how to get you home. He looked pretty worried."

"Demon, my ass." Suigetsu muttered.

"I appreciate you bringing me home." Sasuke mumbled, a bit embarrassed.

"No problem. I'm surprised you remember."

Sasuke shrugged, aware that the gesture was lost over the phone.

"OK pretty boy, you get your beauty sleep."

Sasuke grunted.

"See you next week?"

Sasuke grunted again, hanging up and tossing his phone to the other end of the couch. With great effort he managed to pull himself into a sitting position. His bottom screamed with protest, sending shooting pain all the way up his back. He hissed.

"Rough night?"

It was Naruto's girlfriend, Sakura Haruno. His roommate had mysteriously vanished from the room while he'd been on the phone.

Rough night indeed. Thoughts of lechery drifted through his foggy brain. A rough night he _would_, in fact, care to repeat at his soonest convenience.

"We were actually kind of worried." She added, paying no mind to his silence.

Sasuke sighed. He hated this girl, but he shrugged anyway. Naruto would be pissed if he was _too_ rude to his girlfriend.

"I mean it's not normal for you to pass out on the couch like that."

She was chatting nervously. She fiddled with her hair in the same coy, little-girl way she had done since she was eight years old. His lip curled in disgust.

"I suppose I've had worse." He said flatly.

He didn't look at her, just idly stroked the cat and wondered where the fuck Naruto had gone. His question was answered momentarily, when his sunny roommate emerged from the hallway clutching a large glass of water and a bottle of aspirin.

"Oh fuck, thank you." He muttered, trying not to drink too greedily.

Naruto just grinned at him in that way that always made his heart stop. Sasuke choked, apparently having taken a breath mid-gulp. Lovely.

"Easy there." Naruto teased as he flopped down on the couch next to him.

The movement caused his body to jerk and he hissed at the renewed pain that burned from the base of his spine upwards.

Naruto squinted; worry creasing his brow.

"So Sasuke has secret friends that he hides from the rest of us." Sakura hummed thoughtfully.

Did she honestly think he went out _alone_ every Saturday?

"Forget secret friends…" Naruto mumbled, cocking his head.

Then he grinned, pulling locks of sticky black hair off of Sasuke's neck. "Uchiha Sasuke, is that a _hickey_?!"

Sasuke clapped his hand immediately to his neck.

"Holy shit!" Naruto was laughing with that big, obnoxious laugh of his. "You finally got laid!"

Sasuke snorted. Finally?

Sakura's eyes were wide. "You have a girlfriend?"

She sounded upset and Sasuke sent her an ugly glare. Naruto simply stared at Sasuke's neck, clearly pretending not to notice his girlfriend's infatuation with his best friend.

"Yeah, why didn't you tell us?" Naruto's laugh sounded forced.

Sasuke rolled his eyes. "I don't have a girlfriend."

"But you did get laid." Naruto pressed.

"It's casual."

"How casual?" Naruto was practically bouncing. "Will you see her again?"

Sasuke closed his eyes, snippets of his night flashed behind his eyelids. Strong hands gripped his hips with bruising force. He could feel his breath hitching with every thrust, hazy-eyed pleasure settling low in the base of his stomach. And his wrists… fuck… That guy… Juugo hadn't been kidding about the handcuffs.

He wouldn't have been able to stop the lusty smirk that split his face if he'd tried.

"I certainly hope so."

Sasuke's voice came out in a low husk he didn't anticipate.

"Fucking hell man!" Naruto threw his arms behind his head. "Must have been a hell of a lay."

Sasuke gave an affirmative sort of hum.

"So do I get to meet her?"

Naruto bounced in his seat.

"No." Sasuke stated dryly.

"Why not?"

"It's casual, idiot."

"At least tell me what she looks like." The blond implored.

Sasuke sighed. "I don't know. Tall. Athletic. Red hair." He replied cryptically.

"I didn't know you were into gingers!" Naruto snickered. "She sounds hot!"

Sasuke just shrugged.

"I don't know how you did it." The other boy marvelled, still clearly way too amused by the latest development in his friend's sex life. "Whenever I have too much to drink, there's no way I can… you know… perform."

"It takes practice." Sasuke mumbled absently.

A pair of black eyes widened in panic.

"I can't believe I just said that."

He turned to face his roommate hesitantly. He looked something like a surprised fish.

"Holy Shit Uchiha!" Naruto sputtered after a moment of uncontrollable gaping. "I can't believe you just said that either!"

Sasuke stared blankly at the wall, wondering where talkative Sasuke came from, and wishing he'd go hang himself.

"Well if you two are quite done discussing your conquests," Sakura suddenly snipped, "I need to get going."

"Aww Sakura, I was going to take you out for lunch." Naruto whined, standing up quickly.

"It's after two. I have to study."

"You can study here. We can get take out?"

Sasuke's lip curled as he watched the pathetic idiot fawning over his girlfriend.

"Naruto, I can't concentrate. You know I like to study in the library."

"Can I bring you dinner?"

The conversation was muffled as the two disappeared into Naruto's bedroom.

Sasuke sighed and looked at his cat. She had fallen back asleep, her fat, shaggy underbelly exposed.

"It's hopeless, ne Yugi-chan?" He muttered, poking her soft, supple belly.

She growled tiredly and glared at him with one green eye.

"I'll call you tonight?"

Naruto and Sakura returned to the living room.

"Fine, but I can't talk long."

Sakura fussed with her shoes.

"Goodbye, Naruto. Bye Sasuke." She waved from the doorway.

Sasuke said nothing.

"I love you." Poor idiot sounded really pathetic.

"You too." Sakura gave Naruto a chaste kiss on the cheek. "I'll talk to you tonight."

And with the metallic click of the latch, the two were alone—alone with Sasuke's cat, that was.

Naruto flopped back on the couch, giving the door a wistful stare. Sasuke hesitated, and then placed his hand on Naruto's bicep. The other man looked at him like he'd grown a second head.

"That's the closest thing you're going to get to a hug, idiot."

Naruto's eyes glinted with something disturbing before he launched himself on Sasuke. It was more of a tackle than a hug, but he supposed that was par for the course with Naruto. The cat squawked and fled, leaving claw marks on both of them.

"Idiot. Get off." Sasuke wiggled, trapped beneath the oppressive warmth of his roommate's larger body.

"Oh come on, asshole. I know you're secretly cuddly."

"I'm not cuddling with you, dumbass. You're holding me down so I can't move."

"Same difference." Naruto responded with a winning smile. "Besides, I've seen you snuggle with your kitty. You speak in Japanese and give her kisses."

In horror, Sasuke fought the blush that flashed in his cheeks. He wiggled for a few more moments, then sighed in defeat.

"Are you OK?" He asked after a still moment. He nodded his head toward the door. "You and Sakura? I mean… I'm sorry she…"

Sasuke trailed off, no idea what to say. He'd never been very good at this comforting thing.

Naruto deflated. "She was mad at me all night."

Sasuke raised his eyebrows.

Naruto apparently knew that meant "go on" in Sasuke-speak, so he continued.

"You know how she always goes to her family's house on Fridays?"

Sasuke actually didn't know that, but he nodded anyway.

"Well this week she went out with Ino."

Sasuke raised only one eyebrow this time… sceptically.

"I mean, I don't care if she goes out with her friends. I just felt like she was hiding it from me." Naruto paused. "I tried to tell her that, but she got mad and said I was trying to control her or some bullshit."

"Do you have to know where I am at _every_ moment?" The man squeaked in a crap imitation of his girlfriend.

Back in his normal voice he said. "No, but I just like to know what she's up to. It's not about trust or anything, I just…"

"Give her space." Sasuke wrinkled his brow.

He sighed, not completely understanding why he was trying to help the idiot with this girl.

"She thinks you're smothering her."

Naruto pouted.

"But I love in a smothery sort of way." He protested.

"_I_ know that. Just… let her be for a while."

Naruto chewed on his lip. "You're probably right…"

He trailed off, a distant forlorn look casting a rainy grey into his bright eyes.

"You think I'd be good at relationships… as a psych student…" He mumbled when Sasuke didn't say anything.

The blond rested his chin in his hands on Sasuke's chest. "But you _are_ good at this stuff… figures, you're good at everything."

Sasuke cocked his head in confusion.

"So Mr. 'It's Casual,' how do you seduce a girl?"

Black eyes blinked a couple of times.

"Oh come on, what's your first move?"

Sasuke sighed. Naruto was changing the subject.

He mentally shrugged. He didn't know how to deal with a mopey Naruto anyway.

"I almost never make the first move." He admitted after a moment's thought. "I make them come to me."

Now it was Naruto's turn to look sceptical. "You can't be _that_ good."

Sasuke let a dangerous smirk slide across his lips. "Wanna bet?"

His roommate's eyes sparked playfully. "Give me all you've got."

Sasuke closed his eyes and inhaled. Twice. He let his lids open slowly, lingering momentarily on those baby blues before drifting to his lips and back again. Sasuke caught just the edge of his own lip on his teeth and tilted his head, leaning forward just enough to feel Naruto's breath fanning across his lips. He gave the blond a half-lidded stare, the coyest, most sultry look in his repertoire. His eyes were demanding… daring.

Uchiha Sasuke expected his roommate to punch him playfully and tell him to stop. He maybe even could have foreseen a 'hey, that's pretty good.' Uchiha Sasuke, however, did not expect to feel the quickening of his roommates heart against his, the slight hitch of his breath nor see his pupils dilate. When he licked his lips, Sasuke could almost feel them brush against his own. Naruto swallowed and let his gaze drop to Sasuke's parted lips, and for a fraction of a second, Sasuke swore that he was going to…

"Holy shit, Uchiha!" Naruto jerked backwards. "Quit that!"

Sasuke smirked, feeling bold. "Afraid you'll like it?"

"Yeah, kinda!" The blond looked away, shaking his head. "Jesus Christ, you could charm the pants off a snake with a look like that."

The Uchiha shrugged.

"You… you…" Naruto was still sputtering. "Don't do that! And you need a shower, you totally reek!"

Sasuke sniffed his shirt experimentally. His eyes bugged. He trudged to his room listening to his flatmate muttering something about febrezing the couch.

When the door to Sasuke's bedroom shut with an echoing click, Naruto stilled. He sat back on the sofa staring blankly at the wall. He placed a shaky hand to his heart, which was still beating erratically.

He had literally been millimetres from kissing his best friend.

What the fuck?

And Sasuke… Sasuke's daring black eyes stared back at him from the blank wall ahead, like he was playing chicken or something. Naruto sighed, allowing his head to clunk against the plaster behind him.

Games aside, Sasuke would have punched him in the nose!

He snorted and stood, forcefully pushing any lingering anxiety out of his mind. He made a mental note not to challenge Sasuke to any more stupidity and skipped to his room without giving that moment a second thought.

On the other side of the wall, Uchiha Sasuke was also staring blankly ahead. Something unfamiliar was bubbling inside of him that felt strangely like hope.

There was no mistaking those signs of arousal, however brief and unexpected.

He scratched his cat behind her ear and hummed. "Maybe it's not so hopeless after all, Yugi-chan."

* * *

><p><strong>Author's notes mock two: <strong>Let me know what you think of the revision? Seriously, I listen :) I'm trying to get better, so be as bitterly cruel as you like.


	2. Chapter 2

**Standard Disclaimer: **I do not own the characters of Naruto, nor do I make any money from playing with them.

**Summary:** He felt as though his life were over when he left her, with tears in her bright green eyes. But every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end. And sometimes you'll find out that your new beginning has been right beside you all along. Graduate School AU NaruSasuNaru

**Warnings: **Adult themes; Adult language; Drug and alcohol use; Promiscuity; Non-detailed sex scenes (m/m, possibly m/f and m/m/f) not enough to warrant NC-17, but explicit innuendo.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter Two <strong>(revised)

"And in this model, a one billion Euro increase of G at C1 = 0.9 yields an additional income of ten billion Euros."

Sasuke's voice reverberated in the small stuffy classroom as he squeaked out an equation on the dry erase board. He was melting. It may have been snowing outside, but why on earth they cranked up the radiators to max power in the classrooms was beyond Sasuke's genius mind. They could have held a luau in here. No wonder the environment was doomed.

"Tatsuki, I admire your tonsils, but if you're bored taking this class, imagine how boring it is to teach it." He quipped to a student in the middle of the room.

The class chuckled as the boy snapped his mouth shut, blushing and giving the class a sunny smile.

"As I was saying, a decrease of T to the same extent only equals an increase of nine billion Euros. What does this mean?"

He turned to face the class.

"The conservatives are wrong?" The boy with the bright smile answered.

The class laughed again.

Sasuke fought both the urges to roll his eyes and to smirk. This kid always reminded him of someone…

"Assuming optimal market conditions, yes, the conservatives are wrong. That is a big assumption, by the way." He noted. "In the real economy there are complicating factors. If it were that simple, I wouldn't have a job."

The class was still tittering behind him. Sasuke glanced at the clock above his head. Class was almost done. Thank heaven.

"Furthermore, the increase in government expenditure, G, affects aggregate income whereas decreased taxes only affects disposable income and household consumption."

Sasuke put the cap back on his marker and tossed it into his bag.

"Saving annihilates a part 1 – C1. Remember that, it will be on your midterm."

There was a flurry of activity as the class scribbled down the equations on the whiteboard.

"We're done for today. Do the homework that's indicated in your syllabus, and we'll begin to talk about financial markets next week."

Sasuke retrieved his USB key from the classroom computer and logged out of his user. As the class filed noisily out of the room, he caught a shock of blond hair waiting for him in the hallway. It actually took effort to keep his lips pinched into a frown.

"Professor Uchiha?"

Sasuke raised his head.

"It's the second quarter, Tatsuki. Isn't it a little late to start showing respect?"

He quirked one eyebrow as the kid on the other side of the desk rubbed his hand through his messy chocolate hair. A personality trait that was annoyingly familiar.

"Yeah, probably." He grinned. "I just want to start this quarter out on the right foot. I was wondering if I could swing by your office hours on Monday."

Sasuke gave him a reassuring nod, slinging his leather messenger bag over his shoulder.

"I will be there. See you Monday?"

"Sure thing, Professor!"

Tatsuki gave him a mock salute before disappearing down the hall.

"Professor?"

It wasn't fair that one word from that idiot's baritone voice could send his heart skittering into overdrive.

Naruto was grinning from the doorway, his eyebrows arched in amusement. Sasuke just shrugged.

"I wish I could get my students to call me 'Professor.'" He muttered absently.

Sasuke snorted.

"You must be a good teacher, though. My TA never made the class laugh in a stupid Intro to Macro class."

As Naruto poked the class schedule hanging next to the door for emphasis, Sasuke felt a small blush settling over his cheeks. Luckily, his flatmate was still looking at the schedule. He inhaled deeply and pushed past the other man.

"So are you ready to hit the pool?"

Naruto skipped to keep up with him.

"I brought your stuff!" He sang.

Sasuke worked out every evening after classes, and his roommate often tagged along. He suspected that Naruto only pushed swimming because it was the one and only thing in which he was clearly better than Sasuke. He'd been a swimmer in undergrad, and the idiot still liked to show off.

"Yeah, fine. We can swim today."

The Uchiha liked to mix up his workouts anyway. It had absolutely nothing to do with the university swim team Speedo Naruto still liked to wear.

Well, while he was on the topic: "Did you bring your green panties?"

"They are _not_ panties, and they make me go faster, asshole." Naruto defended.

Sasuke hummed doubtfully.

"We'll see who's humming when I'm swimming laps around you!"

Sasuke just ignored him and pushed through the door into the chilled winter's air.

* * *

><p>Swimmers, Sasuke decided, were sadists. Masochists. Whatever. And Sasuke had a fairly personal understanding of the definition of sadomasochism. Everyone knows that swimming works all of the body's muscles, but what Sasuke discovered that evening was that real swimmers know how to isolate each muscle and torture it individually.<p>

He clutched his abs in the water and took a deep breath.

No wonder that idiot had such a nice body. Jesus Christ. Swimming was excruciating!

"Race me! Race me! Sasuke-kun, pleeeease?"

The Uchiha glared at his roommate.

"Fuck off."

"Oh, come on! Are you scared you're going to lose?" He challenged, slinging the water off of his bangs.

Dear gods, Naruto was beautiful with water clinging to his hair like that, blue eyes reflecting the ripples of the water. Sasuke scowled and looked away.

"I have no desire to humiliate myself so that you can impress that blonde lifeguard over there."

"Oh, you're no fun!" The idiot pouted, lifting himself from the water. "I'm going to go play on the diving boards. You wanna come?" He asked hopefully.

"You go ahead."

"Watch me, OK?"

The Uchiha only shrugged.

Naruto stuck out his tongue and skipped like a child to the deep end.

Sasuke wondered, not for the first time, how he had the stamina to play around after nearly two hours of hard swimming. He gave his stomach an experimental poke, wondering whom he could convince to give him an ab massage. It almost hurt to breathe.

He pushed off the wall, doing a gentle cool down backstroke almost lazily across the pool. He didn't particularly want to see Naruto flirting with that lifeguard.

He let the water wash over his goggles, staring at the ripples in the ceiling. Still, today hadn't been a total loss… Naruto had practically humped him underwater. That was certainly a first.

Out of habit, Sasuke pursed his lips to hide his smirk.

His decision to work on core muscle strength, which in retrospect may have been a mistake, prompted Naruto to declare the day a butterfly day and grab an armful of pool equipment. Apparently, the butterfly's kick, in addition to being horribly painful, had some sort of hip rhythm, and Sasuke, _apparently_, sucked some serious balls at it. After about fifteen minutes of nearly drowning himself in the shallow end, Naruto decided to take things into his own hands.

"It's like this, Sasuke." The other boy huffed, tearing his goggles off.

He felt Naruto's body radiating heat as he stood behind him, despite the chill of the pool.

"Just put your hands like this."

He slid his hands up Sasuke's arms, capturing his wrists and putting them in a diving position above his head.

Sasuke inhaled sharply, thankful for the wash of cold water against his lower body. Not that it would help for long.

"The butterfly uses a two part dolphin kick." He explained. "It has a big kick and a little kick. The big one you can use to pop your head out of the water when you need to breathe. At the end of the big kick, your back will arch, like so…"

Naruto ran one hand down Sasuke's spine and he shivered involuntarily. Each of his vertebrae rolled, responding individually to the touch.

"Perfect." He hummed into the crown of his skull.

Was it just Sasuke's imagination, or had his flatmate's voice dropped about half an octave?

"It's really a full body kick, so it starts from the top of your spine and works its way down."

Naruto fitted his body behind Sasuke's and it was all he could do not to go completely rigid.

"Relax, asshole. I'm just going to help you feel the rhythm."

So maybe his attempt not to stiffen like a freaking corpse was a failure. Sasuke really wanted to say something, but he was afraid his voice would come out in a squeak.

"It's like this: one, _two_, one _two_…"

And the idiot was literally humping him. Seriously, Naruto, what the fuck? Beneath the water, he had one hand on his chest and another on his belly, fingers splayed, trapping them together.

So Sasuke gave up, closed his eyes and decided to enjoy it – whilst trying not to pop a boner. It was a lot like dancing actually, except his hips shifted to the natural rhythm of the water rather than to whatever crap music the DJ decided to put on that night.

"Perfect!" Naruto beamed, squeezing him from behind and spinning him in circles.

Sasuke pushed away from him abruptly, turning away to hide his half-staff little friend.

"Thanks, idiot. Now in the future, could you please refrain from humping me in public? I think you gave that lifeguard an aneurism."

Naruto had sputtered and gave the pretty blonde lifeguard an embarrassed little wave. Maybe it hadn't helped his case with Naruto much, but at least embarrassing the idiot had soothed his ego a little bit.

Sasuke snorted under water at the memory. The bubbles rose to the surface, briefly obscuring his vision. He was just about to push off the wall when he felt something snake around his waist and pull him deeper underwater. On impulse, he gasped, and he emerged from the water coughing and choking and glaring metaphysical daggers at whoever had pulled him under.

The vision that met him was incredibly pale. He wore a purple swimming cap, purple goggles, and a teeny-weeny purple Speedo that even put Naruto's to shame. There was only one man alive who was so obsessed with purple.

"Suigetsu?" Sasuke asked incredulously, pulling his goggles down to float around his chin.

"Hey pretty boy! I didn't know you liked to swim."

"I don't." Sasuke muttered. "What are you doing here?"

"Oh, I love to swim."

Suigetsu demonstrated this love by doing a little flip under water.

"I could probably swim in the Olympics, but I'd never pass a drug screen."

Sasuke snorted and pulled himself out of the pool to sit with his feet in the water.

"Sasuke!" Karin squeaked happily, depositing herself on his lap.

She was wearing a strange, long-sleeved swimsuit that Sasuke suspected was actually a leotard.

"You go to school here?" Sasuke asked, his eyes lingering on the university logo that had been painted on the bottom of the pool.

"Yeah, Sui is getting his bachelors in social work and I'm in med school."

Sasuke's eyebrows shot toward his hairline.

"You're in _medical school_?"

"Oh come on pretty boy," Karin punched him in the bicep, "intelligence and a healthy appreciation for the human phallus are not mutually exclusive."

She leaned closer to whisper in his ear.

"You should know." She drawled.

Suigetsu arched gracefully out of the water, wiggling as close to Sasuke as physically possible.

"So what brings you here?" He asked, nudging him in the ribs. "If you're so anti-swimming.

Sasuke glared out of the corner of his eyes.

"My roommate likes to come." He muttered.

"So, _that_ is sunshine?" Karin asked, her amber eyes glued to the diving board. "Jesus, Sasuke, no wonder you're so fixated on him."

"I am not fixated!"

Naruto chose that moment to do an impressive back flip.

"Want to bring him home, love?" Sui asked his girlfriend, following the blond's strong strokes to the edge of the pool.

"You are _not_ taking him home!"

"So not fixated." Suigetsu quipped.

"He has a girlfriend, for gods sake!" Sasuke defended, sounding significantly more bitter than he intended.

"I always suspected you'd be possessive of someone you really loved." Karin noted.

"I'm not possessive! And I don't…"

"Everyone wants to be loved, Sasuke." Suigetsu interrupted, still following the blond swimmer with his eyes. "And if fucked up people, like me and Karin, found love…"

Karin reached across Sasuke's lap and gave her boyfriend a loud smooch on his cheek.

"Just tell him someday." Karin ordered.

"What are you…"

Sasuke didn't even know why he was protesting anymore.

"Tell him how you feel, preferably _before_ he marries some pretty bitch." She gave Sasuke a pointed look. "You'll feel better, even if it doesn't go well."

"And just fucking him doesn't count." Suigetsu noted.

"What part of 'girlfriend' did you misunderstand" Sasuke responded bitterly.

"I have a girlfriend, and I have sex with men." Suigetsu defended, like it was the most normal thing in the world.

Sasuke rolled his eyes.

"I'm pretty sure he'd be traumatised."

"Only a real moron would be traumatised by a love confession from you, beautiful." Karin pushed the lump of wet hair away from Sasuke's forehead.

Sasuke didn't mention that Naruto was a pretty big moron.

"But now, onto more important topics," she chirped, "are you coming to the club this Saturday? Everyone's all abuzz about you and Juugo!"

Sasuke didn't notice the bright blue eyes watching him from across the pool. A beautiful young woman was sitting on Sasuke in an entirely inappropriate way, and Sasuke didn't push her away. On the contrary, he looked comfortable with her.

Tall, ginger and athletic… Naruto hummed appreciatively. Sasuke did well. She did have an impressive figure, even with that weird ass bathing suit.

Naruto did a flip off the diving board, plunging deep into the water.

It stung to see Sasuke so comfortable with someone, but perhaps it was the boy sitting next to them that really broke Naruto's heart.

He'd seen this boy before, admired him actually. He'd never seen such a talented swimmer up close. He was fair skinned with blond hair so pale it was almost silver.

Naruto swam to the edge of the pool. He could feel the gaze of Sasuke and his friends boring into him as he climbed the ladder to the board. He gave them a hesitant peek over his shoulder as he stood with only his toes on the edge of the board. They'd gone back to talking in their own little world, Sasuke swatting at the boy, who was trying to pinch his cheeks.

The scene was so familiar it actually _hurt_. Except instead of those two, it would have been Sakura trying to seduce Sasuke, and himself poking Sasuke in the side. Sometime _before_ he and Sakura started dating – sometime _before_ everything changed.

It seemed there was a gulf between him and Sasuke, and for the first time he felt its weight. He'd put so much emotional effort into trying to sustain his relationship with Sakura, somewhere along the way he had just let Sasuke slip away silently into the night.

Naruto let himself fall into the water one last time. He swam to the edge of the pool, poking his head out just as Sasuke leaned forward to kiss the girl, but pulled away when she responded. She slapped him, and the boy beside them burst out into echoing guffaws of obnoxious laughter.

No, Naruto was wrong. The three of them had _never_ been so close.

Naruto closed his eyes, allowing the scene to burn in his stomach. He wanted to be sick. Having completely lost the playful mood for diving, Naruto put on his happiest face and prepared to meet Sasuke's new most important people.

But Sasuke beat him to it. He pushed the pretty girl into the other guys lap and met him halfway to the diving boards.

"See you Saturday!" The girl chirped.

Sasuke waved behind him without looking.

"Let's go moron. I'm cold."

Sasuke pulled Naruto toward the locker room by his wrist.

"Who are they?" Naruto asked, trying to be cheerful.

"You won't like them."

Naruto looked over his shoulder. They waved happily. The boy gave him a bright snaggletoothed grin. He waved hesitantly and, with a heavy heart, let Sasuke pull him toward the showers.

* * *

><p>Naruto stood silently in the hallway, leaning casually against the wall, his eyebrows pinched together in concentration. It was one of those lazy Sunday afternoons that he spent holed up in his flat with his favourite flatmate. But about that flatmate in question...<p>

Sasuke was different. He sat with his legs folded beneath him as he poured through article after article with his highlighter and note cards. Working on his thesis no doubt. While this dedication to his studies was nothing new, his posture was different – relaxed – and the worry lines between his eyes were slowly fading.

Naruto had been noticing the subtle changes in Sasuke's behaviour for some time. Though ever the lugubrious type, lately he seemed to be intent on finding that inner comity he'd been searching for since age eight. And Naruto was just beginning to realise that it probably had nothing to do with his influence, and everything to do with those two friends they'd run into at the pool.

None of his own friends, save Sakura, really much cared for his stuffy Uchiha, and Naruto had always felt that he had a precious and well-kept secret. Uchiha Sasuke, despite his prickly exterior, was a damn good friend – fiercely loyal and dependable. Selfish as it was, he didn't want to share him with anyone else. Sasuke was special. Their _friendship_ was special.

After about the fiftieth time Sasuke swept his silky black bangs away from his face, just to have them immediately fall back into his eyes, he let out an annoyed huff. He plucked the bright pink hair clip Sakura had left on the coffee table the day before, inspected it suspiciously, then clipped his hair away from his eyes.

Naruto couldn't capture the snort of laughter that sneaked through his nose.

Sasuke peered over his shoulder and threw Naruto an easy smile.

Did he smile for his other friends?

"Manly. I'm aware."

"I don't know, S'uke, pink is a good colour on you."

"If you're into cyber-punk." Sasuke muttered.

Naruto crossed the room and plopped himself onto the coffee table, effectively obscuring most of the articles thereon.

Sasuke rolled his eyes.

"Jesus. You're worse than your cat."

There was indeed a cat occupying a good fifty percent of the coffee table, but it wasn't the normal fat, fluffy blue tabby that claimed Sasuke as her own. This cat was far fatter and fluffier and distinctly _orange_. He lay on his back, his white paws outstretched in order to occupy as much, or slightly more, space as was physically possible. Incidentally, a twenty-pound cat can command a good deal of space.

"Oh, leave Kyu-Kyu alone." Naruto pouted.

Naruto had to admit, that when they had found these two pocket-sized fuzz balls mewing helplessly in the gutter, he had not expected them to grow into two massive Maine Coons, with hair sticking out from literally every direction. Sasuke vacuumed nearly every day.

Naruto pulled the clip out of Sasuke's hair, watching his black locks cascade across his forehead.

"Emo haircut." Naruto commented. "Sexy but annoying?"

He grinned and reclipped those errant bangs, turning the clip sideways so it looked like a bubblegum coloured bow atop a mass of dark silk.

Sasuke felt his head and rolled his eyes.

"Thanks." He muttered sarcastically.

Naruto didn't reply. He sat idly fiddling with his flatmate's hair. It was beautiful, actually – and so soft – and _cooperative_. He'd always been a bit envious of that bit. He did everything he could in the morning to control the chaos of his own blond mop. He chewed on his lip.

"What's wrong, idiot?"

Sasuke was studying him carefully.

"You're thinking, and that's rarely a good thing."

Naruto gave Sasuke's hair a playful yank.

"Oh I don't know..."

Naruto paused. Well disclosure was usually the best policy, right?

"It's about these new friends of yours."

Sasuke said nothing.

"I'm kind of... well... jealous."

Sasuke startled.

"You're jealous?" He sounded incredulous.

"I mean I'm happy you have good people in your life, but I can't help it. I know it's not fair, but I'm used to being the most important person in your life, and it's hard to lose you."

The Uchiha remained silent.

"Maybe Sakura's right. Maybe I _am_ super controlling..."

Sasuke snorted. "Dumbass. You aren't controlling and you _aren't_ losing me."

The Uchiha rested one pale hand on his flatmate's knee.

Naruto gave him a little snort and a lopsided grin. Sasuke wasn't known to be terribly comfortable displaying affection. He pulled his thorny roommate into a hug – or more like pulled his head into a hug, pink clip and all, as he was seated above him. He threaded his fingers through his hair, and felt Sasuke deflate beside him.

"One more question..."

He felt more than heard Sasuke's 'hmm.'

"Why are you hiding your friends from us?"

Sasuke pulled out of the hug to look his friend in the eye.

"I'm not hiding them."

"Why won't you let me meet them?"

"I don't think you'll like them." Sasuke replied, his tone growing defensive.

"Well, they seem nice."

"They _are_ nice, they just…" Sasuke sighed heavily. "They have a different moral code from your average people, and I don't think you'll like it."

"What? They're like vigilante serial killers or something?"

"Υοu watch too much TV, idiot."

Naruto worried on his lip, continuing to run his fingernails along Sasuke's scalp.

Sasuke sighed loudly.

"Karin is a recovering junkie with a history of self harm. Suigetsu has more drugs in his system at any given moment than the police evidence locker. They're good people, Naruto, but they don't belong to your world."

Naruto remained silent for a moment as Sasuke appeared to study him intently.

"I get it." The blond replied, his voice a soft grumble in the silent room. "So they have self-destructive personalities."

"I'm not looking for your psychoanalyst bullshit, Naruto." His flatmate bit with a chill to his voice.

"Oh, hear me out, asshole." Naruto glared with all the intensity of a grumpy kitten. "I understand why you're attracted to people like that. It's not like it's a bad thing. Jeez."

Sasuke tilted his head. In fact, he always tilted his head when he was confused, and Naruto thought it was one of his more adorable habits. Of course, considering the fact that many of Sasuke's habits involved using Naruto as a punching bag, the competition for 'most adorable' wasn't terribly steep.

"Look, there's a reason why they do things like recovery in groups." Naruto continued. "There's a part of you, like a hidden darkness, that you think normal people can't understand – that I can't touch."

Sasuke blinked. He looked surprised.

"These friends of yours, Karin and Suigetsu, they understand that part of you. And you've built a separate dark self that you express for them."

Naruto tightened his grip in Sasuke's hair.

"I respect that." He continued. "And I respect that you want to keep these worlds distinct – to keep your darkness away from your real life. But be careful."

He ran his finger down a pale cheek.

Sasuke's breathing was faster than normal, rising and falling in his chest instead of his gut.

Naruto chuckled softly and pulled away. It seemed Sasuke had filled his human contact quota for the day.

"If something goes wrong," Naruto breathed. "You three can pull each other down. I don't think I could watch you lose yourself again. And…"

Naruto paused for dramatic effect.

"Just because I agree to respect your space, doesn't mean I'll stop wanting to meet the people you care about."

Sasuke nodded.

"Besides, asshole, adulthood is about integrating your different selves. Everyone has to do it at some point."

Naruto gave him a little punch on his bicep and pulled him in for one final squeeze. He frowned when he felt Sasuke's nearly imperceptible wince.

"Sorry, Uchiha. I can stop talking about my feelings so you can return to your manly pinkness."

Sasuke opened his mouth to respond, but the front door opened and a pink head popped inside.

The change in the room was palpable. Sasuke's eyes immediately hardened, like someone had slammed a window shut, while Sakura threw him a look that reeked disgustingly of jealousy. Naruto's stomach sank. Sakura's jealousy of his best friend's affection burnt him.

Sasuke gave her an ugly glare before pulling out the hair clip and gathering his papers.

"You don't have to go, Sasuke." Sakura brightened, trying to mask her faux pas. "I'm just stopping by for a couple of hours before work. We haven't seen each other much this week."

She nodded toward Naruto and gave him a wet smack on the lips. Naruto remained distracted, his eyes fixed on Sasuke's retreating form.

It was Sakura – this distance he'd been feeling. She had changed everything in their friendship. The girl he had loved all his life had driven a wedge between him and his best friend, and Naruto had spent four years pretending not to notice. The guilt slipped thick down his throat, and he didn't, for the life of him, know what to do.

Naruto gave his girlfriend a playful kiss on the nose and told her to wait. He followed Sasuke to his room.

"S'uke..."

A pair of blank black eyes regarded him.

"I'll just go get groceries. What do you want for dinner tonight?"

"Ra..."

"Besides ramen." Sasuke interrupted.

"Anything easy." Naruto replied. "I'm happy to cook?"

Sasuke gave him a doubtful look.

"OK, OK, I can't cook. But I can make delicious cake!"

Sasuke said nothing as he straightened his papers on his desk.

"What about that red sauce with the ham and stuff?" Naruto asked after a moment of silence.

"Amatriciana? Do you eat anything besides carbs?"

Sasuke was being snippy with him. God, wasn't communication supposed to go both ways?

"No... Sasuke, listen I..."

"I'll be back in two hours."

"Damnit Sasuke!"

Naruto jerked his chin toward him. His flatmate's eyes widened. He froze.

"This is exactly what I was talking about. You're running away from me. I know you hate Sakura, but help me out here. What the hell am I supposed to do? Can't I keep you both?"

Sasuke's rigid posture relaxed and he diverted his eyes.

"I don't hate her."

"What should I do?"

Naruto watched the colours of different responses flashing across his eyes.

Sasuke eventually shook his head.

"I don't know." He breathed heavily. "Spend the next two hours fucking your girlfriend, while I get the hell out of here."

"Sasuke..." Naruto pleaded.

"It's what I'd do. You said things have been going better. Enjoy it. I just don't particularly want to listen. Sakura is actually really loud, and you're not so quiet yourself."

Naruto could feel his cheeks flaming as he turned about two hundred different shades of purple.

"Whatever. I like to show my appreciation. You probably just grunt and curse and go 'hn.'"

Sasuke rolled his eyes. He was smirking. At least he wasn't pissy any more.

"I really wish we got along like we used to." Naruto bit the inside of his cheek. "We used to hang out all the time… the three of us."

His flatmate shook his head.

"She treats you like crap, idiot. It's hard to watch."

Naruto squeezed his roommate around the middle, muffling something in his shoulder that sounded suspiciously like 'Jesus Christ, you're snuggly today.' Naruto figured he was always snuggly, just Sasuke had usually punched him by now.

000

Sasuke pulled away, stuffing his wallet in the back pocket oh his jeans. He slipped out of the apartment without making further eye contact. As the click of the door echoed in the empty hallway, he settled heavily against the wall. Naruto's new dedication to patch the little rift in their friendship was excruciating. The touch – Naruto's hands and his emotional closeness smouldered in his gut, whisping smoke even in his fingertips. There was a reason he'd let the idiot slide slowly away in the first place.

The Uchiha sighed, digging in his coat pocket for his mobile phone. He smirked triumphantly when he found the number he was looking for.

"Juugo."

His voice had already adopted a lusty husk.

"I have two hours…"

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Any feedback is appreciated! :) Thanks for your support!


	3. Chapter 3

**Standard Disclaimer: **I do not own the characters of Naruto, nor do I make any money from playing with them.

**Summary:** He felt as though his life were over when he left her, with tears in her bright green eyes. But every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end. And sometimes you'll find out that your new beginning has been right beside you all along. Graduate School AU NaruSasuNaru

**Warnings: **Adult themes; Adult language; Drug and alcohol use; Promiscuity; Non-detailed sex scenes (m/m, possibly m/f and m/m/f) not enough to warrant NC-17, but explicit innuendo.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter Three <strong>

Sasuke sat crosslegged on his bed, his laptop casting a cool glow over his features in the poorly lit room. The bitter winter's wind rattled his windows and Sasuke startled. He stretched and yawned, glad for the warmth emanating from his cat.

She was splayed out beside him, basking in the warm air that blew out of the laptop's fan. She purred idly in her sleep. Sasuke would never understand why everyone thought she was Satan spawn. She was actually a very sweet cat... when she was sleeping.

Fucking hell, economics could be boring sometimes. The Uchiha closed his laptop with a huff and stared at the snow curling outside his window. Classes were canceled and Sasuke found the day actually rather dull for it.

He'd go seek out his flatmate, but he already tried that once today, and well... Sasuke could still feel his ears burning every time he thought about it.

Sasuke pushed through Naruto's door and his eyes widened in shock.

"Oh. My. God."

Naruto was propped up on his bed, his laptop open beside him, and it was pretty clear what he'd been doing. A look of horror passed over his face. He fumbled for a pillow while turning a deep shade of purple.

"Sasuke! Haven't you ever heard of knocking?!"

"Close your door _all the way_ when you're going to do something like that, moron!" He defended. "And lock it!"

Sasuke's dark eyes lowered of their own volition, and if possible, they widened even further. The Uchiha had seen many-a-fully-inflated-cock in his day, but Naruto still packed an impressive display. He was surprised he could fit that thing in his dinky little bathing suit.

"Holy shit!" He exclaimed before he could stop himself. "_That_ wasn't like that in middle school. No wonder Sakura always screams."

"Oh my god! Get OUT!"

Naruto gave up trying to cover himself and launched the pillow at his roommate.

Sasuke ducked out of the way, chuckling. He closed the door.

"Have fun!" He teased through the painted wood.

"You ruined it, asshole!"

It had been a long time since Sasuke had seen his friend look quite so embarrassed, and to be honest he found it actually very cute. On the other hand, now Sasuke was very very bored, and he certainly wasn't going to leave his bedroom until that dumbass came to get him.

His door swung open without warning. Speak of the devil.

"What did we learn about knocking today, idiot?"

Naruto's face turned a lovely panoply of shades of red. He slammed the door shut, was silent for several moments, and then knocked.

Sasuke rolled his eyes. Idiot.

"What?"

His flatmate popped back through the door grinning. He flopped on the bed next to Sasuke, causing everything that had previously been on the bed, including Sasuke, to nearly bounce off and onto the floor. The cat gave him a grumpy growl and tightened her claws into he bedspread.

"I'm bored." He whined.

"Good for you."

"Hey, how many times have I barged into your room without knocking?" Naruto asked, a pensive look colouring his big blue eyes.

"I don't know. Probably every day since we were sixteen?" Sasuke guessed.

"So, how come I never caught you... you know... doing that?"

"If you're too embarrassed to say the word 'masturbating' idiot, you probably shouldn't be doing it."

Naruto turned red again.

"Shut up, asshole! This is important!" He insisted. "Are you telling me you never..." Naruto cleared his throat. "Masturbate?"

Sasuke rolled his eyes.

"How is that important, exactly?"

The idiot pouted.

"Is this why you're so uptight all the time?" He asked.

Sasuke gave him an incredulous look.

"No. Dumbass."

Naruto's eyes remained imploring.

Sasuke sighed heavily. "It's not that I don't _ever_ do it. I just find it... lonely."

Naruto chewed on his lip and rested his chin on Sasuke's shoulder.

"You're lonely, S'uke?" He asked.

"Well, that's not it..." Sasuke paused, trying to think of a response that wasn't totally pathetic. "But if you have to do it yourself, it's because you don't have someone else to do it for you."

"Or because you're bored." Naruto offered.

Sasuke raised his eyebrows sceptically.

"OK, you're right. Sakura is mad at me right now... for something... But sometimes I just do it because I'm bored."

Naruto trailed off, his eyes drifting to the snow that swished past the window.

Sasuke rolled his eyes. He'd been exiled from the apartment _once again_ last night – into the bitter cold, he might add – due to Naruto and Sakura's amorous activities, and now they were already arguing? He didn't know how Naruto hadn't gotten whiplash by now from Sakura's crazy hot and cold treatment.

"But it doesn't _have_ to be lonely..." the idiot continued, pulling on Sasuke's arm. "You know, you can just imagine some faceless person with big boobies!"

"I don't think that's my problem." Sasuke responded.

Naruto cocked his head to the side.

"I mean, idiot, if I wanted to have anonymous sex with someone who's face I don't care to remember, I'll go have anonymous sex with someone who's face I won't care to remember." He clarified. "Why bother masturbating?"

Naruto's mouth made an 'O' of comprehension.

"So you _are_ lonely."

Sasuke looked at Naruto like he'd just contracted a contagious new disease.

"What the fuck are you talking about?"

"What you really want is a girlfriend!"

"I do not want a girlfriend, dumbass."

Sasuke's eyebrows were pinched together so tightly it seemed they had grown together.

"Oh come on, don't be so stuffy. Is there someone you already have in mind?"

"I don't want a girlfriend!"

Naruto brushed his black whispy bangs away from his eyes and Sasuke could feel his heart beginning to thump painfully in his stomach. His breath was growing heavy and he found he couldn't quite hold contact with those curious, bright eyes.

Great. Now the idiot would think he was lying to him.

"Is it... oh what's her face... Karin? The hot, troubled, ginger chick?"

"No!" Sasuke protested, his eyes snapping back to Naruto's.

"So there _is_ someone!"

"No, idiot, I just mean I don't want to be in a relationship with Karin."

"Oh come on S'uke. You're so full of shit."

Naruto took Sasuke's hands in his own and exposed them. Sweat had collected in his palms, making them cold and clammy. Sasuke closed his eyes and took a deep breath. His flatmate was misreading the tension that strummed through his body – luckily.

"Tell me about her?"

Sasuke sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Does she know?"

"No."

"Are you going to tell her?"

"No."

"Why the fuck not?! What kind of dumb ass girl wouldn't be into you?"

Sasuke turned away, choosing be distracted by the cat's furry, stripy legs. He tickled her knee. With every word Naruto spoke about this 'girl,' Sasuke could feel another little piece of his heart break off and drip painfully into the very bottom of his stomach.

"Well?" Naruto pressed.

"It's complicated, moron."

"So what's she like?"

Sasuke sighed for the millionth time, turning back to his annoying roommate. His beautiful, annoying roommate. His heart hammered again.

"I really don't want to talk about this."

"Just tell me one adjective!"

Sasuke said nothing.

"Pleeeease!"

"Fine. Unavailable."

Naruto huffed. "Unavailable! Are you kidding me?"

He gave his grumpy flatmate a disbelieving look.

"Hey, do I know her?"

Sasuke rolled his eyes, which despite the fact that he meant 'shut the fuck up, moron' apparently, Naruto understood it as a 'yes.' His look of disbelief snapped to horror.

"Oh god, please tell me it isn't Sakura!" He pleaded. "If you had the hots for Sakura, she'd probably dump my ass in seconds."

"Oh Jesus! I do _not_ have the hots for Sakura." Sasuke couldn't help his response. "That disgusting."

Naruto looked appalled.

"No offense." Sasuke added.

Naruto threw Sasuke a harmless glare and hummed thoughtfully.

"So you could have any girl on the planet, and you have to choose one who has a boyfriend?"

Sasuke was silent.

"And you call me an idiot."

Sasuke couldn't disagree. He remained quiet, feeling the rise and fall of Naruto's chest next to him. He dared a glance at his face. Naruto was staring out the window, the distinct look of heartbreak clouding his eyes. The idiot had gone and depressed himself, most likely thinking about Sakura.

Sasuke cursed whatever god was watching.

Well here's to self-sacrifice.

"Girlfriend." He interjected, interrupting only the whirl of the wind.

"What?"

Naruto blinked.

"The person I like has a _girl_friend. It's even worse than only unavailable."

"Oh fuck, Sasuke. Does she even like men?"

"Doubt it."

"That really sucks, man."

Sasuke hummed in agreement.

The two were left to the sounds of the weather outside – only momentarily, however, as Naruto was quite possibly not physically able to remain still and silent for more than fifteen seconds in a row.

He fiddled with his watch.

"OH!"

Naruto bounced himself off of the bed.

"I actually had a reason to come bug you."

Sasuke lifted his eyebrows.

"On Thursdays, the guys and I meet at five at a little diner close to campus. Last quarter, you always had class then..."

Naruto paused and scratched the back of his head.

"Well now that I think about it, it started _because_ you had class on Thursday evenings and I suck at cooking, but it became kind of a tradition, so..."

Sasuke rolled his eyes, not exactly following Naruto's deviation of plot.

"Anyway, this quarter you _don't_ have class, so I want you to come!"

Sasuke remained silent.

"Oh come on, asshole." Naruto pleaded playfully, poking him in the ribs.

The only response the Uchiha could manage was a very deep sigh.

"Look Sasuke," Naruto sat back down on the edge of the bed, "I know I haven't been a very good friend lately."

Sasuke cocked his head in confusion, staring into a pair of sincere blue eyes.

"I mean in some ways we're closer than ever." Naruto continued.

Sasuke suddenly found himself with a lap full of moron. He snorted when the idiot cursed, having disturbed Yugi and gotten a swipe on the back in retaliation. Good kitty.

Naruto glared at the cat, before his bright blue eyes found Sasuke's again.

"I mean, a year or two ago, you would have punched me if I tried to sit on your lap."

"I can punch you." Sasuke offered.

"But," Naruto ignored him. "I know I've sort of dropped the ball, and I want to make it up to you."

Sasuke sighed… again. He was beginning to sound like a respirator or something.

"Idiot, it's normal for friends' relationships to change over time."

"It's also normal for people who have been best friends since they were five to grow apart." Naruto leaned back in his roommate's lap and continued. "I don't want to lose you, Sasuke. You're too important."

Sasuke felt his stomach swell. It pressed against his heart, pushing it so that it hammered all the way up in his throat.

Naruto was staring at him with a fixed gaze, his eyebrows knitted in the centre.

"Look, I just want you to meet my friends. I don't expect you to be best buds or anything, or even come every week. But I want you to know that you're welcome and that you're wanted."

"Naruto…"

"_Pleeeease_, Sasuke. It would mean a lot to me."

Naruto pulled out his pouty-puppy look that Sasuke was _sure_ violated some Geneva convention on torture.

"Sakura won't be there?"

Sasuke felt the blond man stiffen in his lap, but he couldn't feel too sorry for him. It was painful enough just to be _around_ the idiot sometimes, but watching her wrap him tighter and tighter around her finger was just cruel. He wasn't quite so masochistic.

Naruto looked away.

"No, it's usually just the guys."

"Are you sure you're even meeting today?"

Sasuke nodded to the snowy landscape outside the window.

"Yep! Kiba just called. Chouji's stuck at Ino's, but mostly everyone can walk."

Sasuke heaved one final, massive sigh.

"Fine. I'll come."

Naruto's eyes lit up like a child's in a toyshop. He squeezed the littlest Uchiha so tightly Sasuke was sure he felt something pop.

"Well come on! We're going to be late!"

Naruto Uzumaki and Uchiha Sasuke were, in fact, _not_ late for the weekly dinner meeting of Naruto's friends. As it turned out, Naruto's excited pace through the blustering snow ensured that they arrived a good twenty minutes ahead of the designated meeting time.

Sasuke simply rolled his eyes, slid into a booth next to the window, and promptly ordered a cup of black coffee.

"So," Naruto began, snuggling with his hot cocoa, "did you try 'the look' on her?"

"What the hell are you talking about?"

Sasuke let the thick bitter coffee slide down his throat, warming him from the inside. He smiled in spite of himself.

"On the girl that you like…"

"I have no idea what you're talking about, dumbass."

"You know, like last week, when you um..." Naruto scratched the back of his head. "When I um … accidentally... almost kissed you?"

"Oh."

Sasuke wasn't sure he had ever accidentally kissed someone… except that one time.

"Did you use it on the girl?"

The Uchiha swirled his coffee around in his cup.

"Oh my god! You did! And?"

"And what, idiot?"

"And did it work?"

Sasuke shrugged.

"Almost." He admitted with a smirk.

"So there _is_ hope!"

Sasuke shrugged again.

"You have _got_ to try it again." Naruto encouraged.

The Uchiha looked up from his coffee into the shining blue eyes of his best friend. Should he try again? He could do it right here, try to seduce Naruto – here in this near empty diner. He tilted his head pensively and felt his gaze fall to Naruto's lips. They sparkled with the remnants of his cocoa. He could feel his heart rate increase as his nerves raced each other to his fingertips and back. His eyes found Naruto's again, and they had widened slightly.

He shook his head, breaking eye contact, and sighed. No. He wasn't ready for this. Naruto sure as hell wasn't.

He was about to say something, _anything_ to change the subject when a knock on the window startled them both. Staring in from the wintery scene was none other than the Michelin man, bundled in a long, puffy white coat, with a little tuft of red hair popping out in random directions from the hood. It gave them a furious, excited little wave, then hurried to the door.

Sasuke may have been thankful for the distraction, but he was not thankful to see who slipped out of the white coat when the blast of the heater met her inside.

"Hey there pretty boy!" Karin chirped.

Naruto's eyes bugged. Sasuke could only hope he had missed the nickname, too distracted by Karin's outfit. Under her coat, she was wearing a seriously kinky Catholic school uniform. How she wasn't freezing, Sasuke would never know

She plopped gracelessly into Sasuke's lap.

"Karin, what the hell are you wearing?" He asked dryly.

"What?" Karin feigned innocence. "I have a date."

"To a fetish party?" Sasuke asked in a sardonic drawl.

"Maybe." She paused. "Why, do you want to come?" She purred into his ear, pushing her cleavage into his face.

Sasuke schooled his face to neutral, and gently extracted his face from Karin's boobs.

"No thanks."

Karin turned to the other occupant of the booth, who was currently sitting open-mouthed, and apparently trying – and failing miserably – not to stare at the supple breasts that had suddenly presented themselves at the table.

"Karin Kusa." She chirped, reaching across the table.

Naruto shook her hand.

"Naruto Uzumaki. Nice to meet you." He grinned.

"My, my." Karin clicked her tongue. "You're even better looking up close."

"Um…" Naruto sputtered. "You too?"

Karin chuckled warmly. "You're sweet. But of course, I've heard so much about you. I feel I already know you."

Naruto startled. Sasuke could feel him trying to catch his eye, but suddenly he found the rust mark on the napkin holder particularly interesting.

"Oh great." The blond muttered under his breath.

"Oh don't worry." Karin assured him. "He only bitches about you when he's sober, and we both know Sasuke's capacity for speech is limited then. He's actually got a lot of nice things to say about you."

Sasuke could feel his cheek's burning, and he was thankful for the first time that Karin's tits were covering half of his face.

"Oh?" Naruto leaned forward on his elbows.

Sasuke chanced a look across the table.

Naruto looked somehow soft. When his bright eyes slid from Karin's to his own, they just held each other there, eyes locked, frozen in a moment. And then he smiled. Not his usual goofy grin, rather a small, thoughtful and hesitant smile – still a little lopsided, but never quite so revealing.

"I'm glad to hear it." His voice was warm and low.

Sasuke was finding it rather hard to breathe.

His flatmate nudged him gently under the table.

"I always knew you were a big softie."

Sasuke tossed him a glare and went back to inspecting at the rusty napkin holder.

"So how much alcohol does it take to get him to talk?" Naruto asked.

"Oh alcohol won't work." Karin supplied, twisting in Sasuke's lap to look at him. "He has to be rolling to get chatty."

Sasuke felt his heart plummet.

"What's rolling?" Naruto asked innocently.

"That's enough, Karin." Sasuke's voice took on an icy edge.

Karin didn't miss a beat.

"It's nothing, sweetheart."

She leaned toward the blond, and with a prevaricating dip of her shoulders, let her cleavage spill out of her blouse. She was millimetres away from a nip-slip, and Naruto seemed to be acutely aware of this fact.

"I'm actually really glad I saw you in here, gorgeous." She added, still not removing her boobs from the table."

Naruto was beginning to drool.

"I seriously have to use the little girls' room."

She paused idly fiddling Sasuke's bangs.

"Although I have to be careful how I get up. I'm pretty sure I'm not wearing panties."

Sasuke snorted with disbelief, but Naruto immediately began choking, having just taken a sip from his cocoa.

He blushed to the tips of his toes.

"Oh how cute." Karin sent him an indulgent smile. "He's good looking, sweet _and_ incredibly innocent."

She tapped her polished nails on the table.

"There has to be something wrong with you."

She leaned even further forward. Naruto looked up from her breasts. He looked a little terrified.

"Do you have a small dick or something?"

Naruto's jaw seemed to have become dislocated from the rest of his face.

"Oh wait, check that." She hummed, her lips pulling into a coy smirk. "I saw you in your bathing suit. I know you're a big boy."

Naruto was now so purple he was actually beginning to look blue.

"Oh my god. Seriously, Karin?" Sasuke huffed, not caring that he sounded distinctly ruffled.

She yanked a clump of Sasuke's hair and it actually kind of hurt.

"You're no fun." She pouted, slipping effortlessly off of Sasuke's lap.

Naruto was staring at the ceiling, clearly making a great amount of effort not to slip his eyes under her skirt.

"I was serious about taking a piss." She commented. "Hold my stuff?"

She dumped her dripping coat, hat, gloves and purse into Sasuke's lap.

"I'll be right back." She sang, skipping to the restrooms.

Sasuke glared at her back.

"Holy shit!" Naruto burst after catching his breath. "That's some friend you've got there!"

His chest heaved a few more times.

Sasuke snorted.

"She was fucking with you. She apparently thinks you're fun to play with."

Naruto remained pensive, nodding and pursing his lips.

"So… is she, or is she not wearing underpants?" He finally asked.

Sasuke shrugged, rolling his eyes. The idiot would take _that_ away from their conversation.

"Still, hell of a catch you made there, S'uke." Naruto nodded appreciatively. "Is she good in bed?"

Sasuke blinked a couple of times.

"Please. I've never seen a straight man so comfortable around a pair of tits that he hasn't gotten to play with repeatedly. You're clearly banging her."

Sasuke felt his eye twitch a little.

"Did you honestly just use the word 'banging,' idiot?"

"Seriously, asshole…"

"Seriously, dipshit. How old are you?"

"Come on! I have to live vicariously though you!"

"No you don't. Karin would probably sleep with you if you asked nicely."

"Are you guys talking about Karin Kusa?" A female voice spoke from behind Naruto.

Both heads snapped up. Sakura Haruno. Great.

Sasuke directed his most potent glare at his flatmate, who for his part, looked extremely confused.

"What are you doing here, Sakura?" Naruto stammered.

"I was a total bitch to you this morning. I wanted to come make it up to you. I thought you'd want to see me..."

"I do want to see you, I just wish you'd called."

Naruto gave her a pathetic smile. Sasuke felt his upper lip curling of its own volition.

"Well it was supposed to be a surprise, and now I'm glad I didn't call. Why are you talking about having sex with other women?" She demanded.

"Oh come on Sakura. Do you have to turn everything into a fight? I think I'm allowed to joke with my best friend about his girlfriend."

Sakura's face went blank.

"Karin's not my girlfriend."

Sasuke could see the puzzle pieces clicking behind Sakura's light eyes.

"That girl's bad news, Sasuke." She said after several tense moments. "She's in my class..." She continued as though that explained everything.

"I'm afraid I don't see how she concerns you." Sasuke bit back.

"She's a total slut."

"Sakura!" Naruto exclaimed.

"To be fair, idiot, Karin _is_ a total slut. She will tell you that herself."

Sasuke turned a pair of stormy black eyes toward Sakura.

"Nevertheless," he continued, "I fail to understand why you think Karin's sex life is any of your business."

"Why are you defending her?" Sakura snapped.

"She's my friend. And you have _no_ right to impose your moral judgment upon someone else's life."

"Come on, Sasuke." Naruto began.

"She's disgusting! She's sleeping with other people!" Sakura interrupted.

"And?"

Sakura's jaw snapped shut with a click.

"I never asked for Karin's fidelity, and she would never ask for mine. What Karin does with me, or anyone else for that matter, is none of your damn business. And frankly, your jealousy of her is nauseating."

Sakura looked like she was about to cry. Her mouth moved a couple of times, but nothing came out.

"Sasuke, you asshole!"

Naruto stood and wrapped his arms protectively around his girlfriend.

"You're sticking up for her?"

"She was wrong to insult your friend, but that was too far!"

"Of _course_ you're taking her side in this."

"It's not that..."

"You really want to know what is going wrong in our friendship, Naruto?"

Sasuke stood, digging in his pocket for his wallet.

"It's this. You _always_ choose her. No matter what the situation. No matter who's wrong. No matter who actually needs or _wants_ you."

Naruto's face cracked, flashing between rage and desperation, but Sasuke could no longer stop himself.

"If I've gone too far, it's because it's true. Wake the fuck up, moron. She doesn't love you."

Sakura had begun to shake in Naruto's arms.

Sasuke flipped a couple of bills on the table, just as Karin came out of the bathroom.

"And to answer your question. Yes, Karin is _fantastic_ in bed."

Sakura squeezed her eyes shut, tears leaking beneath her long lashes, and buried her face in her boyfriend's broad chest.

"Fine then, asshole. Run away. It's what you do best, anyway. That'll make it better."

"You've chosen to spend your evening with your whore, so I'll spend the night with mine."

Sasuke could see fire dancing behind Naruto's eyes. He didn't care anymore.

"You son of a bitch!" Naruto spat.

"At least Karin and I have no illusions about what we mean to each other."

He turned and intercepted Karin on her way to the table.

"Did you just call me your whore?" She asked, threading her fingers through Sasuke's.

"Does this mean you'll start paying me?" She teased.

"No."

"You could at least buy me dinner."

Sasuke helped her into her big, puffy coat. He held her chin between his fingers.

"Karin, does it break your rules if I kiss you without Suigetsu here, if it's merely for vindictive reasons?" He growled into her ear.

She paused. "Hmm… probably not, but I'm pretty sure it breaks yours."

Sasuke shrugged.

"It's not affectionate, so not really."

Karin closed her eyes and stood on her tippy toes.

Sasuke captured her lips, burying his fingers into her long, thick hair. His kiss brimmed with the passion of his anger, but he kept it slow and languid, just to ensure that idiot and his stupid girlfriend caught every second.

He tossed one final glance over his shoulder at the couple behind him. Naruto looked a little thunderstruck, yet furious – though Sasuke wasn't entirely sure with whom. Sakura just cried silently with her head on the table.

He threw them a look of contempt, then, wrapping his arm around the smaller figure beside him, pushed outside into the bitter snow.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: <strong>Nearly done with the revisions. Now I just have to get to work on the new stuff ;)

Leave me a comment and let me know what you think.


	4. Chapter 4

**Author's Note:**

Hello all! I'm so sorry for the delay in uploading this chapter. I'm travelling to America for the holidays, and would you believe that I got stuck in not one, but TWO awful winter storms. Apparently, another one is scheduled for tomorrow. I never thought I would want to trade all that beautiful snow they get over here for the bleak midwinter's rain, but it sure does make travelling complicated.

Excuses aside, here is the revised edition of chapter four. I do suggest giving it a read. It is the chapter that has changed the most. In other news, chapter five is written, I'll give it a final edit and upload it in the next few days.

* * *

><p>Chapter Four (revised)<p>

The ice clinked together as Naruto refilled the whiskey in his tumbler. He swirled the amber liquid around a couple of times, braced himself, then knocked back the entire contents of his glass. He shuddered and slammed the glass back on the coffee table, the clunk echoing in they empty apartment.

Naruto was having a very bad day.

Pathetic. Drinking alone on a Friday night. He looked at the clock. Saturday morning…

It had been some thirty-three hours since his fight with his best friend, and he hadn't yet managed to make it right.

He frowned, pushing the sweat from his glass around on the table with his index finger. The squeak almost made him smile. Almost. He huffed and threw himself backwards on the couch. He could feel the whiskey rolling in his head.

He'd been sitting on this very couch only a few hours ago, when Sasuke slipped out that door. He had wanted to talk things out, but things hadn't turned out the way he planned. Things got… odd.

"Sasuke, wait." Naruto called from his spot on the sofa.

He stood.

"Are you going out?"

Sasuke nodded without looking up. He was fussing with his shoes.

Naruto crossed the room, determined to have this out. Sasuke didn't usually go out on Friday nights. He must be seriously pissed.

"Look, about yesterday… I'm upset about what you said about Sakura, but…" Naruto trailed off.

His pissy flatmate finally looked up, and Naruto couldn't contain his gasp.

"Sasuke, are you wearing…"

He found his hand cupping one pale cheek. He couldn't remember reaching out to touch him.

Yes. Sasuke's eyes were outlined in a hazy black. And he'd be damned if he said it didn't look fucking amazing on him. Coupled with that outfit – tight black jeans and a shirt with just enough fishnetting to be hard-core – he was downright sexy.

He could feel Sasuke's skin heating beneath his hand – blushing. And the little fucker was refusing to make eye contact. Naruto smirked.

"God damn, S'uke. You look like a rock star." His voice came out in a low rumble.

Sasuke's big black eyes jumped to his. He looked startled. His lips parted momentarily but no sound came out.

Naruto decided that his eyes were lingering on his best friend's lips longer than was strictly necessary. He could feel his own cheeks growing florid, so he lifted his eyes back to the smoky pair across from his.

"I don't suppose there are many men who could pull off a look like that. I'd probably look like a bad drag queen."

Sasuke smiled for the first time. Well, it was more of a smirk. And he held his gaze there, almost unblinking.

There was a tension in the air – a fire perhaps, or a current of electricity – and it wound itself inside of Naruto's stomach and pulled him from the inside. Sasuke was just so undeniably beautiful that Naruto thought he might suffocate.

So Sasuke just stood there, with innocent and curious eyes, still apparently unable to speak.

This feeling, this tension, it wasn't unpleasant. In fact, it sang to him – this air so stuffed with potential – whispering for him to do the unthinkable.

And so he did. Or almost did, that was. His hand slid itself to the nape of Sasuke's neck, and he pulled him closer. Sasuke appeared startled, but not unwilling. Or perhaps he was too startled to protest.

Naruto would never know, because in that very moment, an inch from his best friend's lips, the door to their apartment swung open, nearly decapitating them both.

"What the fuck?" He whispered, not sure exactly to what he was referring.

Sasuke looked equally shell-shocked.

"Oh hi!"

Sakura. Naruto wasn't sure if he was happy or disappointed that she interrupted that odd little moment. It was becoming a trope, Naruto thought. She was developing a bad habit of ruining these moments. Regardless, Naruto had forgotten she was dropping by.

"Woah! You look hot!" She blurted to Sasuke.

She immediately slapped her hand over her mouth in horror.

Naruto couldn't manage to feel offended, though Sakura gave him an apologetic grimace, nonetheless. He just shrugged. It's not like Sakura had been the one who was about to…

Oh my dear lord.

Naruto licked his lips, and was beginning to think that something large and pointy was trying to claw its way out of his throat.

"I'm actually glad you're here."

Sakura smiled nervously at Sasuke.

Through her slightly-too-perky chatter, Sakura failed to notice the awkward silence that had settled over the other two occupants of the room.

"I'm really sorry for insulting your friend yesterday. It was immature and totally uncalled for."

Sasuke shrugged, looking away.

"I don't even know Karin. It isn't fair for me to pass judgement on her, just because I don't agree with her lifestyle. Please forgive me?"

Sasuke sighed loudly. Naruto knew that it was one of Sasuke's biggest pet peeves for a person to apologise when he wanted to be angry with them. It almost made Naruto chuckle.

"I probably shouldn't have called you a whore." He admitted in a grudging monotone, though he didn't look too pleased to apologise.

"No, that was really mean." Sakura pouted. "But I know how loyal you are to your friends."

She rested her hand on Naruto's forearm, and he startled. His heart was still racing. Sakura didn't notice.

She smiled, looking a little too pleased with herself, in Sasuke's opinion.

His eyes narrowed, zeroing in on Sakura's gentle touch on Naruto's arm.

"That aside, Haruno." His voice was flat. "Don't think that your apology excuses everything."

The smile dropped from her face.

"I…" She began uncertainly. "I don't understand."

Her nails dug into Naruto's shirt, as though he were some damn security blanket. It was a show of possession if he had ever seen one.

Naruto's heavy sigh filled the room.

"Come on S'uke." He could hear a gentle urgency in his voice. "Let's not do this now."

"Then when?" Sasuke demanded, deadpan.

His gaze bore into Sakura's wide, green vise. "I don't like people fucking with my friends."

"She's not fucking with me." Naruto's serious voice cut through the tension between them.

He reached out, taking the hem of Sasuke's sleeve between his ruddy fingers.

"I mean, it's not exactly news that she has the hots for you." He clarified.

Sasuke heard Sakura take a sharp breath. At least she had the decency to look embarrassed.

"It's normal to be attracted to other people. Don't get me started on Angelina Jolie." The blond jabbed with a playful smile.

Sasuke would have smirked in any other circumstance. As it were, he remained unmoved.

"And anyway," Naruto's smile was too sincere. "I'm pretty sure anyone with eyes has the hots for you."

Sasuke didn't like the way his heart started hammering in his throat when the idiot said that. He didn't like the way that Naruto's knuckles against his wrist were sending little sparks of static all the way up to his elbow. He especially didn't like the soft, pleading blue eyes, and the way they made him want to push Sakura away and get lost somewhere in Naruto's bulky arms.

"The important thing is that I trust her. She's not going to leave me for you."

Sasuke was half-tempted to snort out some derogatory remark about her chances with him, but the roll of his eyes left it understood.

His gaze flicked to Sakura, who finally seemed to notice that something special was passing between the two boys. She was glancing back and forth, her lower lip pinched between her teeth. She pulled Naruto's arm closer, hugging it to her chest.

Naruto tugged on his sleeve, ignoring Sakura for the time being. "Please, Sasuke."

If Naruto knew the effect that one little word had on him, Sasuke would most likely be enslaved to him for life.

So innocent and pure, Naruto was. Thoughtlessly flinging his beating heart in all directions, without regard to the possibility that someone might abuse it. His eyes were just _begging_ him to drop the subject.

Let me get hurt. _Please._

He felt himself deflating.

"You are such an idiot." Sasuke bit, sounding as sour as he felt.

He dropped his eyes, cold seeping into his skull where Naruto's warm liquid vise had been supporting him.

Fuck it. He thought.

For a moment he considered grabbing Naruto by his collar and kissing the daylights out of him right in front of Sakura. It could also work the other way around probably, but Naruto would never forgive him for touching his girlfriend, even if it were for his own good.

Fuck it.

If Naruto was so determined to get hurt, who was he to stop him?

He snatched his coat off of the hook and slid out of the door without another word.

He heard Naruto curse behind him.

Fuck it. He thought. Fuck him.

He'd go out, just like he intended, and show Juugo the night of his life.

"Hey, um… Sasuke!" Naruto called, some three steps from the door.

Sasuke turned and their eyes met.

From across the hall, the intensity of their conversation, of that almost-kiss settled thick on Naruto's tongue. What the fuck was going on?

"I… um…"

Naruto couldn't bear the weight of Sasuke's hot, insisting stare. He looked at his feet.

"I… well… I don't know."

He looked back up to Sasuke, hoping he would understand.

Apparently that was a negative. The other man simply reeked of disapproval.

"Whatever."

The asshole turned on his heel and stalked down the hallway.

"Sasuke, wait!" Naruto shouted down the hallway.

But he didn't. He let the door to the stairwell slam shut behind him with an echoing bang.

"Fuck!" Naruto swore, staring down the empty hallway.

* * *

><p>"Fuck." He repeated from the couch.<p>

He was met, suddenly, with a face full of orange. Kyuubi licked his nose, then tried to find a place on his belly to settle in for some love. Naruto winced. He seriously needed to put his cat on a diet. He rubbed the cat's broad, fluffy shoulders, smiling slightly as the cat made the happiest face imaginable.

"You're too freaking cute, Kyu." Naruto mumbled, matching the low rumble of his cat's purr.

Naruto closed his eyes and relaxed. They whiskey settled heavy in his veins and he let himself drift about the room.

A scratching at the door startled Naruto, and he sat up suddenly. His cat rolled gracelessly into his lap. The door swung open to reveal what was possibly the largest man Naruto had ever seen in person. The blond feared momentarily for his life, but he jumped to his feet when he realised that this incredibly large human being had Sasuke cradled against him like a child.

Naruto was not a small man. He reached an impressive six foot two and retained the musculature of years of swimming. Nonetheless, this hulk of a man, with messy red hair spilling over his forehead, towered over him. He must have topped two metres.

Sasuke pulled away from him, and Naruto missed neither the frown on the large man's face, nor Sasuke's wince as he collided with the wall. Sasuke slid to a seated position on the floor, and started working on his shoes.

Naruto cleared his throat on impulse. Two heads snapped to him. Naruto missed the red headed man's reaction, however, because Sasuke's face lit up like Christmas morning.

"S'uke." Naruto whispered, finding himself on his knees in front of his best friend.

He couldn't remember the last time he saw a smile like that on Sasuke's face. He brushed the sweaty mop away from Sasuke's forehead.

"Are you OK?" He whispered, framing that precious face in his hands.

Sasuke nodded.

"_Daijoubu, daijoubu da yo_!" He insisted in Japanese. _I'm OK. I'm OK!_

The man above them tutted in annoyance. It made Naruto wonder if Sasuke hadn't been speaking in Japanese for some time now.

"I don't think your friend can understand you." Naruto reprimanded in his own stilted Japanese.

"I'm OK." Sasuke slurred. "A little drunk." He admitted.

Naruto hummed. "You party like a rock star, too."

He traced Sasuke's leaking eyeliner with his fingers, not caring when Sasuke closed his clammy hands around his own. He closed his eyes, enjoying the feeling of Sasuke breathing against him.

It was the growl from above that reminded Naruto that the two were not alone. The venom in the man's look could be mistaken for nothing but pure, unadulterated jealousy. Naruto returned the heat of his glare, well aware that if this man decided to attack him, he would be seriously, _seriously_ fucked. Refusing to break eye contact, he pulled Sasuke protectively into his arms.

The man blinked several times. A placid look returned to his face, leaving no evidence of the ugly scowl that had sent about a litre of adrenaline shooting into Naruto's veins.

Sasuke's head lulled against his chest

"What did you give him?" Naruto demanded.

The man blinked again.

"I know it isn't just alcohol." Naruto growled. "What did you give him?"

"Nothing dangerous."

Naruto was visibly surprised at how soft the man's voice was.

"It's just the stuff they put in energy drinks. It's a stimulant."

Naruto nodded, still glaring. "So he crashed."

"It should be out of his system already." The man agreed. "Although he's still a little drunk."

Naruto sighed deeply, scowling at the semi-conscious man in his arms.

"Take care of him, Sunshine." The man said in all but a whisper. "You're very lucky, you know."

And just like that he was gone. Like some terrifying apparition, he disappeared from the apartment, letting the door close silently behind him. Naruto couldn't even hear his footsteps in the hallway.

He sighed again and pulled Sasuke's shoes off of his feet.

Naruto knew he wasn't exactly the brightest crayon in the box, but it didn't take a rocket scientist to understand what had just happened. Uchiha Sasuke was sleeping with that man.

"S'uke." Naruto whispered, cradling Sasuke softly in his arms.

He pressed his nose against the other man's temple and breathed. The smell of sex was still thick on his skin, mixing with a husk that Naruto didn't recognise. It must have been that man's scent. Naruto felt the unmistakable curling of anger deep in his gut. That _dangerous_ man.

Sasuke's fingers looped weakly in his shirt.

"Oh, S'uke." Naruto repeated, sliding his nose down the hollow of his cheek, his head spinning slightly. "_You_ are such an idiot."

Naruto heaved a final massive sigh, and pulled Sasuke to his feet. The smaller man leaned heavily against him, and it took Naruto more effort than he cared to admit to keep his balance as the room spun before him.

"Let's get you to bed." He mumbled against the crown of his head.

* * *

><p>It was a remarkably bright day for a funeral, Jiraiya thought. The smell of spring lingered in the air. He pulled his thick, white ponytail off of his neck, feeling a tiny tickle of sweat rolling down his back. Jiraiya couldn't pay attention to the eulogy. His throat kept getting a little too sticky.<p>

He could hardly believe that those two beautiful people were gone. Their lives, vibrancy, all that love, just… gone. The mere thought of their empty bodies fading away… Jiraiya sniffed loudly.

An angry looking teenager sat next to him, glaring steadfastly at the ground with his one good eye. Jiraiya didn't really know this boy, but he had been told that he had been in the accident too.

They were blindsided by a drunk driver. Jiraiya could imagine the details—screaming breaks, the sickening sound of impact, of bursting glass, rolling over and over down into that ditch. He could almost taste the fear humming in the air for those few fatal seconds and hear the final crunch of metal as the car landed on its side. It made him sick to his stomach. That angry boy was able to pull himself out of the passenger window, but the other side of the car had been completely destroyed. He took little Naruto from his mother's weak arms through the biting, broken glass of the back.

"Thank you, Kakashi." She whispered through bloody lips.

He saved that sweet, little boy, but he couldn't save Kushina or Minato.

So he sat with glass imbedded in his eye, clutching a wailing five-year old, as he watched the life slip away from his two most important people.

Jiraiya didn't blame young Kakashi, but he could see that he blamed himself.

It was to this five-year old, bandaged from head to toe, that Jiraiya now turned his attention. He sat quietly next to him, disturbingly still. Indeed part of his energy seemed to be buried in the ground next to his parents. He was confused, scared and he still didn't understand why everyone looked so sad when he asked where his mommy and daddy were.

Jiraiya had never expected to be a father. When his favourite young student had asked him to be his son's _godfather_, he had been honoured. Godfather was one of those titles that was practically meaningless, assuming all went well. Needless to say, all had not gone well.

He pulled Naruto closer to him, trying to give him a reassuring smile. Naruto looked a little terrified, and Jiraiya sighed. This fatherhood thing was going to be difficult. At least the little brat was potty-trained.

One week later, he finally settled Naruto into his apartment in the city. Perhaps it wasn't ideal, but his life-long best friend (and occasional girlfriend) had a nice house in the suburbs with a big garden. Naruto could play outside during the weekends, and maybe some days after school, if he was lucky.

He wasn't in any rush to find Naruto a new school. He visited five kindergarten classes, trying to find the kid a good match. He figured Naruto could use some time getting used to his new surroundings before he plunged him into school, anyway. Although it retrospect, he supposed, it wouldn't have mattered. The kid was adapting like a charm to his new routine – all smiles and giggles.

Except for one thing…

"Where are Mommy and Daddy?" He asked every night before bedtime.

"They're gone, kid." Jiraiya tried to explain, as patiently as he could.

One day, Naruto must have gotten fed up with this explanation, because he stamped his foot and huffed as menacingly as a disgruntled kitten.

"I know they're _gone_, but when are they coming back?" He crossed his arms over his chest and pouted.

Jiraiya sat down on the edge of Naruto's bed, feeling the wood groan beneath his weight. Naruto scurried onto the bed next to him, looking positively adorable in his new froggy footie pyjamas.

"They aren't coming back, Naruto."

A pair of blue eyes widened.

"They don't want to…" he trailed off, looking horrified, punctuating his sentence with a tiny hiccough.

"Of course they want to, but they _can't_ come back." He tried to emphasise.

If possible, the little boy became even more distraught.

"So they're… lost?" His voice nearly disappeared into the sound of traffic humming on the street far below.

Jiraiya sighed, remembering the brat's screaming panic the night before, when he couldn't find his ridiculous nightcap. The poor kid would probably go crazy if he thought he'd lost his parents under his bed or in that terrifying wardrobe in the corner.

"They're not exactly, lost, per se."

Jiraiya wished, quite possibly for the first time in his life, that he were a religious man, and could feed the little boy some simple story about heaven and angels and all that shiny stuff upstairs.

"They're not exactly _gone_ either." He continued.

Naruto looked sceptical, his lips twisting sideways, his expression saying 'well make up your mind, why don't you!'

"They're still here." Jiraiya tried to explain, waving his hands frantically. "But it's different."

Naruto rolled his little blue eyes.

"I mean, you can't see them, or touch them, but they're still here, loving you, watching over you."

Naruto looked around wildly.

"Really?" He gasped. "Where?"

Jiraiya tapped on the green fleece pyjamas with his knuckle.

"They're here, in your heart."

Naruto quickly unzipped his jammies, staring wide-eyed at his little brown chest.

"Really?" He sounded amazed. "Why?"

"Because they love you so much. And you love them back. They had to hang around to watch you grow up."

"But how did they get in there?" Naruto was growing impatient.

The old man sighed. "They passed away, kid. Their bodies got broken and tired, and they _had_ to go to your heart."

"Oh." Naruto chewed on his lip. "Like Gamma?"

Jiraiya cocked his head.

"My fish!"

Naruto indicated a little empty fishbowl on his dresser.

"Daddy had three, Affa, Beta, Gamma… except Gamma was mine. But he didn't like when I changed his water and he died. We had to flush him down the toilet…"

Naruto paused looking horrified.

"Do we have to flush Mommy and Daddy down the toilet?"

Jiraiya let a little chuckle blossom in his throat.

"No, we put people in the ground when they pass."

He could see Naruto connecting the dots behind his big blue eyes.

"What if I miss them?" He asked after a pause, his voice growing thin.

"Talk to them." Jiraiya suggested. "They're listening even if they can't talk back."

Naruto nodded solemnly.

"Will they ever leave my heart?" He asked, clutching his skin with his blunt little fingers.

"Nope." Jiraiya assured him. "Just as long as you remember them and love them, they'll always be there."

Naruto looked up at his godfather, innocent and sombre. He placed his tiny hand on Jiraiya's heart, and it was almost lost in the folds of fabric that covered his massive chest.

"They're in here, too. Aren't they?" Little Naruto's voice was soft and earnest, suddenly wiser than his five years belied. "I can tell."

Jiraiya placed his large hand on Naruto's, encasing it completely. "They sure are, kiddo."

He blinked, but the tears were still there when he opened his eyes.

"It's OK." Naruto was looking up at him with tears in his own bright eyes. "You can cry, old man."

He couldn't help but snort at the insult. This truly was Kushina's son.

"Mommy always says that sometimes the strongest thing you can do is cry when you need to. So you can cry out all the sad and make room for more smiles."

One lone tear streaked down Naruto's cheek, disappearing into the bandages that still covered half his face.

"And it's OK to be sad when you miss someone." He continued. "That's how you know you love them."

Jiraiya scooped up the tiny child from his bed and tucked him protectively into his chest. He buried his face in the unruly yellow mop, feeling Naruto's little fingers digging into his shirt, his small body hiccoughing with sobs. Jiraiya cried for the first time in many years, whispering kisses onto his little crown.

"You're such a precious child." He murmured, feeling Naruto relaxing in his arms. "Such a sweet, precious child."

In that very moment, with Naruto sleeping softly in his embrace, and tears pouring from his eyes, he decided this fatherhood thing wouldn't be so tough after all.

"Is my fish in my heart too?" Naruto whispered as Jiraiya tried to sneak from his bed.

"Did you love him?" He paused at the door.

"I think so. But I would have loved him more if he were a cat."

Jiraiya chuckled that kind of tired, euphoric chuckle that you can only have after having a good, cathartic cry.

"Goodnight kiddo." He whispered into the dark.

"Sleep tight." Naruto replied through a yawn.

Jiraiya stayed in the doorway as the minutes ticked by, watching as the little kid fell into a sound sleep. He promised that he would love Naruto twice as much, to make up for the parents that he had lost. He would fiercely protect this child, and prove to him that he was the most loved human being on the planet. And he kept his promise until the day that he died.

* * *

><p>Naruto awoke in Sasuke's bed. There was but a moment's confusion before his pounding headache reminded him of last night's whiskey intake, and the events that happened thereafter.<p>

He relaxed into Sasuke's seriously comfortable pillows with a sigh. It had been a very long time since Naruto had dreamt of Jiraiya. He smiled and clutched his heart, sending him his love, wherever he was.

On to more important things: Sasuke was gay. Uchiha Sasuke was gay. Uchiha 'every-girl's-wet-dream' Sasuke was fucking other men.

What. The. Fuck.

Sasuke was still sleeping, sprawled out on top of him, a small puddle of drool leaking onto Naruto's shoulder.

Naruto's nose twitched. Gross. Sasuke drools in his sleep. Who would have thought?

So Sasuke was gay… (and more surprisingly a drooler!)

Naruto could not wrap his brain around this concept.

At least it explained why he looked more startled than offended last night when Naruto was going to… Naruto's eyes flew open. Oh my, that did change his perspective a bit.

And then… when he was helping Sasuke into his pyjamas last night…

He rubbed his hand along the corded muscle of his neck, feeling his skin heating along the way.

_Naruto deposited Sasuke on his bed, snatching his neatly folded jammies off of his desk chair. He didn't bother switching on the light. He stumbled back to the bed, stubbing his toe along the way. He cursed loudly before realising that it didn't really hurt as badly as he anticipated. Apparently, whiskey can make your toes numb. He wiggled his toes and filed that piece of information that under items for later consideration. _

_ He looked from Sasuke, sitting demur and listless on his bed, to the pyjamas in his hands. Sasuke blinked innocently, eyes hazy from the alcohol._

_ "Come on, dude." Naruto whined. "Are you going to put on your jammies, or what?" _

_ Sasuke shot him a one-eyed glare and attempted to swipe the flannel pants from Naruto's open hand. Fortune, however, seemed not to be on his side, and his intoxicated roommate missed, crashing into the heap of pillows on his bed. _

_ Naruto laughed so hard he snorted. Sasuke, on the other hand, remained face down in his pillows, blissfully unaware of his own predicament. _

_ "Whatever man." Naruto giggled._

_ With effort, he pulled back the covers for Sasuke to climb inside, and was about to chuck the pyjamas and head for his own bed, but a fuzzy memory assaulted him at his doorway. _

_Sasuke took care of him after his own first tango with alcohol freshman year. He was hanging __out at a party with a bottle of vodka, and the next thing he remembered was waking up in his dorm, in his fuzzy jammies with a bottle of Gator-aid at his bedside and a screaming headache. _

_It's not like sleeping in jeans was the worst thing in the world, but for god's sake he _threw-up _on Sasuke that night. Helping his roommate into a pair of pyjamas was the least he could do. _

_ He turned to his flatmate with renewed determination, but his hands hesitated at the hem of his shirt. He felt his skin heat into an undeniable blush, even as Sasuke snored softly into his pillows. Geez, had Sasuke felt this awkward helping him change? Probably not. Naruto was reasonably certain that awkward was not in the Uchiha vocabulary._

_ He took a deep breath and yanked on the shirt. _

_Sasuke stirred. Sitting up slightly, he bonelessly flailed in an effort to rid himself of the uncomfortable netting that was pressing circles into his skin. _

_Naruto felt giggles blossom in his chest again, feeling much less awkward. He discarded the offending material over his shoulder, but his giggle suddenly turned into an undignified squawk. You see, at some point, Sasuke's head had crashed into one broad, tan shoulder, and just as Naruto had reached down to fumble with the button of his jeans, Sasuke started mumbling something unintelligible against the hot flesh of his neck. As if that wasn't bad enough, he was almost certain that he felt the brush of _teeth_ against his pulse._

Naruto blushed so hard that it felt like his fingernails were on too tight. He refused to look at his drooling flatmate.

Nothing happened. He'd hurried Sasuke into his sweats, but he couldn't tell if that sudden jolt to his spine had been terror or excitement – or both.

He pressed the palms of his hands into his eyes. He so did not have time for a sexuality crisis right now.

Surprisingly, he _had_ actually thought about his sexuality before, albeit briefly. It was a confusing time in Junior High – he was left with no one. He met this very angry boy in the hospital, who almost made him forget about Sasuke – about all the other people he felt betrayed him. He was pretty sure, sometime after they stopped attempting to beat the crap out of each other every time they were in the same room, that the fiery kid wanted to throw him against the nearest flat surface and… Naruto wrinkled his nose. Well, that was the thing. Naruto never got past that 'and,' and he couldn't say he wanted to.

_And_ anyway, he really wasn't going there now. Becoming the fifteen- thousandth notch in Uchiha Sasuke's bedpost was not the way he wanted to end their friendship, so there was no real reason to go _there_ in the first place – wherever there was.

Crisis averted.

He looked down at his friend, currently fast asleep in his arms. Asleep, Sasuke looked so – normal? He frowned. Without his tough, scowly façade, Sasuke looked downright vulnerable.

In the end, Naruto didn't really care if Sasuke was gay, or straight, or into vacuum cleaners. Sasuke was Sasuke, whomever he was sleeping with. Well, that wasn't entirely true. Naruto did _not_ like the idea of his little Sasuke with that large, terrifying redhead. His arms tightened involuntarily around his flatmate.

What really bothered him was that Sasuke didn't _tell_ him he was gay. God, he told that asswipe _everything_ about his life – every stupid, insignificant detail. Then, Sasuke felt he couldn't even trust him…

Naruto's frown deepened. He must have been a worse friend than he thought. He felt a lump swelling in his throat. His eyes were aching.

Sasuke stirred. His eyes opened slowly. He jerked suddenly, apparently noticing that there was another occupant in his bed. The confusion faded to recognition, then he collapsed again on top of Naruto.

"Oh. Eww." He muttered, wiping the drool off of his face.

Naruto snorted, burying his fingers in Sasuke's messy head.

"You were snuggly last night." The blond teased. "Any particular reason why you refused to let me go sleep in my own room?"

"You were crying, dumbass."

Naruto could feel a blush rising up to his cheeks. Of course the asshole's perfect memory would also extend to when he was under the influence.

_"Not cool, man." Naruto whined, gently pulling Sasuke away from his neck by his shoulders. _

_ Sasuke, for his part, looked completely unfazed. Although to be clear, he looked like he was about two and a half seconds from returning to his alcohol-induced coma._

_ As quickly as possible, Naruto pulled Sasuke's faded Uchiha T-shirt over his head and let Sasuke collapse backwards into his stack of pillows. He returned to the jeans, avoiding certain bits of his flatmate's anatomy with surgical precision. Satisfied with his work, he tugged the jeans from Sasuke's lifeless legs by the ankles. _

_He could have seen the error of this manoeuvre sooner, and thinking on it later, he blamed it on the alcohol for his lack of foresight, but as he was yanking on Sasuke's trousers, the denim caught on his boxer-briefs and they slid down past his hips._

_ Naruto squeaked. Thankful Sasuke wasn't cognizant enough to hear that, and abandoning the jeans at the bottom of the bed, he hastily returned Sasuke's underpants to their upright and locked __position. His sigh of relief died in his throat when he saw them._

_ Bruises. Lots of them. Stripes almost. Beginning from a sick green and darkening by the second. _

_ Frowning, he examined Sasuke's body more thoroughly. Handprints, it dawned on him, and the realisation almost made him sick to his stomach. _

_Naruto held up his hands. The prints were much larger than his own, and it was clear from the darkest, ugliest lines around his hips how these bruises came to be. Somebody – some incredibly large and strong body – had been gripping Sasuke's hips hard enough to hurt him. _

_Naruto sat back on his heels and choked. Sure, he figured out that Sasuke was sleeping with that big dude, but he hadn't actually imagined the mechanics of it. He hadn't expected to see the manifestations of Sasuke's evening written so plainly on his hips… on his wrists… snaking up his torso. Naruto wanted to vomit._

_It was the mental picture. The idea. The very thought that someone was using his most precious person's body as a mere object of gratification that made Naruto's body shudder with sobs. _

_Naruto wasn't one to demonise sexual fantasy, BDSM partnerships, or what have you, but something about _Sasuke_, proud, uptight Uchiha Sasuke, submitting to abuse screamed something afoul. Glancing into Sasuke's glassy eyes, Naruto couldn't help but wonder exactly how lucid Sasuke had been when these bruises were made._

_Naruto found that his tears were dripping steadfastly onto Sasuke's bedspread. He inhaled sharply, trying to steady his sobs. _

_This place in Sasuke's heart – the black, macabre pit he had been hiding since that ugly day in November more than fifteen years ago – remained deeper than Naruto ever imagined._

Naruto shook his head, attempting to physically clear his dark thoughts.

"Yeah, well… I'm an emotional drunk." He remained vague.

Sasuke looked up, regarding him carefully.

"Are you OK?" He asked after several moments.

"Yeah, a little hung over."

He knew that wasn't what Sasuke was asking, but he hoped he'd let it slip.

Sasuke gave a pathetic little effort to open the top drawer of his bedside table. After some rummaging, he produced a water bottle and aspirin. He tossed it weakly in the blond's direction before flopping – quite gracefully actually – back on his bed.

Naruto sighed thickly, though thankful for the splash of water against his parched throat. Whiskey was not for armatures, he decided.

Still, somewhere lodged in a brighter corner of Sasuke's heart remained a little space for him, and no matter how much it hurt to see the depth of Sasuke's darkness, the thought could still bring a smile to his face.

_"_Dobei_." Sasuke whispered, as Naruto leaned over him to finish pulling up his flannel pants. _

_A nickname from years ago, when Sasuke hardly spoke any English. He'd asked the jerk-face's older brother what it meant, and kept bugging him relentlessly until the boy taught him a whole slew of his own Japanese insults to throw at the pint-sized bastard – most of which he mispronounced. _

"Dobe_." Sasuke repeated, with more force and clarity. _

_Naruto's eyes trailed reluctantly to murky black. _

_ A pale, unsteady hand reached upward, wiping the tears from the scars on his face._

_ Naruto still couldn't remember how it happened, but he found himself trapped in Sasuke's iron grip. _

_ "Don't cry, dumbass." Sasuke slurred._

"Was it Sakura?" Sasuke asked, finally, disturbing Naruto's thoughts and his slow, rhythmic breathing.

"No." Naruto answered honestly. "Well… also yes. I don't know. Things are… awkward."

Naruto worried on his lip. He could feel the metallic taste of blood seeping into his mouth.

"What I said…" Sasuke trailed off. "The other day…"

If he'd been feeling better, Naruto might have snorted. This was probably the closest thing he would ever get to an apology out of the asshole.

"You were right." Naruto let his head fall heavily against the headboard. "Well, Sakura's not a whore, but she was clearly jealous."

"Fuck." Naruto said after a moment of silence. "She's even jealous of me."

Sasuke folded his legs beneath him, resting his head against the wall.

"And you're OK with that?" He asked.

Typical, hard-hitting Sasuke.

Naruto closed his eyes, sighing deeply.

"No." He murmured. "I do trust her…" Naruto scratched his head against the headboard. "But I'm not sure it's supposed to be like this."

Sasuke stared blankly ahead. Naruto wasn't sure if he was silent because he didn't know what to say or if he was just being Sasuke.

Naruto continued to chew on his lip. Who was he kidding? It wasn't Sakura that was upsetting him right now. His stomach churned, though wasn't sure if it was caused more by his hangover or the impending confrontation.

"Hey Sasuke…" He began.

Why the fuck should _he_ be nervous about this?

"Why didn't you…" He paused.

Sasuke raised his eyebrows. Naruto could feel his heart quickening in his chest.

Well fuck it.

"That guy last night." Naruto began again. "Is he like your boyfriend or something?"

Sasuke's face drained of the little colour it had.

"What are you…"

"Oh come off it, S'uke." Naruto interrupted. "I may be dumb, but I'm not completely oblivious. I did live with my gay maths teacher and his partner, afterall."

Sasuke mutely looked at his lap.

Naruto could feel that lump reforming in his throat. It was making it difficult to breathe. He reached for Sasuke's slim shoulder, crossing his legs beneath him.

"Why didn't you tell me you were into guys?" He frowned. He could feel the wrinkle between his eyebrows deepening. "Do you really think I'd care?"

Sasuke shrugged. "It's not like I was hiding it… it just never came up."

Naruto was not impressed.

"It's not a big deal. I never told you my blood type either."

"Your blood type is AB."

A pair of black eyes blinked.

"When you were in the hospital in Tokyo, after you…" Naruto swallowed. "They weren't sure they could find AB blood. They had to use Itachi's."

Sasuke sighed. "Look, I just have never been with anyone important enough to tell you about… male or female."

"So this guy…"

"It's casual."

Naruto hummed, but even he could hear the disapproval in his voice.

"What the fuck, Naruto." Sasuke sneered, suddenly on the defensive. "You thought it was hot when it was with a girl."

"I thought it was hot, asshole, before I knew it was with someone capable of hurting you."

"Juugo would not hurt me." The ice crept steadily into his voice.

"Oh Please." Naruto bit. "He already has."

Sasuke shot him an angry, sceptical glare.

"Have you seen yourself?" Naruto accused. "You've got split lip, you're covered in bruises…"

"Maybe I like it rough." Sasuke snapped, interrupting, but Naruto hardly heard him.

"And don't even get me started on those drugs he's been giving you."

Naruto leaned forward into Sasuke's face. He knew his worry was coming out as anger, but he couldn't hold the tone of his voice. His flatmate shrunk back against the wall, clearly avoiding touching any part of him.

"He is not forcing me to do anything, Uzumaki. I'm an adult and I can make my own decisions about my sex life and choice of substance."

"So, tell me you haven't been using more since you've been seeing him." Naruto demanded.

Sasuke chewed on the inside of his cheek.

"And I googled rolling. What the fuck? You're doing ecstasy?"

"I get it Naruto." Sasuke retorted sourly. "You're the perfect human being and I'm the fuck up. Go ahead and judge me. It doesn't change anything."

"I'm not judging you asswipe! I'd never white knight on substance use. I've been known to drink myself stupid on occasion, and while it's not my thing, I'm not opposed to a little recreational marijuana. But ecstasy is serious shit, Sasuke. Not to mention all those other party drugs out there. Are you on those, too? Cocaine? Meth? LSD? Do you know how bad for you…"

Enraged Sasuke flew to his knees, meeting Naruto nose to nose.

"Since when is it any of your goddamn business anyway?" He interrupted.

"The fuck, I'm worried about you."

"Yeah, well you haven't taken any interest in my social life since you and Sakura started dating. You don't get to suddenly give a shit when she's about to dump your sorry ass. It doesn't work that way!"

Naruto deflated. He felt the sour trickle of shame dripping into his stomach.

Sasuke, for his part, looked a little horrified to have taken it that far, but he wasn't backing down. His arms crossed defiantly and Naruto couldn't decide if he looked more heartbroken or furious.

"You're right, Sasuke." Naruto sank back into the bed, hugging his knees to his chest. "I've been a shitty friend."

That appeared to surprise his flatmate. His arms dropped to his sides.

"I know I've been a shitty friend." Naruto choked on a wave of tears that was threatening to fall. "But here's the thing. You didn't see yourself when I found you in Roppongi. You were so strung out you didn't know who I was. Fuck, you didn't even know who _you_ were..."

Naruto paused, struggling to form all his heartache into words.

"You. Almost. Died."

Naruto lost his battle against his tears, and he buried his face in his knees.

"I'm just worried about you." He breathed. "I'm losing Sakura. But not you. I can't lose you."

A heavy sigh sounded from across the bed. He felt a soft pressure on his shoulder before being pulled into a pair of warm arms. He buried his nose in Sasuke shoulder. He smelt even worse than he did the night before, but Naruto didn't care. He wiped his nose on Sasuke's clothed shoulder. He figured it was payback for the drool.

"It's not like before." Sasuke reassured him, his voice a low rumble against his body. "I was so unhappy. I think I was trying to kill myself."

"I'm so sorry, Sasuke." He mumbled into his flatmate's smelly shirt. "I'll be a better friend, I promise. I do care about you."

Sasuke exhaled through his long, slender nose, his heart simply aching.

'I love you, too.' He mouthed, unheard, against Naruto's temple.

The man was trembling ever so slightly in his arms, so much still the child he met some nineteen odd years ago. He couldn't stay mad at Naruto. He never could. Hell, he wasn't even sure he was ever actually mad at him in the first place. He brushed his fingers through shaggy blond locks, remarkably tangle-free.

For better or worse, everything was in the open now. Sasuke had lied through his teeth at one point, though. He really did seek Naruto's approval, desperately. A little bubble of euphoria burst inside his throat at the thought that Naruto was worried about him – that he wouldn't send him away after discovering the more sordid details of his private life. He always knew, somewhere inside that twisted brain of his, that Naruto's unconditional love, however undeserved at times, wouldn't falter for something like this. Yet, there had lingered a remaining coal of doubt, fanned by Naruto's obsession with his girlfriend.

One worry remained, tucked between his stomach and his gut. If Naruto ever understood the depth of his feelings for him… would he send him away? Naruto would probably, with his unfailing devotion, find a way to make their friendship OK again, but Sasuke wasn't sure he could stand the rejection.

Naruto's silent sobs turned to sniffles and Sasuke clutched him tighter to his body.

"You're not a bad friend, Naruto." Sasuke fiddled with one blond strand, curling it around his finger. "I didn't tell you I was gay, because I'm not even sure I am really _gay_, per se. I never really gave it much thought. I just… do what feels right, when it feels right…"

Naruto pulled away, his wide blue eyes danced with such intensity that Sasuke had to look away.

"I trust you, Sasuke." He commented, his voice a low hum in the all but silent room. "I know you aren't an addict, and I'm sure you do what you do in a controlled environment around people you trust."

Sasuke nodded, allowing Naruto to draw his gaze back down into his bright eyes.

"But that stuff's not good for your body. I don't judge you, I never would. I just worry about you."

Sasuke averted his eyes again, but Naruto sat up in his arms, and Sasuke could feel the heat of his hangover-addled forehead pressing heavy against his own. His pulse was rising in his throat, and he had a sneaking suspicion that his unsettled stomach had very little to do with the alcohol consumption the night before.

Naruto continued, "I don't care about the sex, or gender, or what have you, of who you choose to sleep with, or who you choose to love."

The last bit was whispered, and Sasuke's heart did a little flip of its own volition.

"I am, however…" Naruto paused as though weighing his words, "I am a little concerned about this Juugo guy."

"Juugo's a good person." Sasuke defended. "He brought me home, didn't he?"

Naruto pulled away, cocking his head gently to the side. "I'm sure he's got a good heart, but he looks like a ticking time-bomb. I just don't want you to be around when it goes off."

"I'm not helpless, dumbass."

"I know that asswipe, but he's a big dude." Naruto defended. "Look, I'm not trying to go 'psychoanalyst bullshit' on you, but he just… he doesn't look well."

Sasuke gave him a sceptical look, patently ignoring the fact that Naruto was probably right. Juugo did have a bit of a reputation for instability.

"He's probably facing a kind of imbalance that needs medication. That doesn't make him a bad person, but it makes being in a relationship with him complicated, especially if his illness isn't being managed."

Sasuke drew away, wrinkling his brow. So much for no psychoanalysing.

"I'm not saying don't get involved with him, I'm just suggesting that you think about this seriously before you continue to pursue intimacy."

"Intimacy?" Sasuke sputtered. "Idiot, I'm not starting a relationship with this guy. How many times do I have to tell you 'it's casual' before you believe me?"

"Is he aware of this?"

OK. Now, psychologist mode was beginning to piss Sasuke off.

"Why wouldn't he be?"

As though Sasuke didn't know how to maintain a casual, physical connection.

Naruto seemed to know he was pushing too hard. He worried his lip and poked Sasuke playfully in the hip.

"It's just... well… last night when I touched you, he looked like he wanted to rip my arm off… And I'm actually pretty sure he could." Naruto added, after near-visible ellipses.

Sasuke blinked, not entirely sure what to do with this information.

"Juugo hooks up with a different person every weekend. Why would he suddenly become jealous about me?"

"You're special, S'uke." Naruto's warm fingers trailed down Sasuke's hip, leaving a tingling sensation in their wake. "And don't act like you don't know it, you arrogant ass."

Sasuke was unable to stop the snort that tumbled ungracefully from his nose.

"OK, dumbass. I'll be careful."

He rested his nose on Naruto's shoulder, feeling a satisfied hum rumbling against his chest.

Sasuke didn't much experience in the friend department, but he seriously doubted that this copious amount of cuddling was normal between sober, male friends – even for a touchy-feely guy like Naruto. In fact, the very thought of Naruto snuggling with that shaggy bartender friend of his, almost made Sasuke snicker into Naruto's neck. He cherished this little place he'd found in Naruto's heart, and if he ever felt special, it was for this. It made him feel warm and safe, and let live the tiny ember of hope that someday, Naruto could love him back.

He exhaled deeply, enjoying this moment of peace while it lasted.

"Hey, Sasuke?"

Sasuke pinched back his smirk. He knew Naruto wouldn't be able to sit still for much longer.

"I'm hungry. Wanna make breakfast?" He asked innocently.

Sasuke snorted. "Yeah, sure. Whatever, idiot."

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Notes: <strong>So let me know what you think of the changes. Chapter five will be out soon :)


	5. Chapter 5

**Author's Note:** Yay! New content! Finally. :)

Happy almost New Year's everyone! I hope everyone is having a happy and safe holiday. I'll try to keep to regular updates for as long as I'm able. Chapter six is written, though it needs some revision. You can expect it to be up next week.

Enjoy!

* * *

><p>Chapter Five:<p>

Gloomy Wednesday. Uchiha Sasuke peered out the sad excuse his office called a window. The snow from the previous week had melted into an ugly black and grey slush – the kind that crept inside your socks and hung out between your toes all day. Sasuke inched his icy feet closer to the space heater he kept under his desk, noticing that his office-mate, a fellow MBA student by the name of Neji, was eyeing his heater with his pale eyes full of jealousy.

His phone vibrated on his desk, and he hit ignore for the twentieth-something odd time.

"That's good, Tatsuki." Sasuke praised, looking over his student's assignment. "I honestly don't think you could be better prepared for your first midterm."

Tatsuki leaned forward. "But the question about Austria." He pointed to a spot on his paper. "My answer is different from the answer in the back of the book."

Sasuke scrunched his nose, examining the problem more closely. After several moments, he circled part of the equation with his pen.

"It's just an algebra mistake."

"Ah crap." The kid muttered, working back through the problem. "I haven't taken algebra since high school."

"In the end," Sasuke commented as Tatsuki scratched away at his paper, "if you invert the ratio for demand deposit money and total money, you'll get a much simpler algebraic equation to solve."

He tapped on part of his student's solution.

"I will give you the simplified equation on the exam. The problem about Austria is just to see if you are able to derive it yourself. We'll go over it today in class. Regardless, the exam won't be so difficult."

Tatsuki nodded, leaning over his answer until his head bumped slightly with Sasuke's.

He jerked back, blushing. "I'm sorry professor, I'm such a klutz!" He apologised.

Sasuke pinched back a smirk. It must be his destiny to encounter idiots all day.

His phone vibrated again. For the love of all things holy!

"Maybe you should get that." Tatsuki suggested. "It sounds important."

A close up of Suigestu's stupid face flashed across the screen.

"I doubt it." Sasuke muttered, but swiped his finger down the screen regardless.

"What." Sasuke demanded.

"Hey! Are you busy?"

"If I weren't busy, I would have answered one of the first five thousand times that you called. What do you want?"

"Come over for dinner and a movie?" Suigetsu asked sweetly.

"No."

"Why not?" The other man whined.

"I have class in the morning, dumbass."

Sasuke's eyes widened at his student's surprised little snort. Way to be professional, Uchiha.

"No drugs, limited boozing. We've just downloaded the Rocky series… come on you know you wanna." The other man encouraged, humming the Rocky III theme song under his breath.

"No." Sasuke repeated.

"I'll pester you until you do…" He taunted.

Sasuke pinched the bridge of his nose. "Fine, but I'm not staying for all six."

"Great!" Suigetsu cheered. "We'll have something to watch next week!"

Sasuke pressed end, just in time to hear Suigetsu call out "Be there at seven!"

"I apologise." Sasuke said stiffly to his smirking student. "My friends can be a little invasive."

"No worries." Tatsuki replied easily, whipping out his phone. "It's about time for class anyway."

Sasuke nodded and began gathering his things.

"If you don't mind me asking," Tatsuki began, motioning to the single picture on Sasuke's desk, "Who is this?"

That particular photo depicted Sasuke and Naruto shortly after his return from Japan. He had invited Naruto to crash his brother's stuffy birthday bash. Naruto's grinning face flashed in front of the camera with his arm slung around a vaguely amused Sasuke.

Sasuke cocked his head. It had been a while since he really looked at the picture, and the two boys smiling back at him were hardly recognisable. Naruto had just shot up like a bean sprout, but his body hadn't yet put on what became his now characteristic musculature. He was tall and lanky, and his shirt was several inches too short for his long, gangly arms. Sasuke too was painstakingly thin, as though his skin were stretched as tightly as possible across his high cheekbones. It would take some time before the deep smudges under his eyes would fade, evidence of the complicated years prior, but nevertheless, Sasuke looked happy.

Sasuke suppressed a warm smile at the memory. Right before this photo was taken, Naruto had launched dozens of stink bombs in all of the Uchiha bathrooms. They reeked for weeks to follow, but the expression on his brother's face at the party had totally been worth doing your business sans oxygen. In fact, if you knew where to look, you could see him glowering in the background.

"Is he… your boyfriend?" Tatsuki asked carefully.

Sasuke's eyebrows disappeared into his hairline, and his office-mate let out and undignified snort.

The Uchiha shot the light-eyed man an annoyed glare.

"No." He stated at the very same moment as the other man said, "Yes."

"I'm sorry if it's awkward." His student stammered. "I just figured he had to be important to you. You don't seem like the type of guy to keep personal stuff around…"

"It's not awkward." He assured the younger man. "And he's _not_ my boyfriend."

The other grad student stretched almost lazily from behind his laptop. He twisted his long, black hair into a ponytail.

"You keep telling yourself that, Uchiha." He goaded. Turning to Tatsuki he added, "If you keep coming to office hours you'll see what I mean. Naruto's in here almost as often as I am."

Tatsuki raised his eyebrows. Throwing a sceptical look at his own TA.

"It's like they have their own little universe when they're together. They get all starry-eyed, and it's like no one else exists." Neji continued.

Sasuke huffed, feeling a bit ruffled.

"They can have entire conversations just by trading insults. No one else knows what they're going on about. It's freaky." He finished with a shrug.

Sasuke rolled his eyes, slinging his bag over his shoulder.

"He's most certainly _not_ my boyfriend." Sasuke repeated, heading out the door. "He's my flatmate."

"Don't forget to tell your sweetie you won't be home tonight!" Neji teased as they left the office.

Sasuke flipped him the bird, but did slide his phone out of his pocket as soon as they turned the corner, composing a brief text as they went.

"Aren't flatmates kind of an undergrad thing?" His student asked, hesitation still evident in his voice.

Sasuke just shrugged as they entered the near full classroom. "I guess I never thought about it."

He dropped his bag on the desk.

"Good evening class," he began. "Don't forget to respond to the doodle about the snow day make-up class."

He plugged his USB key into the computer.

"Attendance is, of course, not mandatory, and I will post a recording of my lecture on blackboard, but if no one is going to show up, I'll give the lecture from home in my underwear."

"Mr. Uchiha." A pretty girl with smart violet eyes raised her hand. "In that case, can we just agree to meet at your house anyway?"

Sasuke smirked at his class' laughter.

"Not likely Koyuki." He twirled his dry-erase marked between his fingers. "Now, about your homework. Who has questions about the Austria problem?"

* * *

><p>Seven-thirty found Sasuke in the produce aisle, carefully inspecting the meagre winter avocado display. He was tense; his face felt twitchy. He gently squeezed his seventh avocado, lips pressed together in grim concentration, determined to complete guacamole-duty with the utmost perfection.<p>

Karin and Suigetsu stood in front of the tomatoes, arguing loudly enough for the entire store to hear, over whether to make pico-de-gallo or salsa.

"Why don't you make both?" A timid voice suggested from just over Sasuke's shoulder.

Despite the softness of the voice in question, Sasuke flinched, nearly dropping a lacklustre avocado in the process.

Juugo's lips pressed into a tight frown and he shot Sasuke a look of concern.

The Uchiha shrugged and muttered some lame excuse about agoraphobia, though Juugo did not appear to be terribly impressed. Sasuke saw his large, ruddy fists tightening at his sides.

A double-date. The very concept set Sasuke's teeth on edge. His friends, he suspected, in a misplaced attempt to help him find contentment in life, had engineered this casual date-night with neither his nor Juugo's consent.

Juugo's place in his life was somewhere, ramming his cock between his thighs, pressing Sasuke's face into the mattress, door, or whatever flat surface they could find, not standing next to him, perusing produce at the local supermarket.

The large, brawny man seemed a bit out of his element as well, chewing on his lip, and Sasuke prayed to all things holy that the uncharacteristically meek expression he wore on his face was, in fact, not an indication that Naruto had been correct in his assessment of Juugo's attachment to him.

At last, Sasuke selected a small collection of avocados. He nudged Juugo in the direction of an argument that had just erupted several aisles over.

"We'd better supervise them before we get thrown out." He muttered, rolling his eyes.

His bright haired companion gave him a kind smile and led the way.

Sasuke exhaled deeply as the other man's penetrating gaze left his face. His eyes swept the store for familiar faces – or one in particular.

His heart leapt into his throat for a moment as he caught a shock of blond hair rounding a corner. He exhaled again – just a random skinny, blond teenager.

He shook himself silently, steeling his nerves. This was stupid. There was no reason for Naruto to visit the supermarket tonight, even if it was the closest one to their apartment. Besides, why should he even care if Naruto saw him out with Juugo, it's not like he didn't know what was going on between them.

"Are you sure you're alright, Sasuke?" The man in question asked, patent concern in his voice.

Sasuke nodded and tried to look reassuring.

"It'll be better when we get back to the apartment." He promised.

* * *

><p>Sasuke did, in fact, feel considerably better once they returned to Karin and Suigetsu's small, studio apartment. That was, especially after Karin banished Suigetsu from the kitchenette for being an idiot, and began flirting unabashed with the little Uchiha, as though Suigetsu wasn't but ten feet away muttering into the mint he was smashing. Dinner wasn't half bad either. He and Juugo both ate in relative silence as Karin and Suigetsu's constant bickering monopolised the conversation.<p>

It wasn't until Suigetsu tugged on the futon, pulling out the bottom to better accommodate their company, that Sasuke began to panic. On a trusty old futon made for two-and a half, four people could hardly fit comfortably without a good deal of cuddling. He quickly downed his second mojito.

Juugo seemed hardly disturbed, settling back against the cushion with a contented sigh. Karin rested against her boyfriend, reaching up for an endearing smooch on his neck. Suigestu's arms snaked around her thin frame.

Sasuke eyed the pitcher of mojitos, cursing his nine AM lecture with a dramatic sigh. Ignoring his desire to get wasted beyond all comprehension, Sasuke gracefully slipped between Juugo's outstretched legs. He would never let a little awkwardness get in the way of his perfect attendance. The larger man didn't hesitate to pull a blanket over the two of them as the opening credits began to roll. Sasuke forced himself to relax, leaning back against a warm, solid chest. This feat was complicated, however, as he felt Juugo's nose against his jugular. He shivered, and Juugo, apparently mistaking his discomfort for pleasure, wrapped his burning hands around his hips.

Relax. Sasuke thought. It was just a stupid movie. He tried to bury himself in Sly's personal struggles. Something about a girl… Boxing… Monosyllabic responses… He could at least identify with that.

He was interrupted from his musings roughly two plot points later as he felt Juugo's teeth brush dangerously against his pulse. Sasuke leaned back and cocked his head upwards, questioning. Juugo's eyes remained trained on the movie, even as his hands inched inside Sasuke's jeans. He caught the playful little smirk Juugo was trying to mask and rolled his eyes, feeling truly relaxed for the first time that evening. As his evening drifted into familiar territory, he felt the tension melting from his muscles. Sex he could do. He shifted his hips against Juugo's feeling the obvious stirrings between the larger man's legs. His own excitement peaked in response.

Juugo rubbed and pulled and teased, gently coaxing Sasuke into a frustrated arousal. There wasn't so much they could do sitting next to Karin and Suigetsu – without asking them to join, that was. And though the teasing gradually subsided as the movie progressed, until the broad hands against his stomach had all but stilled, merely fixing Sasuke tight against a warm, safe body, Sasuke barely noticed. He felt his eyes grow heavy and allowed his head to lull into the other man with a contented sigh. As he drifted into a semi-sleep, eyes closed, aware only of the warmth that surrounded him, he felt a brush of stubble against his cheek and his heart fluttered. His lips curled involuntarily. Uchiha Sasuke was, momentarily at least, happy.

* * *

><p>Sasuke was gone.<p>

Thirteen year-old Naruto stared ahead at the blackboard, deaf to his teacher's words.

_"Keep your little, piece of shit hands to yourself!"_ Sasuke bit, dark eyes glazed with hatred.

Gone.

Naruto's hands were shaking. He gripped his pencil tighter, cursing when it snapped in his fingers.

_"You really think you can keep me from leaving? You?!"_

Naruto's dull eyes trailed to the empty seat next to his. For three whole days, Sasuke had been gone.

_"You're not my brother. You don't even know what family means."_

He sighed, feeling his eyes burn. He stared at the paper in front of him, willing the tears not to fall. That was all he needed: one more reason for the kids to taunt him.

_"You're nothing to me!"_

"Naruto… Naruto!" His eyes snapped to his teacher. "Care to join us?"

The class laughed, bitter, mocking in his ears.

"I'm sorry Mr. Umino." He mumbled.

Great, way to piss off his favourite teacher.

"I'm not feeling well, can I go to the nurse?" He asked.

He watched his teacher's wide brown eyes grow soft.

"Sure, Naruto." He reached into the top drawer of his desk. "I'll write you a pass."

"Ickle Naruto-kins doesn't feel good cause his _boyfriend's_ gone."

A voice behind him muttered under his breath.

"Uchiha break your heart?" Another voice taunted in a whisper.

Naruto stood, holding his head high. He didn't see the foot that snaked into the aisle. He tripped into another student's desk, hitting his hip hard on the way down.

"Get off me, faggot!" The boy snarled.

Naruto scrambled to his feet to myriad of snickers. Fuck. Sakura was in this class. He didn't dare look at her.

"That's quite enough, Bekko!" Mr. Umino snapped. "I do not tolerate such language in my classroom!

"It's not my fault the little homo was trying to hump me!"

The snickers turned into full-blown laughter. Naruto felt his ears burn.

"I'm quite certain Naruto has better taste than that." The teacher quipped. "You may sign your detention slip after class."

"I'll get you for that, faggot." The boy growled under his breath.

Naruto trudged to the front of the classroom, snagging the hall pass without meeting his teacher's eye.

"Naruto, wait!" The man called as he was making his way down the hallway.

He turned, his eyes on the floor as the man clicked the door shut behind him.

"I see you have a black eye." He said bluntly.

"I'm clumsy." Was Naruto's flat response.

The man clicked his tongue in irritation.

"Look, I know what you're getting at, Mr. Umino." He sighed deeply. "I appreciate you trying to help, but whatever you try to do with them." Naruto inclined his head toward the door. "Will only make it that much worse.

"No one is bullied in my class, Naruto."

Naruto studied the chipped blue paint on the lockers.

"Maybe you should see your guidance counsellor." Mr. Umino suggested. "Talk it out."

Naruto snorted. "Please. Dr. Hatake hates me more than all my classmates combined."

"I'm sure that's not true! Dr. Hatake really cares about his students."

"I think I'm aware of what it feels like to be hated." Naruto's voice was bitter. "He hasn't looked me in the face once. I've been in his office a dozen times since I started middle school."

"That doesn't sound right…" The teacher trailed off.

"Whatever." Naruto responded. "Can I go now?"

The man sighed again. "Go on. Come by at lunch time and we'll go over what you missed."

Naruto trekked down the hallway, counting the tiles on the floor as he went. Anything to keep his mind off of… He wouldn't think it. _He wouldn't_.

"_You want to know why you're alone, dumbass?_" Sasuke's voice was filled with malice. "_Because you always insert yourself where you're not wanted._"

No! No! No! The corridor began to swim in front of him, growing infinitely long.

"_You're so damn clingy._"

He turned at the stairs and paused. Trying to clear his head.

In his mind, he could feel Sasuke yanking him up by his collar, and shoving him into the wall behind him. Naruto was so small. Sasuke's knuckles pressed against his windpipe, he couldn't breathe.

"_No one wants you around, Uzumaki. Not me. Not Sakura. Not anyone._"

The blow came out of nowhere, slamming into the side of his face. His head ricocheted against the wall, as pain exploded behind his eyes. A square-faced boy laughed as Naruto turned. Shocked.

He could no longer distinguish memory from reality. A shove sent him tumbling down the stairs. The kicks raining into his body – was that Sasuke? Or was that now? He curled into the foetal position as a cruel laugh echoed in his ears.

"The stupid queer can't even fight back."

"_You disgust me._"

"Get up, you little poof!"

"_You are nothing to me_."

"He's crying! Holy fuck! You really are a fag!"

Naruto couldn't say how long the attack lasted. It could have gone on for days, for all he knew. It didn't matter anyway. No one could hurt him as badly as Sasuke. No cruel jabs cut him as deeply, no bruises bled as black.

Eventually, the laughter retreated. Naruto picked himself up to inspect the damage. His lip was bleeding, and he could feel bruises forming all over his body. At least the nurse would let him go home – assuming Jiraiya was awake and sober enough to answer the phone, that was.

"_You're not wanted, you nasty faggot_."

With a heavy heart he dragged himself to the nurse.

"_I hope I never see you again._"

No, nobody could hurt him quite like Sasuke had. Because the taunts they threw at him vanished nearly as quickly as their echo faded from the hallway – Sasuke's words would never truly disappear.

* * *

><p>Contentment, Sasuke decided, was a drug – the worst kind of drug – and now, as he sat, empty and sated on his couch in the aftermath of sex, he felt the crushing depths that always followed such a high.<p>

After the movie, Juugo followed him home on the pretences of engaging in an only mildly illegal activity – file sharing – because, well, you know, Juugo's internet was really slow, and he actually did like the Rocky Soundtrack, (which Sasuke only had because Naruto thought he needed some encouraging music on his laptop, not that he'd tell Juugo that).

It was a farce. They wanted to go back to Sasuke's apartment and screw like bunnies. They both knew it, but that wasn't the point.

Everything went according to plan, at first. Sasuke didn't even bother flipping on the light. He closed his bedroom door with a confident snap, and without hesitation reached for Juugo's belt. The other man's lips crashed desperately against his own.

He should have known. In retrospect, it should have been clear that the weird, intimate ambiance of that evening wouldn't evaporate with their clothing. Even if that hadn't been obvious, Juugo's feather-light kisses brushing against the column of his neck should have sounded enough bells in his brain to convince him send the man on his way. Juugo and he didn't do gentle – they did i_teeth_.i

However, Sasuke was lost in the moment – lost somewhere between their lingering kisses and beating hearts. It felt so good to move together like this, legs twisted together, bodies undulating in tandem. It felt so right. His blunt fingers kneaded the corded muscles of Juugo's back. Only sighs, shudders and the rhythmic rustling of fabric echoed in the inky black room. He just _felt_. Juugo was pressed so deeply inside him, Sasuke thought he might break. It was his name, whispered like a prayer against his temple sent his body skittering over the edge. He came, cradled against a broad chest, just as he felt Juugo fill the condom inside him, riding out his own pleasure with the gentle rocking of his hips.

The click of the lamp broke the spell.

Sasuke scrounged around for his clothes, the light stretching across his nude form made him feel suddenly vulnerable.

"Do you…" Sasuke's stilled the tremor in his voice, as he pulled on a comfortable pair of grey sleeping sweats. "Do you actually want the soundtrack?"

Juugo shrugged. "Why not?"

He offered Sasuke a shy, awkward smile.

Awkward was right, Sasuke thought, drumming his fingers on his keyboard as his laptop roared to life. He could hear Juugo getting dressed behind him.

He turned, feeling a bit like an asshole – and actually caring for once.

"You know, you don't have to go." He offered, not entirely sure he wanted to share his bed any longer.

Black eyes shifted to his naked toes. "It's cold and late…" He mumbled.

Juugo gave him a real smile, albeit a bit indulgent.

"It's OK, pretty boy." He teased.

Sasuke didn't know if he was relieved or disappointed.

"I have to work in the morning, too." Juugo explained.

Sasuke had never given so much as a thought to Juugo's life outside the club. He considered asking. Instead he rooted around in his desk for an extra USB key.

He was interrupted only by a very loud purr. Sasuke startled, snapping around in his chair.

"That's incredible." He commented.

Sasuke's fat, devil-cat purred ruthlessly around Juugo's ankles. The man squatted and scratched her fuzzy face.

"Yugi-chan is a bit high maintenance." Sasuke admitted.

Juugo smirked, mumbling something about pets taking after their owners.

Sasuke shot him a flat glare.

"Seriously." He continued, shocked that the cat exposed part of her shaggy underside. "She doesn't even do that for Naruto."

It wasn't often that Sasuke wished he could take back his words. He didn't generally say much, and any misspeaking on his part was even more rare. He did, however, regret mentioning his flatmate.

Juugo's hand stilled on the cat's belly. Sasuke could almost feel his aura flicker. Yugi skirted away and plopped gracelessly on her owner's lap.

"I see." He stated simply.

Sasuke turned away, a bit regretful, but thoroughly annoyed. His feelings for his chipper best friend were no one's business but his own. If Juugo wanted to hang around, he was going to have to get used to Naruto. He wasn't about to discard his life-long friend to appease anyone's ego. Besides, if he could control his feelings for his sunny flatmate, he would of done away with them years ago, right?

He finished moving the files and disconnected the key.

"I'm sorry." Juugo's quiet voice drifted over the humming of his laptop.

Sasuke's eyes shifted across the room.

"I know it's not my place, but it doesn't seem fair." The large man averted his amber eyes. "He doesn't even realise how you feel about him, right?"

Sasuke's silence was as telling as any words.

"He doesn't deserve…"

"He saved me." Sasuke bit. "He saved my life, my sanity, my everything. For more years than I care to admit, he was my only connection to this world. Don't tell me what he does and doesn't deserve."

Juugo sighed, staring blankly at the carpet.

"Allow me to rephrase?" He asked, standing and placing his large hands on Sasuke's shoulders.

Sasuke could feel his fingers digging into his shirt.

When he didn't reply Juugo continued. "I know I don't know the extent of your bond with him. I'm not trying to say he doesn't deserve your friendship."

Juugo kneaded his thumbs into his shoulder blades.

"In fact, I guess I should thank him for bringing you to me in one piece."

The large man knelt again, bringing his face level with Sasuke's. He just pressed his nose against his jaw. Sasuke felt his heart begin to do that strange fluttery thing again.

"But your life shouldn't remain a mausoleum to a man who doesn't return your feelings."

Sasuke felt himself stiffen in Juugo's embrace.

"I'm not trying to be cruel, Sasuke." His words were but a whisper. "In fact, I think, if he's half the friend you say he is, that he wouldn't want you to suffer for him either."

Juugo spun Sasuke in his chair. He felt a warm hand trace his jaw line, and Juugo trailed the pad of his thumb against Sasuke's down-turned lips.

"Maybe Sasuke, maybe it's time to move on."

He cupped his chin, tipping it up slightly. Juugo was asking to kiss him, he knew. Sasuke's eyes widened, but he didn't turn away. Juugo knew his rules, but… The other man brushed his lips so delicately against his own, he hardly registered they were there.

It was nice, this whisper of a kiss. It felt right. Almost. A pair of blue eyes flickered in front of his face and Sasuke momentarily felt nauseous.

Juugo pulled away and just looked at him, as though he were studying every detail in his black eyes. At last he smiled, leaned forward to kiss his forehead, and stood.

"Are you sure I can take this?" He asked, fingering the key on the desk.

Sasuke shrugged. "I have two."

"I'll be sure to give it back to you." He added as they walked to the door. "Tomorrow maybe?"

Juugo sounded hopeful.

"Maybe." Sasuke replied, as the awkwardness settled back into his toes.

The other man pulled him forward into a lopsided embrace.

"I'll look forward to it." He teased, again brushing his lips across his forehead.

He felt warm and wanted, resting inside Juugo's burly arms, and he was a bit hesitant to see him go. Sasuke wondered if he was supposed to kiss him goodnight.

In an instant, he was gone, and Sasuke was alone. All traces comfort disappeared with the single click of the door. He staggered, unseeing across the room.

They _hurt_. Juugo's words hurt more than he imagined. He'd told himself a million times that Naruto didn't love him, but hearing someone else say it – even gently whispered against his skin – _burned_.

He could feel his chest tightening against his heart, and it groaned in protest. A small voice in his head shouted, in a cruel whisper, to give up hope. His pulse slammed, erratic and out of control.

He'll never love you.

Sasuke wondered if a person could honestly die of a broken heart.

He was dying, wasn't he? He felt himself slip away from his body, detached from his physical self. If only he could escape this _terror_ that had seeped through his bones. Did dead people have bones?

He heard someone enter the apartment through the deafening crashes in his ears – knew it was Naruto from his cheerful call: "_Tadaima!_" _I'm home_.

He couldn't respond. His body was frozen, still, save a slight tremble in his burning muscles. A chill ran up his spine. His brain was still bouncing in his skull.

"Sorry I'm so late. On my way home from the gym, I ran into…"

He could see Naruto pause, bright eyes clouding with a sudden strike of worry.

"Sasuke, what's wrong?"

Fuck fuck fuck! He didn't want Naruto to watch him die.

He blinked. Forced his eyes to close and open that was. He saw the blond man kneeling before him through the wrong end of a pair of binoculars.

"I'm fine." Sasuke managed to grit out between clenched teeth.

The raw, panicked edge of his voice surprised even him.

"Sasuke."

Naruto gripped his hands, and for the first time, Sasuke noticed they had gone damp and clammy. He couldn't feel his fingertips. Naruto's proximity wasn't helping his racing heart.

"Breathe." Naruto ordered through the oppressive fog.

Sasuke hadn't realised he'd stopped.

He sucked in a tiny gasp of air, but there was no room in his chest for anything besides his beating heart.

"Breathe _out_." Naruto clarified, and Sasuke felt like an idiot.

He forced the air out of his chest, immediately feeling the pressure lessen.

Oh. So he'd been hyperventilating. Lovely.

The fear lingered, chilled in his veins, but he could feel the heavy haze lifting before his eyes.

He matched the rise and fall of Naruto's steady chest, his anchor, always. Was cutting off hope really cutting his stay in this world?

Sasuke felt pathetic. He slammed his eyes shut to keep the burning in his eyes from spreading. He could feel his body shuddering. What a pathetic excuse for an Uchiha. Could he do nothing on his own?

Naruto shifted, and settled onto the couch next to him, cloaking him in a soft embrace. Sasuke buried his nose in the crook of a tan neck. The familiar scent of lavender shampoo invaded his nose, mixed with the slight sting of chlorine. Naruto didn't know – couldn't know – the way his touch burnt Sasuke to his core; the way his heart was _breaking_. So he remained there, silent and steady waiting for Sasuke's heartbeat returned to normal.

"Are you OK?" A warm voice asked after an eternity of silence.

Sasuke shrugged, avoiding eye contact. He could feel his cheeks burning from inside Naruto's arms. God, how embarrassing!

His flatmate seemed to recognise his discomfort.

"It was just a panic attack, S'ke." His arms tightened. "It can happen to anyone."

Sasuke shifted slightly, chancing a pair of burning blue eyes.

"Do you ever get them?"

His voice was dry. He swallowed on instinct.

"Used to." Naruto admitted with a nod. "Had them all the time in junior high."

Sasuke flinched, the sick sensation of shame dripping down his throat. He didn't know because he wasn't there.

"Sometimes I'd wake up in the middle of the night. I thought I was having a heart attack. I'd want to scream, but I couldn't." A pregnant pause filled the air.

"It's not like anyone could've heard me, anyway." Naruto added, voice distant.

Sasuke didn't know how to respond. A wave of nausea coursed around inside his stomach. Junior high school was a period neither man was keen to discuss. Naruto said he didn't blame him for leaving – wasn't angry about those horrible words he'd said before he did – but Sasuke could sometimes still see the hurt lingering behind his bright eyes.

He never really asked what happened while he was away, and Naruto never volunteered much information. When he left _he_ was Naruto's most important person, his _only_ person save his godfather. He returned, however, to find a hopeful teenager who had amassed a small following of dedicated friends. Yet, Naruto had been a hopeful teenager who bore the pain of loss. Jiraiya was dead. Sasuke never asked, but he knew, for a period at least, Naruto had been alone. Hiding today inside that confident man, was a twice-orphaned, abandoned child facing a loneliness so familiar, it caused his bones to ache.

"But that's neither here nor there." Naruto continued with the smile back in his voice. "Are you OK now?"

Sasuke nodded, trying to still the jitters that still skirted through his nerves. Naruto rested his cheek against the crown of his head.

"What happened?"

Sasuke shrugged again. He couldn't think, didn't want to.

"It's not like…" Naruto hesitated. "I mean it wasn't anything I did or something, right?"

Sasuke shifted to give Naruto a disbelieving roll of his eyes. And people called him a cocky piece of shit.

"Oh come on," He teased. "I'm playing. And anyway, I'm an idiot, and usually when you're upset it's because I did something stupid or insensitive."

Naruto's lips pulled into a half-smirk.

"You didn't do _anything_." Sasuke retorted.

The bitter chill in his voice surprised even Sasuke. His heart hammered against his ribs.

The smile dropped from Naruto's lips. His wide blue eyes searched Sasuke's blank face for answers, as his mouth formed a soundless "What?" A blond brow furrowed.

"Forget it." Sasuke muttered, feeling thoroughly stupid. "I don't know what happened."

Naruto hummed, the doubt evident in his voice.

"Why did you get in so late?" Sasuke turned hoping to divert his attention.

He shrugged himself out of Naruto's hold. The idiot was just making him feel worse.

"Oh right!" The other man beamed, thankfully letting the matter drop. "I ran into some friends on the way home from the gym. You remember Temari, right?"

Honestly, Sasuke didn't, but Naruto didn't pause for an answer.

"She's in town for a couple of days. Oh by the way, I won't be home for dinner tomorrow, I'm going to see her, did I tell you she's engaged…"

Sasuke tuned out the majority of the rest of the monologue. He would never admit it out loud, but he enjoyed listening to Naruto's ramblings, even if he didn't remember every detail – or most details for that matter. He wasn't sure even Naruto himself expected him to really listen. It was comforting somehow, this inane chatter – a soothing familiarity. It was as if the other man's bright-eyed optimism was contagious. All he had to do was listen to the exaggerated ups and downs of his baritone voice to catch a little bit of Naruto's ridiculous happy.

"You're not even listening anymore, are you?" Naruto pouted, throwing himself back on the couch.

Sasuke snorted, refusing to answer.

"So what about you, you uninterested ass wipe?" Naruto punched him on the shoulder. "Aside from the obvious, how was your night?"

Sasuke shrugged, growing apprehensive. Just thinking about his evening with Juugo was enough to spike his heart rate back over one hundred.

"You totally smell like dude, by the way, so I know it couldn't have been all bad." His flatmate teased.

Sasuke's eyes widened. Naruto always did have a freaky sense of smell.

"He didn't hurt you, did he?" He asked, suddenly serious.

"No." Sasuke quickly countered. "Tonight was… nice."

He chewed on his cheek as Naruto's eyes roamed over his body with a suspicious glint. Sasuke felt his cheeks heating under the intensity of his gaze.

"Nice, huh?" Blue eyes began to twinkle. "So like, dinner and a movie kind of nice?"

Even the backs of Sasuke's hands were beginning to feel warm.

Naruto snorted. "Uchiha Sasuke, are you telling me you had a panic attack because you _like_ someone?"

Sasuke's rather undignified squawking 'no' was obscured behind a loud round of guffaws.

"Jesus, Sasuke." He bit out between chuckles. "That is just like you."

"It's not like that, moron." Sasuke grumbled. "And it's not funny."

"No, I suppose it's not." The idiot was still shaking with laughter, however.

His annoying roommate composed himself slightly. "You're afraid of change, aren't you S'ke? Or is it about letting someone new in?"

Sasuke just shrugged. "Both. But I don't think that's what I was panicking about."

Naruto chewed on his lower lip. Sasuke ignored the urge to kiss it.

"Change is definitely scary." Naruto stared at the blank television in front of them. "But I guess if things stop changing, you're basically dead, right?"

Naruto looked _sad_. Sasuke placed a hesitant hand on his bicep.

"And anyway," the other man brightened considerably. "Letting people in isn't so bad."

"I thought you didn't want me to get involved with Juugo."

"Well, maybe not. But it's not like you've approved of anyone I've dated, _ever_."

Sasuke snorted. It wasn't his fault his idiot had crap taste in women.

"You know my opinions on the matter. But I do want you to be happy. Who am I to tell you who to like?" Naruto paused. "You do like him, right?"

Sasuke shrugged for the millionth time that night. "I don't know." He admitted.

"You're supposed to know… aren't you?" Naruto asked, voice soft.

Sasuke didn't answer. It was a hypothetical question, anyway.

"Like I'm the one to be handing out relationship advice." Naruto muttered after a moment of silence.

He dragged an exhausted hand over his eyes.

"Fuck." He cursed, throwing his blond head backwards.

Sasuke shot his flatmate an inquisitive look, trying not to look too hopeful. "Things are still awkward with Sakura?"

"I dunno, S'ke. It's OK, I think. Or maybe not… I just don't know anymore."

As much as Sasuke disliked Naruto's relationship, the desperation in those lonely blue eyes made him shudder. He felt helpless.

"I don't know if we're having a rough period or if we're just stuck." Naruto admitted.

He slouched low on the couch and stared at the ceiling.

"What did she do?" Sasuke growled.

"Nothing. See, that's the thing. Sometimes I think she isn't even trying any more. Or maybe it's me. I've done my share of dumb shit. Did I tell you about that stupid argument I started about diet soda?"

Sasuke hummed. A vague recollection flitted through his head – something about Naruto being angry that Sakura only had Diet Coke in her fridge.

"That was a stupid argument." Sasuke responded flatly.

With a sigh, Naruto blew a depressed raspberry at the ceiling.

"But here's the thing. You should have seen Temari today. She's getting married in May, and she's absolutely _glowing_."

Naruto threw his arms up in the air as if to demonstrate the amount of glow exhibited by his friend.

"And Temari doesn't glow, if you know what I mean. Jesus, even Shikamaru's glowing. They know beyond any shadow of a doubt that they're meant to be together."

Naruto paused, further abusing his lower lip.

"That's how it's supposed to be, right?" He asked, turning to face his friend.

"How the fuck should I know?" Sasuke snapped.

Naruto ignored him.

"I mean, things will never be perfect, but…" He trailed off.

"Fuck, look at me, co-opting the conversation." Naruto looked sheepish. "You're gonna be OK?"

Sasuke nodded. "I need a shower."

"Yes, you do." Naruto agreed.

Sasuke punched him in the stomach.

"But if you need anything, come get me, asshole." The blond man choked.

Sasuke gave him a flat look.

"It's not like it's anything to be ashamed of. I used to get them in clusters, so…"

"Idiot, I'm not invalid."

"Seriously, S'ke." Naruto sat up and brushed the pad of his thumb along Sasuke's chin. "Just come get me… Even if it's two."

Sasuke rolled his eyes. "Fine."

His heart squeezed in on itself as Naruto helped him to his feet.

"You're not alone, Sasuke."

Yet, he was wrong. Sasuke _was_ alone. No matter how sincere were Naruto's blue eyes, nor how warm his words, it couldn't reach him inside. His roommate had his heart on a yo-yo lately, and fuck it wasn't healthy.

He pulled his hand away, feeling the cold slither into his skin.

Naruto was right. He was scared of change. Scared that if he let Naruto go, this time, he wouldn't come after him. Terrified that life just might go on without him. He could feel the panic again rising in his throat.

Fuck it all. It hurt. Made him sick to his stomach.

He stilled his ragged breath. He had to put some distance between them if he wanted to regain some balance in his life. But damnit, if it wasn't painful.

He turned his back to Naruto and marched away, head high.

"Goodnight, Sasuke!" Naruto called.

The door clicked into the empty hallway.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: <strong>Getting to those mid-story lulls, in which things seem to be getting worse instead of better. :( Development soon, though I promise!

Let me know what you think. I'm always happy to accept criticism. I do keep an open mind with my stories.

You know, being around native English speakers has made me realise how awkward my speaking can be sometimes. I've got adverbs all over the place. X_X I fear, however, that it's NOT helping my writing. I dunno... getting your mind in other languages helps to deconstruct your own metaphors and discover others you've never thought of. In Italian, their way of saying "you can't have your cake and eat it too" is "you can either have a full cellar or your wife drunk"

Maybe I'll go read something. Or maybe I'll go play in the snow. :3


	6. Chapter 6

**Author's Note:** I'm feeling so very loved regarding the outpouring of reviews, especially after sort of a humdrum chapter, like chapter five. Thank you for each one. I really do adore them all, and I take every suggestion into consideration.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter Six:<strong>

Sasuke awoke at 8:30 the following morning.

"Fuck!" He cursed, tripping out of bed.

His night was spent tossing and turning, fretting over stupidity until sleep finally found him three short hours ago.

He sprinted to the bathroom, arms full of clothes, to find Naruto hunched over the sink with a toothbrush hanging stupidly from his mouth.

"Ah, yer schtill her." He spat a mouthful of blue foam. "Shit man, you'd better hurry."

Sasuke sent him the ugliest glare in his repertoire, the one he usually reserved for Sakura. As if he didn't already know he was running late.

Naruto held up his hands in surrender and backed into the hallway.

Sasuke's night had been plagued with thoughts of his annoying roommate. Gods, for once he was glad his parents were dead so his father didn't have to suffer through the disgrace his youngest son had become. Losing sleep over a boy? How pathetic.

At least his pissy, sleep deprived mood would keep Naruto away from him for today.

He threw on his shirt, grabbed his bag and headed for the door.

"Wait a sec!" Naruto called, emerging from the kitchen with a thermos and a bagel.

He stood in front of him, still clad in his pajamas, wearing a big, dopey smile.

"Most important meal of the day!" He beamed, attempting to hand Sasuke his little breakfast on his way out the door.

"What the fuck is that?" Sasuke snapped.

Naruto deflated.

"I made you breakfast…" He pouted.

Why did the idiot have to look so crushed?

Sasuke huffed. "I don't have time…"

"Eat it in class, ass wipe." The blond man interrupted.

Naruto had impeccable resilience; Sasuke could not deny that fact.

At last, he physically lifted Sasuke's hands and placed the tiny breakfast bundle inside.

"You're welcome, asshole."

Naruto promptly slammed the door in his face.

Sasuke could feel the smirk forming on his lips before he ruthlessly crushed it. He wouldn't allow Naruto's foolish kindness to ruin his bad mood.

* * *

><p>Naruto sat at the cosy kitchen table, noisily slurping his noodle soup. His godfather glared at him from across the table.<p>

"Can you eat like a human being instead of a monkey?" The man muttered irritably, punctuating his statement with a loud slurp of his own.

Naruto shot him a noodly grin.

"When you do, old man."

Jiraiya rolled his eyes, grumbling.

That Uchiha. He narrowed his dark, slate eyes, as he watched his gorilla of a godson spill soup all over the table. That Uchiha had been gone for just over a month now, and Naruto remained a shell of himself.

To the average set of eyes, Naruto would seem fine, Jiraiya mused. He smiled. He joked. He bounced in his chair. He ate like a freaking pig. Jiraiya, however, did not have an average set of eyes – at least, not when it came to Naruto. He was slipping on a brave face, putting one foot in front of the other, and grinning at all the right times. Naruto didn't want him to worry. Yet, his laughter was a little too sharp, his bounce was a little too irregular, and he squinted just a little too much when he smiled – trying to hide his empty eyes. Jiraiya could tell. He could see way too much of himself in that boy.

Jiraiya sighed dramatically, sweeping his hand through his unruly white hair as he listened half-heartedly to Naruto's exaggerated tale of woe about how his little friend Sakura totally ignored him in English class today.

Sakura Haruno. Jiraiya suppressed a snort. Now there was another disaster waiting to happen. He liked the girl, he really did. She was incredibly sharp, a cute little thing, and stronger than an ox to boot, but she was just a little too much like her aunt to suit Jiraiya's taste. Indeed, he and that annoying aunt of hers had spent the majority of their lives in an unstable, _unhealthy_ relationship. God, just this morning she'd thrown him out of her bedroom on his ass, for merely _mentioning_ that he was beginning to feel his age. Geez, he wasn't even referring to her. Why exactly, they couldn't just settle down and be happy, after all theses years, was beyond him. At this point, he reckoned, they were just too old and too drunk to change.

He didn't want to see Naruto and Sakura follow in their footsteps: too stubborn to get along, too stubborn to give up on each other. He knew they were just children, but he really hoped Naruto would outgrow his infatuation with her. Otherwise, his persistence would certainly win her over some day. She could be a good friend, that was sure, but it could mean only hurt for both of them if they started down the wrong path.

Forget Haruno, however. Tweenage angst aside, she was hardly the real problem. That Uchiha. That _fucking_ Uchiha.

Uchiha had been implanted in their lives since that first day of kindergarten so many years ago. Jiraiya liked the little twerp, at first. He was a little reserved, and a maybe a bit of a snob for his tastes, but he kept Naruto on his toes, pushed him, motivated him. Naruto certainly could use someone to challenge him to do his homework.

Somewhere along the line, however, everything changed. Uchiha Sasuke ceased to be Naruto's lifeline, and began drowning him instead.

Jiraiya knew the poor kid had watched his parents die. Something like that could really fuck with you, for sure, but it wasn't until several years after the fact that Uchiha started to spiral downhill and pull Naruto with him. In fact, it was only in the past year or so that he shed all his redeeming qualities, and became the total ass hat that Jiraiya, for one, was happy to toss out of their lives.

Numerous times, he caught Sasuke with the scent of cigarettes and marijuana on his clothes. When he asked him about it, the little jerk flat out lied. He tried for weeks to get a hold of his slippery uncle, but finally had to settle for confiding in his older brother, who, to be fair, was probably a better guardian than his uncle ever would be. Then, he started insulting Naruto, _hard_. They'd always had a playful banter, but Sasuke became cruel. It confused Naruto. It _hurt_ Naruto. Jiraiya watched Naruto retreat into a shell that he didn't even know the kid possessed.

One day, old Uncle Uchiha decided to move to back to Japan. Sasuke could have stayed with his older brother, but he decided to leave. _Worthless_, he called Naruto. Told him he'd never meant anything to him. He called Naruto things even Jiraiya didn't want to repeat. Then, he proceeded to physically assault Naruto, punching and kicking him, nearly landing the smaller boy in the hospital.

Jiraiya ground his teeth. He should have ignored Naruto's wishes and pressed charges. Naruto might not forgive him, but at least he'd feel better about himself.

The boy had yet to recover from this betrayal, and what was worse, the other kids in his school seemed to have picked up where that Uchiha left off.

"I got a call from your teacher today." Jiraiya mumbled over a mouthful of soup.

Naruto's bright eyes widened comically.

"Whatever it was, I didn't do it!" He defended.

Jiraiya snorted. "It was your maths teacher, Mr. Umino." He continued.

Naruto cocked his head to the side.

"Then, I _really_ didn't do it."

Jiraiya couldn't help but chuckle.

"You're not in trouble, brat."

Naruto deflated with a comical sigh of relief.

"Mr. Umino told me you're being bullied. Is this true?"

Naruto began examining the wood grain on the table.

"He said you asked him not to interfere."

Jiraiya studied the down-turned face before him. The poor kid looked ashamed. Like it was _his_ fault the kids were picking on him.

"He also said he suspects it's getting worse."

Naruto said nothing, only twisted his hands in his lap.

"Naruto." Jiraiya said in a soft yet firm voice.

The boy finally raised his eyes, brow pinched in the middle.

"What's going on at school?" The old man asked.

Naruto shrugged.

Jiraiya sighed as the small teenager again averted his eyes.

"Should we change schools?" Jiraiya suggested. "Get a new start? New kids, new friends?"

"What does running away solve?" Naruto bit. "I'm freaking franken-face. I'll be alone wherever I go."

"You do not look like Frankenstein!" Jiraiya snapped, surprising even himself with the huffy timbre his voice adopted.

"And you're not alone." Jiraiya clapped his big ruddy hand on Naruto's shoulder. "I know it might feel like it without Uchiha around…"

Naruto winced visibly.

"But he wasn't the only person who cared about you."

Jiraiya studied his godson's anguished face. He was trying to wipe it blank, but he'd never been very good at that.

"You're a strong kid." Jiraiya's voice was low in the cheerful, yellow kitchen. "And I respect that you want to deal with your problems yourself." He continued.

"But you're _not_ alone."

Jiraiya could feel something squeezing his heart, and the sensation sent tremors through his whole body.

"Whatever I can do to make this period easier for you, I'll do it in a heartbeat."

His hand rested heavy on his godson's trembling shoulder. It was incredible that even after these eight years, Naruto still seemed the tiny five-year old child that had stolen the old man's heart.

"If you want me to talk to your principal, I'll call him right now. If you want to change schools, we'll do it tomorrow." He continued, his voice but a grumble. "Even if all you want me to do is sit here and complain about your shit table etiquette, I can do that too."

Naruto chewed on his lip.

"Look, brat. I know I may just be some silly old man to you, but you're the only thing I've got in this world."

All this emotion was making it difficult to breathe. Jiraiya let escape a laboured sigh.

Naruto nodded, his eyes darting back to Jiraiya's.

"Thanks, old man."

He smiled – small but genuine, and Jiraiya felt some of the pain in his stomach relax. He was a good kid, Naruto, and he didn't deserve this ugly hand life had dealt him.

"I know I'm not your father…"

"Yes you are." Naruto interrupted with such conviction that Jiraiya was taken aback.

"I don't mean to disrespect my real parents. I know we were happy, but I hardly remember them."

Naruto's voice cracked in that embarrassing way with which only young, teenage boys have to cope. Jiraiya suppressed a chuckle at the flush that fell across a pair of scarred cheeks.

"But you're the best damn dad I could ever hope for, old man."

This child was simply amazing, Jiraiya thought. Despite omnipresent, bright-eyed innocence Naruto displayed, he could nonetheless speak with the sapience of a man well beyond his years. Jiraiya could almost see the boy's father, sitting there across the table, and he had never been more proud.

He pulled his charge into a one-armed hug, ruffling up an already messy blond mop. Naruto shrugged away, the blush darkening as he swatted at his godfather.

Naruto meant what he said. Jiraiya was a good father, and he was lucky to have him. Despite the odd hours he kept – 'I'm an author, an _artist_ brat, creativity strikes me when it will!' – Jiraiya had always managed to appear at all his soccer games and other school functions. On his birthday, he even baked cupcakes for his elementary school class. So, he may not have always been completely sober at said soccer games, and those cupcakes might not have been the most attractive pastries ever created, but they were devoured nonetheless. Indeed, Jiraiya may have been the most unorthodox homeroom mother that ever stepped into a classroom, but he took his duty relatively seriously, and he was a hell of a lot better parent than some of the other kids', even with random bits of pornographic texts poking out of his pockets.

"Help me clean up," Jiraiya groaned. "Then this old man is going to bed."

Naruto furrowed his brow. It was unlike his godfather to go to bed before two AM, much less before the evening news finished.

"Are you OK?" He asked, as he placed their dishes in the dishwasher.

"Yeah, I'm alright." The white-haired man assured him. "Just felt kind of shitty this week. I think I'm fighting off the flu or something."

Naruto nodded and caught the sponge Jiraiya beaned at him and flung it in the sink.

"Finish up your homework, and I'll see you in the morning."

"Oh and brat…"

Naruto turned to see Jiraiya, standing red-faced and awkward by the table.

"You're a good kid." He said finally. "Your parents would be proud."

The boy felt his lips twitching into a grin. His heart swelled, and for the first time since Sasuke had left him, he felt like things might just be OK again.

"I love you too, old man."

Naruto didn't know as he closed his bedroom door with a renewed sense of determination, that those would be the last words he'd ever speak to his godfather.

* * *

><p>Sasuke had terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.<p>

Step in an icy puddle: Check!

Arrive late for lecture: Check!

Have argument with advisor: Check!

Pour salt in tea: Check!

Step in snow covered dog poo: Double check!

Discover you've left your phone and are now cut off from all humanity: … not so bad, actually.

By the end of his final lecture late afternoon, Sasuke was ready to go home and forget this day ever happened. He bade Neji adieu and shuffled out into the crisp, frosty air.

The insistent rumbling of his stomach reminded him that he had missed lunch. He took a quick detour into a small, local market, purposefully foregoing the bustling grocery chain near his apartment.

Sasuke loved the earthy scent local stores always seemed to carry. With a determined grimace, he set into the store to procure a delicious, and most importantly expedient dinner.

He frowned at the small display of sad, pinkish tomatoes. He sniffed one experimentally, only to have the sticky smell of plastic fill his nose. He huffed. At this point his favourite food was hardly even comestible. Gods, he couldn't wait for July.

"Do you always look so angry when you're inspecting produce?"

Sasuke startled.

A bemused Juugo towered over his shoulder, shopping basket in hand.

"Only in winter."

He offered Juugo an embarrassed smirk.

"Not a fan of winter veggies?" He asked, motioning to the squash and root vegetables that filled a good ninety percent of the produce aisle.

Sasuke shrugged. "It's not that. I'd just kill for a ripe tomato right about now."

Juugo shifted his weight, looking every bit as awkward as a gorilla in a leotard. Sasuke, at a loss for words, resumed inspecting his tomatoes.

"I tried to call earlier." Juugo was staring at one of the lights on the ceiling. "Sorry if I bothered you."

"I forgot my phone." Sasuke admitted.

Juugo visibly relaxed.

"Or I lost it… Hopefully I left it at home."

Sasuke peered at the other man from behind his bangs. He was chuckling softly.

"Since I'm working near your campus this afternoon, I just called to ask if you wanted me to drop off your USB key. But you didn't answer, so I left it at home."

Sasuke shrugged. "Don't worry about it."

"We can go get it though." Juugo's voice lifted with hope. "I can make you dinner?" He offered.

A date. There could be no plausible deniability this time. Juugo was asking him on a date. He should say no. Pretend he had something to do. If he really wanted his USB key back, he could get it after one of their post-clubbing, drunken romps in the hay, so to speak.

"Alright."

Fuck. Did he really just say that?

Juugo gave him a soft smile.

"What does Mr. Produce-Terroriser like besides home grown tomatoes?"

This was not cool. This was _not_ cool!

He shrugged. "I'm pretty easy to please. Not a big fan of desserts."

"I was going to bake some shrimp in a pumpkin."

Sasuke couldn't begin even imagine the befuddled look that must have been written across his face at that moment.

"I saw it on Pinterest. It looked good." Juugo defended, whipping out a list.

Sasuke shrugged. "Baked pumpkin shrimp it is."

As Juugo filled his basket with everything from cream cheese to cilantro, Sasuke trailed awkwardly behind him. At last, at the checkout, he deftly paid while Juugo was fiddling for his wallet. The other man attempted to protest, but he brushed him off. He may be smaller than Juugo, but damnit, he wasn't about to let anyone treat him like a girl.

"I need to stop by work and lock up." He indicated the direction with his head. "Then we can head over to my place."

Sasuke nodded, nervousness coiling deep in his stomach. He chewed on his lip. Was this sick feeling a normal part of relationships or was it an indicator that this date was a bad idea? Naruto was absolutely right. Juugo could be a bit unhinged at times, judging from the number of times he'd been tossed from the club for getting too violent… too violent according to BDSM standards, that was. On the other hand, he'd gone a really long time without incident. Maybe he _was_ on medication, and his violent tendencies were a thing of the past.

They stopped in front of a complex of small buildings. Sasuke's eyes flicked to the sign that read 'Tenbin No Kill Shelter' inside a simple, stylised symbol that resembled the Libra zodiac sign.

Sasuke blinked, surprised.

"Yeah… This place is kind of my baby." He scratched the back of his head in mild embarrassment. "I started working on the idea in high school."

Sasuke could hear excited barking as the approached the largest building. Juugo let him in the back door, and he was assaulted with the mixed scents of antiseptic and the typical musk of animal.

"I have a couple of locations, though this is the biggest." He continued, and Sasuke could see a light blush dusting his cheeks.

"It's amazing."

And it was. Sasuke never could have imagined that Juugo owned a place like this.

Sasuke sent Juugo an appreciative smile as the latter lead Sasuke down the hallway to a small office.

"We're usually pretty full." Juugo admitted with a frown. "You don't happen to need another cat… or a dog… possibly a bird?" He offered hopefully. "Already sterilised, shots up to date?"

"Yugi would never forgive me." Sasuke snorted. "Plus, I think Kyuubi would eat anything smaller than a husky."

Juugo, who was presently straightening the papers on his desk, cocked his head.

"He's my flatmate's." Sasuke answered his unspoken question, purposefully avoiding speaking Naruto's name. "He's a sweet cat, he's just a little hungry."

"Is he a Maine Coon too?" The redhead asked.

Sasuke shrugged. "Probably. My flatmate found them in a gutter, so we can't know for sure, but he does weigh about ten kilos."

Juugo gave him a sweet smile. "So you have a soft spot for rescue animals, too?"

Sasuke made a face.

"Sure…" He trailed off.

Juugo pinned him with a sceptical raise of his eyebrow.

Sasuke could feel his cheeks heating.

"It's not that I ever actively disliked animals, I just never had any growing up." He explained. "I guess I thought they were more of a pain than they were worth."

"So naturally, you have a cat."

"She's an attack cat. I like that. Besides, she adopted me, not the other way around." Sasuke joked.

Juugo snorted and procured a set of keys from his desk drawer. He inclined his head to the door. Sasuke nodded and let Juugo lock up behind him.

"Oh there you are!"

Sasuke startled at the loud voice behind him. He turned to find a rugged-looking woman in scrubs and white lab coat. She had sharp, keen eyes and wild brown hair tied back with a messy headband. He mused that she looked almost familiar.

"I just removed the sutures on the female cats." She informed Juugo with a curt nod in Sasuke's direction. "They will be ready for release in a couple of days." She paused, dragging her hand through her long, shaggy hair. "Also, that farm called back. They said they would be interested in some of your feral cats for the barns, though they wanted to know if you could sterilise some of the cats they have on site. I told them you'd gone for the day, and would call them back tomorrow."

"Thanks." Juugo replied with a kind smile. "Tsume is a local vet." He explained to Sasuke. "Her practice offers free services to us when they can. Mostly, they do our sterilisations."

Tsume grinned at Sasuke. She looked actually a little terrifying.

"This is Sasuke." Juugo motioned at him with an awkward flick of his wrist. "He's a friend of mine."

Sasuke took her hand in a firm, brusk, handshake.

"Sasuke… Sasuke…" Tsume clicked her tongue. "Uchiha?" She asked.

Sasuke felt himself bristle. It may have been a long time since his family had been in the news, but this woman was definitely old enough to remember them.

"You're Naruto's friend." She explained. "The moody one."

Sasuke relaxed, but huffed at the insult.

"He's good friends with my son. He's around a lot. Even brings your cats to my office. Yours is the feisty one, right?"

He nodded, his mind going through a Rolodex of Naruto's friends before it screeched to a halt on that annoying bartender Naruto had met his first year of Uni.

"Kiba Inuzuka?"

Sasuke's voice lilted at the end, although it wasn't really a question. There was no denying the resemblance between mother and son. No wonder she looked familiar.

She flashed her teeth in a second feral grin. "Guilty. Kibbles is my spawn."

Sasuke had to choke back a snort. "Kibbles?"

"Well, it suits him, doesn't it?"

He could not disagree with that statement.

"Alright, comrades." Tsume gave the two a mock salute. "I'm off. I'll be in next week for the dogs." Her sneakers squeaked as she made her way toward the door. "And Uchiha," she continued. "Tell that dumbass, blondie, I said hello."

The door slammed behind her before Sasuke could respond. He blinked twice.

"Jesus Christ." Juugo was clenching and unclenching his fist. "Does everyone in this fucking city know your fucking roommate?"

Sasuke shrugged, wincing as Juugo cursed again.

"Let's go." He barked, switching off the lights with an angry flip of his wrist.

Sasuke followed him to his car, uncertainty flooding his veins. If he really wanted to go through with this, Juugo's obsessive jealousy would have to go. However, by the time the other man popped the trunk of his anonymous, mid-90's model car, he was already smiling, arranging the groceries in such a way that they wouldn't spill en route to his apartment.

Sasuke pulled open the passenger side door, settling into his seat. Juugo flipped the radio to something peppy (and annoying), and Sasuke filled his lungs with air. With the heat going full blast, Sasuke attempted to relax, willing the apprehension out of his bones.

Nothing bad was going to happen that night. It wasn't as though it were _his_ world that was just hours away from collapse.

* * *

><p>Three days after his arrival in Tokyo, thirteen-year old Uchiha Sasuke lost his virginity. As he sat bonelessly on the mouldy couch where he had just done the deed, he wondered if he was supposed to feel different – if he was supposed to feel more like a man. In reality, he just felt like he needed a shower. He watched his partner preparing several lines of coke on the greasy coffee table in this burnt out apartment. It was her second round. He figured those first lines were what inspired her sudden interest in his dick in the first place. She sat, long legs leaking out of her plaid skirt. She'd yet to button her blouse. He half wondered why she wore a uniform. He seriously doubted she went to school.<p>

When she finished the lines, she offered him a go, which he politely declined.

Her name was Tayuya, or something like that. She was sixteen, with glassy dark eyes. Her hair had been bleached and dyed so many times that it had become course and choppy. It was currently a pinkish-red, and she swept it away from her face with a headband, most likely so she could snort cocaine more easily.

She pulled away from the table with a shudder and a curse. Sniffling heavily.

Sasuke had never given much thought as to how sex would go for the first time, but he certainly hadn't imagined it would be like this – fast, half dressed and fumbling on a lumpy couch, to the narrator of Mortal Kombat shouting stupid shit like "fatality" in the background. Quite frankly, he hadn't known what to do. He'd never really touched a girl before, much less done the nasty. He'd only had one kiss, and even that had really just been more of an accident than a kiss. Sex felt good, sure, but he found the whole experience rather disappointing.

There was one thing that surprised him the most about his first time, even more than a virtual stranger grabbing his collar, throwing him to the couch, and more or less having her way with him, though he'd never admit it out loud. He certainly hadn't imagined that his best friend's… his _former_ best friend's impossibly blue eyes would be haunting him from another continent the whole time he'd been moving inside her.

"Hey birdbrain!" Tayuya shouted across the room.

The screams emanating from the television in the corner silenced.

"Get over here. This is some good shit!" She ordered in a shaky voice.

"And bring some of that weed for…" she paused.

"Uchiha." Sasuke supplied.

"For Uchiha." She added.

Two teenage boys, twins apparently, made their way through the dingy apartment. They were both sickly pale, with greasy bleached locks that hung in their faces, obscuring twin pairs of sunken cheeks and harsh black eyes. One was in a wheelchair. Sasuke didn't ask. A bag of marijuana was thrown on his chest, and he snagged the glass pipe from the table.

He lit the bowl and inhaled, the musky scent filled the small room.

"I'll never understand why people like downers."

Tayuya leaned back against the couch, preparing some blow on a plate for the boy in the wheelchair. Her bra was unclasped at the front, and her naked breasts hung from her thin frame. She handed the boy the plate and grinned.

The other boy flopped on the couch next to Sasuke.

"So you're Uchiha, huh?" He asked, though it wasn't much of a question. "I never knew the big boss man ever managed to reproduce."

"Is that where he disappeared to all these years?" Tayuya wondered aloud. "Raising a bunch of brats."

"He's my uncle." Sasuke said, his voice twinging from the marijuana.

"I heard Orochimaru say he'd gone abroad for a couple of years to avoid the fucking _deka_." The boy continued.

Sasuke blinked. He never realised that he probably still spoke Japanese like a five-year old. Half the time he had no idea what the fuck people were saying.

"Guess the heat died down, so he's back." This was the boy in the wheelchair. His voice was lower, and somehow more sinister than his brother's. "With more soldiers."

"I'm Sakon." The boy on the couch offered Sasuke his clammy hand. "This is my brother Ukon, and you've already met our resident slut, Tayuya."

"Fuck you!" She bit.

"Been there, done that." He replied with a casual wave of his hand.

"There're a couple more guys you'll probably get to know." He continued as though he didn't hear Tayuya's indignant outrage. "We're sort of in charge of this part of the city."

"We do some of the dealing," the twin, Ukon, explained sensing Sasuke's confusion, "but mostly we do the enforcement."

"Enforcement?" Sasuke asked, intrigued.

Tayuya cracked her knuckles. "Making sure other dealers keep off our turf. Collecting debts." Her teeth flashed in a wicked smile. "You know, the fun stuff."

Sasuke hit his pipe again, holding the smoke in his lungs. He could feel the room spinning slightly. He wasn't sure if he was greening out or if their had been something interesting in his bowl. He took one final drag and set the pipe back on the table. He leaned back on the couch, enjoying the pleasant haze that settled behind his eyelids.

He found Tayuya in his lap again. He could feel her heart racing against his.

"Wanna go again?" She asked, unbuttoning his pants.

He cracked one eye and gave her a disbelieving look.

"Come on. You're young. You can get it back up again." She teased, trailing her tongue down the column of his neck.

Sasuke just shrugged and let her fumble with his pants until they were again at his hips.

"On that note, we'll let little Uchiha finish getting properly initiated." Sakon stood and pushed his brother's chair across the room. "Make sure to wear a condom, Uchiha. You never know what crawled up that cunt." He advised sagely, ducking as the glass pipe went whizzing past his head. It hit the wall with a definite thunk before shattering on the ground.

"Crazy bitch." He muttered, plunking back in front of the TV.

Sasuke wasn't entirely sure he could perform fully, but as he felt the stirrings of arousal pooling in his loins, he found he didn't really care. He'd let Tayuya and her coke-induced frenzy do all the work this time. She seemed to like it better that way anyway. The room was still spinning, but Sasuke hardly cared. He relaxed and enjoyed the sensation of her movements on top of him. It felt better this go around, and though he hadn't figured out why, just yet, Sasuke would be hard pressed to tell her to stop.

It wouldn't be long before Sasuke realised that substance was the only way to chase those blue eyes from his brain. Indeed, he let his mind go completely, and he felt comfortably blank. He wouldn't think of Naruto again until the next morning.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong>

Oh my! A real date with Juugo. Will Sasuke come out unscathed? How did Naruto react to Jiraiya's death? And whose life is about to be turned upside down?

Stay tuned!

Last chapter of lulls in this arc, I promise. Super big developments next chapter. Welp, I guess the Juugo lovers should be happy. Everyone else is probably going to murder me.

I hope this chapter clarifies a bit how (according to Naruto) Sasuke ended up half-dead in Roppongi. In case anyone else is confused about the location this story:

It doesn't really matter where it is now, somewhere besides Japan, although the Uchihas _are_ Japanese. (Hence calling him Uchiha Sasuke, and everyone else the other way round) About the Japanese names, 99.9% of minor characters are pulled from the movies, fillers, or are just such minor characters that one hardly remembers his/her name. (Koyuki is the snow princess, Bekko is one of the chuunin who hated Naruto in ep 1) The only true OC is Tatsuki. He's got a Japanese name basically because I thought it'd be weird to have all Japanese names and one guy called Todd. :)

Anyway, chapter seven is completed. It needs a little revision, then it'll be up next week.

Comments and criticism are ALWAYS welcome. I do hope this story isn't dragging. It'll start to go in the right direction very soon. Though it ought to be long-ish by the time we're through.


	7. Chapter 7

**Author's Note: **Sorry for the late update guys. At the last minute, I decided to change the last part, basically in entirety :S So it ended up being a long stinking chapter. :) It fits the rest of the story better, anyway.

Thanks again for all the kind words of encouragement. I'm happy to hear anything anyone has to say, even criticism :)

I hope you enjoy!

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter Seven<strong>

She was perfect, Naruto thought, as she leaned back on his couch, fretting over exams. Honestly, he wasn't paying attention to the exact words she was saying – something about terrifying infectious bacteria that would probably keep him up at night if he actually listened – he was just watching her lips move, her eyes dart dramatically around the room, the gentle rise and fall of her chest. His eyes traced the cool winter sunlight as it played in her hair, cupped her chin, and dove beneath the soft cotton collar of her long-sleeved shirt.

What good was perfection if she didn't love him?

"Naruto, if you keep looking at me like that, we're going to be late for dinner." Sakura teased, running a finger down his chest to rest on the edge of his belt buckle.

Her jade eyes sparkled with playfulness.

"You aren't even listening to me, are you?"

Her small, sweet lips pulled into an indulgent smile.

"You're so beautiful, Sakura." Was Naruto's only reply.

She rolled her eyes. "I knew it."

"I'm serious." He retorted, turning his eyes to hers. "Do you even know how beautiful you are?"

She gasped – a simple intake of breath against those perfect pink lips. A slight blush rose to her cheeks.

It was amazing, that after all these years, she still grew embarrassed – by his compliments, by his gaze. Sometimes, even when he was seated deep inside her, when Naruto wanted to find her core and rest his head against it, he'd catch her eyes and she would flush the darkest red as she shuddered against him.

He sometimes feared his love would break her.

"_I'm_ serious!" She countered, yanking on his belt as she recovered. "We have to leave in like two minutes. Quit trying to make me jump your bones!"

Naruto gave her his most lecherous grin. "Two minutes, you say?"

He circled the pads of his fingers on the soft of her belly.

"Think I can work my magic in two minutes?"

His fingers trailed to the button of her jeans, but she swatted him away with a huff.

"I'd admit you're good, Naruto." She teased with a lewd grin of her own. "But not even I'm _that_ good."

Naruto's retort was cut off as Bach's Toccata and Fugue in D Minor echoed in the living room.

A very confused Sakura handed Naruto a ringing cell phone from the end table.

"Sasuke's." He explained.

A picture of a demon popped up on the screen under the label "El Diablo."

Naruto brightened. He swiped his finger down the bottom of the screen.

"Nii-chan!"

Sakura looked perplexed.

"Hello Naruto-kun." A smooth voice answered, several notes lower than Sasuke's. "Is my little brother around?"

"No." Naruto admitted. "But he's actually not avoiding you this time. He was running late this morning and apparently left his phone."

'Itachi.' He mouthed to his girlfriend.

She nodded, though her lips pursed into a slight frown.

The man on the other end hummed in annoyance.

"Is everything OK?" Naruto inquired.

"Yes. Everything is fine. It's good news, in fact."

Itachi's voice was neutral, but Naruto grinned nonetheless.

"You're not getting married, are you?"

Silence.

"You are!" He accused with a laugh.

"No!" Itachi countered.

An aghast Itachi was even more fun than an aghast Sasuke. Naruto was proud to be one of the few people on the planet who could break Itachi's stoic air.

Naruto gave the older man a doubtful hum.

"I'm _not_ getting married." Itachi mumbled, trying to regain his composure. "And do you know when Sasuke will be back?"

"No, sorry." Naruto answered honestly. "I think he's on a date."

Naruto didn't miss the widening of his girlfriend's eyes. He chewed his thumbnail, wishing he hadn't said anything.

"Sasuke? On a date?" Itachi sounded incredulous.

"Yeah, that's what I thought."

Naruto stood, nudging his girlfriend with his toe as he stretched. She ignored him.

"So who's the lucky guy?" The man asked.

"He's…" Naruto paused. "The fuck?"

His eyes lingered on Sakura's form for a moment before he switched to his rusty Japanese.

"How they hell did you know he was into guys? Did he tell you before me, the bastard? I had to practically pry it out of his mouth!" He accused, jealousy creeping into his veins.

"He didn't tell me, Naruto-kun. You just did."

The jealousy turned to panic.

"Shit." Naruto swore. "If he brings it up, act surprised?" He pleaded, a hopeful edge to his voice.

"Don't worry." Itachi answered in his usual smooth timbre. "I've known about his sexual preferences since he was five years old."

"Seriously, Nii-chan?" Now Naruto was incredulous. "Five? How the hell did I miss that?"

"You are very dense, Naruto-kun."

The quite matter-of-fact tone of his voice cast an immediate frown upon Naruto's whiskered face. A serious of incoherent splutters escaped from his mouth.

"So about this man of Sasuke's…" Itachi prompted.

"Ah well, I can't say I'm his biggest fan." He responded, growing serious. "He seems like an OK guy. Just a bit… I dunno… unstable?" He supplied at last.

Naruto could hear Itachi take a deep breath on the other end of the line.

"Let me ask you something. Whom would you approve of for my little brother?" Itachi asked after a moment of pondering.

"What?" Naruto asked dumbly.

"What kind of person do you see with Sasuke?" The older man responded simply.

Naruto shrugged. "I don't know…"

"Think about it, would you?" Itachi requested.

"Uh… Sure." Naruto trailed off.

The fuck?

"Have Sasuke call me. Goodbye Naruto-kun."

The line went dead before Naruto could say another word.

Naruto grinned at Sakura, tossing the phone onto the couch as she stood.

"Itachi's such a weirdo."

"What did he say?"

Sakura chewed on her lip in a display of insecurity. He pulled her pink, winter cap over her head, dropping a chaste kiss on her lips. Lately kissing Sakura made him think of Sasuke. It was unsettling.

"He wanted to know what kind of person I think would be good for Sasuke." He responded, shrugging on his winter coat.

Sakura looked contemplative.

"Well, what do you think?" She asked.

"I don't know."

He sucked on the inside of his cheek, trying to imagine Sasuke's perfect lover. No, not his lover – his partner.

"I can't say I ever imagined Sasuke settling down." He admitted. "Though I guess it's inevitable."

If Naruto were truly honest with himself, he didn't _want_ to think about Sasuke settling down.

"I think he'd need someone incredibly happy." Sakura offered.

"Yeah." Naruto mumbled. "To keep him from being so damn gloomy all the time."

"And he'd need someone stubborn enough to break down his walls." Sakura added.

"And someone who's resilient and hard headed that could put up with his bitchy-ass mood swings." He muttered bitterly.

A giggle bubbled from Sakura's throat.

"True." She admitted. "Are you two fighting again?"

"No, he's just being a dick."

Sakura giggled again.

"Someone smart?" She suggested.

"Nah, not too smart." Naruto joked. "His superiority complex would get in the way."

"Be nice!" Sakura ordered with an outright laugh, punching her boyfriend in the shoulder.

"I guess what Sasuke really needs," Naruto grew pensive, "is someone dependable, someone really serious about him."

"Doesn't everyone?" Sakura asked.

"Well yeah, but more for him."

He laced his gloved fingers through hers.

"I'm not saying Sasuke isn't strong. I mean he'd been through more shit by age seventeen than most people face in an entire lifetime."

Naruto looked to the icy sidewalk, scuffing his toe on a patch of crusty snow.

"Inside the prickly exterior is a guy who's truly afraid of losing the people he loves." He continued. "I suppose that's also true for everyone, but consider that Sasuke feels personally responsible for everyone he's lost."

"You mean his parents?" Sakura's voice was soft in the chilled air.

Naruto nodded. "He still thinks he should have been able to do something."

"That's ridiculous!" she exclaimed. "There's no way an eight-year-old could have prevented those murders!"

"Clearly, but he doesn't believe it, not really."

Sakura frowned and a puff of white air flitted from her nose.

"On some level, I understand how he feels." Naruto continued. "I lost everything, too."

His eyes drifted to the eerie blue winter's horizon.

"But I dealt with it by holding on to as many connections as possible." He squeezed Sakura's hand. "While he deals with it by keeping everyone away."

Sakura hummed thoughtfully. "So you think Sasuke will never really open up?"

"No he will. He'll fall in love some day, but it will have to be with someone who is interested in forever."

Naruto's words felt sour in his mouth.

"I don't think Sasuke could stand putting emotional effort into something and then losing it. He'll need someone who understands that." He finished.

"So you're telling me," Sakura began, "that Sasuke needs a sunny, stubborn, flexible kind of girl, who is thick-headed and resilient, but ultimately loyal, dependable, with a divine amount of understanding, and serious about settling down."

"Something like that." Naruto's lips twitched into a smirk at that tall order.

"So basically, you think Sasuke needs… you." Sakura trailed off, face painted with amusement.

"Wha?!"

Naruto felt his heart suddenly slam against his chest.

"Or the female version thereof." She amended.

"Right…"

He took a deep breath, stilling his heart. They turned down the lane to Shikamaru's small house.

"That's a little freaky, Sakura." Naruto teased.

"The freakiest part is, that you're probably right." Sakura nudged him in the shoulder. "Your bromance is legendary. You're perfect for Sasuke."

"You know what." Naruto grinned, sweeping down to peck his girlfriend on the lips. "We're going to pretend we never had this conversation."

Sakura smiled brightly. "A little homophobic, are we?" She teased.

"Says the girl to the guy with two dads." Naruto quipped back, squeezing her hand a little tighter.

Her eyes were sparkling. Gods her smile was beautiful. The couple paused on the doorstep.

"You know…" Naruto continued. "Genma would be thrilled if I came home with a boyfriend." He paused taking a pensive breath. "Although neither of them care much for Sasuke."

Naruto swept a lock of pink hair away from Sakura's flushed cheeks. The smile faded from her eyes.

"Genma first met you after…" She exhaled deeply. "He's not my biggest fan either, and I understand."

Sakura looked like she was about to be sick.

"That was a long time ago."

"I'm still ashamed of the way I treated you back then." She admitted. "I'm just as responsible for what happened as Sasuke."

"Sakura," Naruto's voice was warm in the frigid air. "You saved me."

He took both of her hands in his and placed a delicate kiss on her knuckles.

"You were at my side everyday. Hell, without you and Iruka, I probably would have failed the eighth grade."

He tugged off his glove, cupping her cheek in his bare hand.

"And as if that weren't enough, you were my backbone when I came back to school. You were my best friend. Hell, until high school you were my _only_ friend – at the expense of your own social life, no less."

He lingered a millimetre from her lips.

"What on earth is there to be ashamed of?" He whispered.

Her lips crashed against his, and he felt himself washed away. Sakura's hands gripped his coat desperately as his fingers threaded into her soft, chilled hair.

_This_. Naruto thought. This was the Sakura he loved. He could feel the warmth of her tears collecting on his cheeks. And _this_ Sakura loved him fiercely in return. He ignored the doubt lodged somewhere in his oesophagus, that wondered why, with their bond that ran so deep, that overcame so much pain and spanned so many years, they couldn't always just be like _this_.

The door swung open in a violent wash of warm air.

"Are you guys coming in?!" An angry female voice demanded. "Or are you going to stand there snogging on Nara's porch all night?"

An imposing woman, none other than Miss Temari soon-to-be-Nara, stood at the door, hair alight in a messy blonde halo, illuminated by the warm glow of her fiance's home. She gave the blushing couple a wide grin as they shuffled through the door.

"Naruto, Shikamaru and I… well mostly I… anyway…" She began, her smile seeping into her voice. "_There is_ a surprise for you."

Naruto shot the woman a confused look, though she just grinned like the cat that ate the canary. His eyes flashed across the room, and he gasped. Next to Shikamaru, seated so nonchalantly on the sofa, he caught a shock of brilliant red hair and an uncharacteristically soft set of sea-foam eyes.

"Gaara." He choked.

* * *

><p>Gaara Sabaku first met Naruto when he was thirteen years old. When he saw this particular blond, seated listlessly on his bed, nose shoved in a book that looked suspiciously like porn, he had immediately wanted to punch the daylights out of him.<p>

Of course, that reaction wasn't terribly unusual back then.

"Hey." Gaara barked.

It wasn't really a greeting, more of a demand for attention.

The porn dropped to the boy's lap, and Gaara was met with a pair of empty blue eyes. The familiarity behind them made the young teen shiver. Those eyes simply blinked, waiting for Gaara to continue.

"I don't want a fucking roommate." He drawled in a sardonic sneer.

The boy shrugged, going back to his book.

"I said," Gaara repeated, losing patience "that I don't fucking want a fucking roommate."

"Move to another room, then." His voice was flat.

"I was here first, cocksucker." Gaara marched across the room with an aggressive gate.

The scrawny kid just shrugged.

"Not my problem." He mumbled into his book.

Gaara's eyes flashed and his lips stretched into a cruel smirk. How he was going to _enjoy_ breaking this one. Kid must be fucking suicidal to challenge him like that.

"What if I murder you in your sleep tonight? Just to see what your insides look like?" His voice took on a maniacal gleam.

The kid shrugged again, finally showing him another peak of his icy, rime filled eyes.

"Make it quick, would you?" The boy was completely uninterested in his threat.

Gaara blinked. It wasn't a challenge. It was a request. His gaze landed on a bandaged left wrist. Fuck, the kid actually _was_ suicidal.

This was not how this conversation was supposed to go. Gaara's vision was fading into red. He swung his fist wildly at the boy, pausing only millimetres from his cheek. The fucker didn't even flinch. Gaara snarled, reeled back, and decked him for real this time, albeit not as hard as he was originally intending.

The kid's head snapped to the side, and Gaara noted with some pleasure that a red mark was already appearing across his cheek.

Nothing, save a flick of his eyes.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?!" Gaara demanded, nonplussed, pressing his nose against a tan one.

The boy looked totally unfazed, didn't even bother to put down the trash he was reading.

"You think you're the first one to hit me?" He muttered. "Get over yourself."

"You think you're the only one with a rough life?!" Gaara felt something snap, and the words tumbled out of his mouth without his permission. "Get the fuck over _your_self!"

The blond boy blinked, and for the first time Gaara saw but a glimmer of those dazzling eyes he would grow to love. That was the only warning he got before a tan fist came flying out of nowhere and crashed into his right cheek. Gaara let out an inhuman roar and the two tumbled out of bed onto the chilled tile floor, in a disorderly ball of flying fists, knees and the occasional elbow.

It took three members of hospital staff to pry them apart. He cursed up a storm at a random hunky nurse, watching as the blond boy curled back in on himself, shame etched deep into his scarred face. The attending psychiatrist slammed the door open so hard the knob left a dent in the wall.

"What the hell is going on in here?!" She demanded, blonde hair flying wildly.

She was an intelligent woman by the name of Dr. Senju. Gaara probably would have liked her if a) he liked anyone, and b) he didn't view her as some sort of nemesis and prison guard.

Gaara watched in fascination as her hazel eyes widened.

"Naruto?" She gasped.

The boy said nothing. He turned his head in a blatant refusal to be acknowledged.

The woman took a hesitant step forward, raising her hand as though to touch him, but paused, squeezing her fist at her side. She shook herself visibly.

"And you Gaara!" She snapped, an objurgating tone darkening her voice. "I warned you about more fighting, young man."

She tapped her polished nails on her green cardigan.

"I don't see what else we can do besides send you to a detention facility."

Gaara felt panic rising from his gut, though he schooled his face to its usual 'like I give a fuck.'

"You can't keep attacking other patients…"

"'S not his fault." The blond interrupted in a dim voice, staring steadfastly at an unidentified spot on the wall.

"Excuse me?" She asked.

Naruto shifted his weight.

"I said it's not his fault." He repeated more clearly. "He insulted me and I hit him. It was reprehensible. It won't happen again."

He watched Dr. Senju's lips twitch into a tight frown. She wanted to say something.

"See that it doesn't." She finally snapped. "And I don't want to hear another peep out of you, Sabaku. Is that clear?"

"Crystal." He muttered with a roll of his eyes.

"Change Uzumaki to Dr. Kato's rounds. I can't see him." She ordered to the nurse on her way out the door. "He's basically family."

He watched the blond boy bristle at her comment with rapt fascination.

Later he would understand. Many years after that first meeting, when he was no longer that woman's patient, and she ceased to be Dr. Senju and became instead just Tsunade, she would confide in him her failure, and that the world had nearly lost its brightest star as a result.

Naruto, some months later, would say it wasn't her fault. He'd claim he had forgiven her, although he'd insist there was nothing to forgive – that she had her own demons to confront and she was in no way responsible for the actions of someone's random kid. He'd assure her he was fine now, healthier than before, even. Yet Tsunade knew better. He would always bear the scars of her transgression – and Gaara knew she wasn't referring to the scars that remained on his arm.

"You're a liar." Gaara growled as the staff faded from earshot.

Naruto gave him a flat glare.

"You want to go to juvie, be my guest."

Gaara crossed his arms over his chest in a huff.

"I still don't want a fucking roommate." He grumbled.

Naruto shot him a look of utter disbelief, as he got comfortable back on his bed.

"Then move, shit-for-brains!"

"I was here first, cocksucker." He insisted.

And Gaara saw the first hint of that smile that would one day take his breath away.

"Not. My. Fucking. Problem. Fucktard!"

Gaara would later learn that the only reason he _wasn't_ sent to juvie after the second, third, or perhaps fiftieth time he and Naruto got in a fistfight, was because Dr. Kato insisted that any emotional reaction out of Naruto was an improvement, even if it was anger. Besides, she told the hospital board, Gaara stopped attacking all the other kids.

* * *

><p>Dinner was amazing. Temari was a surprisingly good cook, and Naruto would have licked the gravy off his plate, had Sakura not elbowed him under the table as soon as the thought crossed his mind. She was a mind reader and it was freaky. Gaara didn't say too much, as per usual, but he didn't even once try to ignite Sakura with his glare from across the table. He was as amicable as could be expected from a guy who once stabbed a classmate with a fountain pen.<p>

A bottle and a half of wine later, and they even convinced the ginger-haired man to regale them with his tales from abroad. Naruto nearly fell off his chair when he recounted that once, in Rome, he accidentally ordered a plate of angry penis instead of penne arrabiata. That second 'n' is very important, you know.

The night was perfect. Yet Naruto was tense, and it set Sakura on edge.

The couple prepared to leave Shikamaru's with laughter on their cheeks and maybe a little too much wine in their bellies. On his way out the door, Naruto pulled Gaara into a suffocating hug.

"I missed you, dude." Naruto admitted.

Gaara was silent inside his arms.

"I know you don't exactly live close, but now that we're back in the same time zone, I hope we can see more of each other."

"Me too, Naruto."

It was simple and sincere, and it brought a gentle curve to Naruto's lips.

"You're heading back in the morning?" The blond asked, pulling away slightly.

Gaara simply nodded his head.

"All right. Take care. Drive safe. All that stuff."

He pulled his friend in for one final hug.

"See you guys!" He called, leaping off the porch after Sakura.

"Let's get you home, beauty!" He tugged her along the crusty sidewalk. "I'm freezing my nose hairs off!"

"Naruto, wait!" Sakura shrieked with laughter, trying to get traction on the slippery walk.

The man simply grinned, girlfriend in tow, slip-sliding his way to her apartment. The two collapsed in the entryway of Sakura's building, trying in vain to stifle their giggles, whispering in not-so-hushed tones about Naruto's catastrophic collision with a tree not three minutes ago.

Sakura yanked the man to her door by his sopping wet glove.

"Come on in." She ordered, depositing her icy gear on the floor. "I'll make us a pot of tea. You're going to catch your death."

Naruto's smile warmed her from the inside. No, _Naruto_ warmed her. He hovered behind her as she prepared the tea, carding his fingers through her damp hair. She leaned back into his large, safe chest. Naruto was just so much _fun_. Her cheeks ached from smiling, and her lungs burnt from the laughter that had echoed in the frozen streets. She sighed in contentment when his arms snaked around her shoulders. Naruto made her heart smile.

They sipped their tea at Sakura's tiny kitchen table, their feet tangling beneath it. She warmed her hands on the hot ceramic, blowing into the piping liquid. Naruto leaned forward and kissed her, chaste, his warm breath welcome on her frigid lips. He pulled away and returned cuddling with his mug. She felt the corners of her mouth tugging upwards.

As her unbidden thoughts turned to Sasuke, her smile faded. You couldn't think of one without the other – Naruto and Sasuke – Sasuke and Naruto – and she suspected that was part of the reason she couldn't just shake the damn boy. Gods. He was exotic and dangerous, with his cool eyes and sleek attire. He was a snake. He'd charmed her and devoured her whole. Her stomach still churned when she thought of him, twisting with anger, with resentment, and with the lust borne of the chemistry they'd once shared between the sheets.

Her face twisted into a grimace. Betrayal. Naruto never knew of their indiscretion, and she hoped he never would. There was no real reason to feel guilty; their trysts came to a screaming halt long before she'd even properly looked at Naruto. Yet she couldn't dispel the bitter burning that lingered beneath her skin. She doubted Sasuke had forgiven himself either– nor had he ever forgiven _her_.

She shook herself trying to physically clear her head. Sasuke was an ugly pit where all her happy thoughts went to die. Naruto, however… She lifted her willow eyes. So different from his lurid best friend. Naruto was beautiful, comfortable and warm, and he spread a little cheer everywhere he went.

When she looked at Naruto, really _l__ooked_, sometimes she was shocked to find a man, intelligent, imposing and powerful, where she expected to see that little boy who used to follow her until she punched him, or maybe that sad, scrawny teenager who became her best friend. She traced his chiselled visage. Much his concealer had leaked off into the snow, so the six horizontal scars across his cheeks were more visible than usual. Not that she minded. She hadn't just become used to the marks on his face, she'd grown to adore them. They seemed to belie a sort of feral masculinity that coiled inside his muscle and sinew.

His eyes were a world unto themselves, but this was something she'd always known. They were a sparkling kaleidoscope of blue, alive and dancing, shifting with every thought that skirted behind them. They were currently far away, however, turning in upon themselves in that exact shade of aquamarine that let her know he was pensive, worried. Those eyes worried a lot lately.

She rummaged around in his pant leg, until one pink-socked toe rested against his bare ankle. He startled, and with a blush, took her hands in his.

"I love you." She whispered, without a thought.

And she meant it. She didn't say it enough these days, but she did love him. He could take her breath away.

The worry began to melt from his eyes. He replied with that incandescent smile that never failed to make her heart shudder. His eyes spoke a devotion that she wasn't sure she deserved.

"I was thinking…" he cleared his throat, growing serious. "I was thinking about the first time you asked me to come in."

Sakura didn't like the way his hands were trembling.

"I was so surprised." He continued with a little smile, and she snorted in return.

"I don't know why." Her lips curled into a playful smile.

She felt the tension vanish from the air.

"I'd been sending you signals for months. Waiting for you to kiss me."

"I'd been waiting my whole life to kiss you," Naruto teased back. "Excuse me for being a little sceptical."

He stood and pulled his girlfriend to her feet in front of him.

"You were so beautiful," He ran one finger along the hollow of her chin. "In that apartment you shared with Ino. Standing there with your head tilted; just—like—so."

Sakura felt her heart quickening as she melted into Naruto's touch. She felt she might explode. His love was intense, and she found it a little terrifying.

"I was so nervous." He admitted. "I almost chickened out."

"_You_ were nervous?" Sakura snorted. "You seemed all cocky and confident, just like always. It was so sexy."

She leaned into Naruto's woollen sweater.

"I, on the other hand, was a total wreck. I couldn't say anything to you the whole way home from that party. I thought I was going to throw up."

Naruto laughed, and Sakura could feel the warm vibrations in his chest.

"I thought you were mad at me." He gave her another chuckle. "Just like always."

Sakura rolled her eyes, though Naruto's fingers remained on her chin, inching their way downward.

"Making love to you that night was a dream, Sakura."

His thumb stilled on the column of her throat.

"If I had known what an accomplished lover you were, I'd have asked you to come inside much sooner." She teased, voice growing thin and needy.

She felt her eyelids drooping as Naruto's grin flickered from adoring to lecherous and back again.

"Even as it was happening, I kept thinking I'd wake up in my bed."

Naruto's voice quaked under the strain of his emotions. His eyes devoured her, studying every detail.

"I was afraid I'd wake up alone. Afraid it would all have been a dream."

His fingers resumed their quest down – down – down.

"I wouldn't have cared to find that we hadn't slept together, although that part was amazing too."

Naruo's chin brushed against her forehead and down her cheek, his faint stubble scratching against her wind burnt skin. She could feel herself beginning to swoon as his lips neared hers, but he paused a breath away.

"I was afraid to discover, in my cold empty bed, that you'd never told me you loved me. Because _t__hat_ was my dream come true."

He finally captured her lips in a searing kiss, one that mimicked to every last detail, that first kiss they'd shared in a kitchen not so different from the one in which they were standing right now.

Sakura knees buckled beneath the weight of the kiss, and Naruto swept her into his arms and cradled her against his chest. He tiptoed through the small apartment to her bedroom and laid her out on her bed. She felt like a goddess under his eyes as he undressed her, worshiping every inch of her skin.

Her hands found his stomach, tracing the hard planes of muscle that had become so familiar to her fingers. A particularly delicate kiss to her pulse threw her back to that first night when she wondered why the hell it had taken her so long to find this man attractive.

After nearly four years, she knew this body well, but something in the air sparked the nervous excitement of that very first night. Her whole body was humming, and when he pressed inside of her, she could feel it in her toes.

He cocooned her against him as they rocked together, and she dug her manicured nails into his arms. She could feel his muscles taught beneath his skin, yet he cradled her delicately, as though she were Spring's first flower. A thought slipped through her hazed brain, slinking between each of her tingling fingertips. Naruto was holding back. He bridled that passion that already burnt so bright. It was with a hint of fear that she imagined the force of his love unchained. Just then, Naruto's clever fingers found that spot she loved so much and all coherent thoughts left her brain through the explosions going off behind her eyelids. Her cries rose to match the rhythm of the bedsprings and the gentle tap of the headboard against the wall.

They made love until nearly midnight. It was making love, Naruto thought, finally spent, as he pulled his equally exhausted girlfriend to his chest. Her body still trembled against him in the wake of the pleasure they had shared. He gave her every ounce of his heart, pouring every drop into hers.

"I love you." He whispered into her messy hair, not for the first time that night.

She gave him a tired smile returning his words against his kiss-swollen lips.

Gods, tonight reached an intensity they hadn't experienced for quite some time, if ever, and Naruto found it difficult to look away from those bright eyes staring back at him adoringly.

Naruto watched her toddle off to the bathroom on twitchy knees with no small amount of satisfaction. However, his grin vanished with the light that the bathroom cast into the hallway. Sakura was perfect. Tonight had been perfect, but he wasn't sure that was quite enough.

His fingers fumbled for the light switch. He dressed slowly, dread seeping into his heart through his toes. By the time Sakura returned from the bathroom, he was certain he was going to vomit on her rug.

Oh gods, she was wearing the pale pink nighty he'd gotten her for Valentine's Day last year. It was his favourite. She frowned as she entered her bedroom.

"Why are you dressed?" She asked, slipping onto her bed with a bounce. "It's not like I'm going to send you home at this hour."

She pulled him down next to her, and Naruto tucked her into his chest, kissing the top of her head. Her hair still smelt of her coconut shampoo. He could feel her sigh into him, as her fingers looped into his sweater. His heart hammered against hers.

"I had such a wonderful night tonight." She whispered into his neck.

"Me too." His voice was low and shaky.

He could feel her tense slightly in his arms. She knew him too well to miss his unease.

"Why..." Naruto's voice cracked and he swallowed. "Why can't it always be like that?"

Sakura pulled away from him as though she'd been burnt.

"Naruto." She began.

He could hear the twinge of panic bleeding into her voice.

"Do you really want to have this conversation now?" She finished, voice shaking slightly.

"No." He replied simply.

"Then stop." She ordered gently. "Take off your clothes, climb into bed beside me, and forget whatever you're thinking."

Naruto hung his head. Tempting. She was so warm.

"We need to have this conversation." His voice was but a mumble. "If not now, when?"

"Look, we're just having a rough patch." Sakura defended. "All couples have them."

Naruto nodded, but the crease between his brow didn't lessen. Fuck. He was really doing this, wasn't he?

"We'll get through it." She insisted.

His heart slammed in his chest, going about a million miles a minute. Hope. He tried to cling to that vague hope that this conversation would go well. His trembling muscles, the burning in his gut suggested otherwise.

"Will we?" His voice cracked again.

Sakura blinked. Her eyes were growing glassy.

With a sigh, Naruto turned to face her properly.

"We haven't been communicating well lately." He steadied his shaking voice.

"It can be fixed." She insisted.

"It can," Naruto agreed. "with a lot of work."

He gripped his jeans to still his hands.

"Or it could be indicative that something is going really wrong in our relationship."

"Naruto." Now Sakura's voice was breaking. "What are you saying?"

He sighed again and ran his hand through his sweat-grimed hair.

"Sakura Haruno, I love you." He stated, holding her watery vise.

"I love you too, Naru, you know that I..."

"But you don't understand." He interrupted. "Sakura, I want to spend my life with you."

Her protests died on her surprised lips. Naruto watched them move soundlessly, and he felt his heart shatter. He slammed his eyes shut, unable to bare the rejection he read in her eyes.

Fuck.

He thought for a moment that he really might be sick. His insides churned, and he swallowed a choke.

"Are you proposing?" Sakura asked, at last breaking the sullen silence

He opened his eyes, but he couldn't meet hers just yet.

"No." His hand brushed against her bare knee. "But I will if you want me to. It's where this is heading, Sakura."

She frowned. "Naru, if this is about that stupid schoolgirl attraction I have towards Sasuke, forget about it. It's only physical. It's not real."

"But is this real?" He asked, motioning between them.

She blinked. "I don't understand."

"Be honest, Sakura." He pleaded. "Are you with me because I'm the one you want to spend your life with, or because I'm comfortable? Are you just waiting to break my heart?"

He paused to let a shudder course through his veins.

"I know you love me, Sakura, but do you want to _marry_ me? Do you want to have a family with me? Build a life together?"

"I..." She began, tripping over her words. "I just don't know yet."

Naruto blinked back tears of his own. He withdrew his hand with a heavy sigh, dropping his chin to his chest.

"I'm not sure that's good enough anymore."

He heard Sakura's shaking gasp.

"Because if you don't know after almost four years, I think your answer is 'no.'"

He found that he couldn't continue.

"Naruto, are you..." Sakura took a shuddering breath. "Are you breaking up with me?"

He turned to her, finding tears that matched his own tracing her soft cheekbones. What he wouldn't give to take back everything he'd just said.

"I'm afraid so."

He wanted to tell her how much he loved her. Convince her he'd be a good husband in much the same way he'd convinced her to give him a chance all those years ago. Instead he pulled her shuddering form into his chest, and cried silently into her hair.

"Look, it's just not fair – to either of us." He stilled his sobs with a massive swallow. "If we're both stuck here being comfortable, we might miss something wonderful."

He knew he'd said the wrong thing when she pulled away, a flash of anger streaking through her eyes.

"Well maybe if your damn best friend wasn't trying to get between us all the time!" She accused.

"What on earth has Sasuke got to do with this?" He asked, genuinely confused.

"Tell me he doesn't." Sakura snapped. "Look me in the eyes and tell me he hasn't got at least something to do with this conversation."

Naruto blinked.

"He doesn't..." He began, searching her eyes.

He did, didn't he? Sasuke had been on his mind a lot lately, and in a strikingly unusual way. It was true that Sasuke had kissed him once before. When he found his friend behind that disgusting apartment in Tokyo, he'd been expecting a confrontation wrought with flying fists, not to find a tongue down his throat. And though he nearly soiled himself when it happened, he hadn't thought about that kiss in years.

Until now.

"I knew it." She bit.

"Come on, Sakura." Naruto defended his flatmate. "He never told me to do anything. He wouldn't."

"Of course he wouldn't. That's not how he works." The young woman all but snarled. "He's manipulative. He plants thoughts in your head and twists you around until you don't know which way is up anymore."

He had almost kissed his best friend. _Twice_. He found himself wondering, way too often than necessary, how Sasuke's kiss would feel now. Demanding? Aggressive? _Terrifying_?

Sasuke wouldn't manipulate him like that. Would he?

"He's controlling. You of all people should know this, Naruto. He's so possessive of you. It's like he has you in the palm of his hand!"

Naruto felt his pulse rising in an angry, poisonous red tide. He stilled his breath, but it was a losing battle.

"He's not possessive." The man retaliated "I know he's emotionally stunted, but he only acts the way he does because he doesn't want me to get hurt."

"And who is the one always hurting you? God Naruto, he's so fucking mean to you."

"I know he's mean Sakura. But he's not serious." Naruto defended, sounding pathetic even to himself.

"Listen to yourself. You sound like a battered wife."

Maybe his recent preoccupation with his best friend's lips was indeed at least a partial impetus for this conversation. As though it given him enough distance from Sakura to lend voice to his doubts. Yet, Sasuke wouldn't do something like that on purpose... right?

"Have you ever considered that maybe he wants to keep you insecure so you don't grow up and realise you're too good for him."

Sakura's lips were pursed to the side, and Naruto found himself wondering where all this anger had come from, and why the _fuck_ she hadn't said something sooner.

"That's not fair Sakura." He snapped. "He really does care..."

"I'm not sure he even knows how to care for someone." She retorted. "Word to the wise, Naruto. One day you're going to have to choose. He won't ever share you."

"What is that supposed to mean?" His voice was low and cold.

"It means you're never going to keep a girlfriend as long as he's lingering in the background. He can't stand to see you happy."

Naruto could not register the shock of Sakura's biting words. She was crazy about Sasuke. He had always known that. He felt like he'd stepped into some bizarre parallel universe. What the hell was going on?

"So you're really blaming all this on Sasuke?" Naruto demanded. "You don't love me, and it's all his fault?"

Naruto's voice was trembling. Hell, his whole body was trembling. He'd not felt so angry in a very long time. Angry and pathetic.

"Honestly, Sakura, it's hardly his fault you'd rather be with him than me."

Sakura recoiled visibly.

"Unless he's going around seducing you behind my back, he's been pretty clear about his feelings for you."

His threw his bitter words in her face. He watched as her green eyes widened in horror, and Naruto took a step back from himself.

"I'm sorry." He said with a sigh. "I shouldn't have spoken to you like that."

"Well I'm not sorry." Sakura defended, but her voice lost its bitter edge. "I'm sorry I lost my temper, but I'm not sorry about what I said."

Naruto threw up his hands in defeat.

"What do you want from me?" He demanded "Do you honestly expect me to listen patiently while you insult my friend?"

"I'm not insulting him." She met his intense gaze, not faltering even for the tears that kissed both of their cheeks. "I'm telling you the truth, and it's something you need to hear."

Naruto could read the sincerity in her eyes, so laced with anger.

"I know you think you're special. And goddamnit Naruto, you are." She continued, not giving him a chance to respond. "But you're not special to him. No one is."

"_You think you can stop me from leaving? You?!_"

"He's going to isolate you, just like before, so he can keep you all to himself. And someday when you haven't got anybody left, he'll get tired of you. He'll use you and throw you aside, just like he's done to the rest of us."

"_You're worthless._"

"Don't you dare look indignant. It's not like he hasn't done the exact same thing to you before."

"_You disgust me._"

"I know you think I'm just jealous that he still wants you around, and I don't know maybe I am. But that doesn't change the fact that Uchiha Sasuke is bad news."

She was wrong, Naruto told himself. She was angry and bitter and every bit as heartbroken as he was.

She clutched her quilt with her perfect nails.

Yet she believed every word she said. Sakura had her share of flaws, but dishonesty wasn't one of them.

Naruto felt the whole world tilt before him. He dropped his head, not knowing which way to run anymore. He'd tell her she was wrong until his lips turned blue, but he couldn't deny the strand of truth that weaved its way through her bitter admissions.

"_I hope I never see you again._"

"I'm sorry, Naruto." She whispered, as though her tirade had taken the last of her voice. "I'm sorry I had to say that, and I'm sorry it took so long to get it out."

She was disarming like that, all out of steam and pouting. She was actually pretty damn cute. With a heavy sigh, Naruto wiped the tears from beneath her eyes. Despite everything, she'd been roughly half his universe for more than ten years now.

"I'm sorry for everything." Her head fell heavily against his shoulder.

"It's not your fault, beauty. You're a good person." He rested his nose against her forehead. "We had a pretty good run. We didn't know if it would work at all."

"I really wanted it to work." Her voice disappeared into a small hiccough. "I don't want to break up."

"Me neither." He whispered, holding her against him one final time.

"I don't even know what to do without you." She admitted.

"I'll always love you, Sakura." He whispered to her cheek. "We will find other people, but you'll always be important to me."

Their lips found each other. Sakura's cheeks were warm and damp, and Naruto could feel her tears mingling with his as they shared this final moment of intimacy. He didn't want to leave her. Couldn't bare the thought of heading out alone into the bitter cold that awaited him. He poured the last of his love into the kiss and pulled away. Sakura whimpered slightly.

"I should go, beauty." He mumbled. "Or this won't stick."

Sakura remained mute, and Naruto headed to the door, his heart in his stomach and body numb. One final 'I love you,' and he was gone. He felt as though his life were over, as he left her there with tears in her bright green eyes. He couldn't feel the biting cold against his tears, couldn't hear the angry wind whistling through his ears. He felt empty, sick, and his body shuddered with sobs. It was as if the world were suffocating him, darkness overtaking all his senses. He collapsed into the snow halfway home.

Home. It was with much labour that he picked himself up. He had to get home. To Sasuke. He could mourn when he got home. The only thing on this planet he needed right now was his best friend. He knew he could survive the end of the world, if only he had Sasuke.

He needed to prove that Sakura was wrong. Sasuke wouldn't leave him.

He stumbled into the apartment, the words _tadaima_, – _I'm home_ – dying on his lips. Sasuke's shoes were absent. He leaned back against the door, fighting the wave of nausea that forced its way into his throat.

He should be glad Sasuke's date had gone well, evidently, but the thought wasn't without a pang of jealousy echoing inside his rib cage. With a sinking heart he headed to the couch, snagging that half-empty bottle of whiskey on the way.

Alone. Drinking alone on a Thursday night – Friday morning. Pathetic.

"_Worthless._"

That cruel voice whispered into his ear.

_"__You'll always be alone."_

He shook his head and downed a swig from his bottle. He gripped his hair so hard it stung.

"Shut up." He whispered to the empty night's air.

Sasuke hadn't abandoned him. He'd be home in a few hours at most.

Sasuke would return. He wasn't the kind of friend that expected Sasuke to be at his beck and call. That wouldn't be fair.

No, Sasuke hadn't abandoned him this time.

"_You disgust me_."

But he couldn't shake away the chill those blank black eyes had given him just that very morning.

Alone. Once again, Naruto found himself alone.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> So... Naruto's single?

Congratulations to those who saw it coming in this chapter. :)

What has Itachi got up his sleeve? What made Naruto suicidal, and what has Tsunade got to do with it? Will Naruto ever learn of Sakura and Sasuke's affair? And will Sasuke ever be able to stem the doubts Sakura has planted in Naruto's brain?

Next chapter we'll FINALLY see some interaction between our two favourite boys. We'll meet a pretty blonde and Naruto's "shaggy bartender friend." Maybe we'll even get to meet Naruto's dads.


	8. Chapter 8

**Author's Note: **I'm late. Very very late. Like is anyone still reading this story, late. :-/

So this isn't really a new chapter, but I did add a very long scene, and cut out most an old one, on a very good piece of advice from the lovely reveiwer, Bridmatt. Thank you, and you were totally right. :-)

Thank you for all your kind reviews. I listen to every critique.

Without further ado, a slightly revamped Chapter Eight:

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter Eight<strong>

The walk of shame was by no means unfamiliar to one Uchiha Sasuke. He was pleased to discover, however, that there weren't too many other shamers out there at the crack of dawn on a frigid Friday morning. He snagged that perfect six AM bus that left him only a hundred metres from his apartment. It was a good thing, too. The activities of the night before had left him aching, walking with an obvious limp in his gait. While this was also not terribly unusual, for some reason, Juugo's roughness had left him feeling uneasy about the night they shared. He shook it off, stifled a yawn, and tiptoed to his door, careful not to disturb his slumbering neighbours.

He pushed inside and came to a dramatic halt. Naruto was passed out on the couch, a fluffy orange cat tucked into his arms. If he weren't so annoyed with Naruto at the moment (or more specifically, his reaction thereto), he would have found it endearing. He was snoring softly, but he hadn't been asleep long, if the open laptop on the coffee table, still streaming some stupid sitcom, was any indication.

The thought that Naruto might have been waiting up for him sent a wave of butterflies wafting through his stomach. He murdered them instantly. What kind of right did Naruto have to concern himself with the hours he kept? With a roll of his eyes, Sasuke shed his coat and closed and locked the door behind him.

Kyuubi, ever the sweet and helpful lump of fat, chose that very moment to sneeze, right in Naruto's face.

The man snorted awake.

"Aww, what the hell Kyu." He whined through his yawn.

Sasuke could hear one solitary purr, even across the room.

He froze mid-step as Naruto groaned and sat up, one tan hand running though his snaggly blond locks.

"S'ke?" He slurred, squinting into the dark.

Sasuke glared at him, though it dawned on him that Naruto probably couldn't see his expression.

"Clearly, dumbass." He bit. "Who else?"

Naruto stood on unsteady feet, hoisting his fluff ball over his shoulder.

"How was your night?" The man asked cheerfully, but Sasuke could hear the strain that caused his voice to waver. "Hope you had a good time." He prompted.

Sasuke didn't respond. A large part of himself wanted to confide his troubles in the other man, maybe get some perspective. He couldn't – not it he wanted to maintain some emotional space. Now that Naruto was close enough, he peered at him from under his eyebrows in a glare that told the blond that his evening was not a topic up for conversation.

Naruto frowned, rolled his eyes, and shuffled toward his bedroom door.

"Oh, hey!" He paused, balancing the cat as he turned. "'Tachi called. Wants you to call him back."

Sasuke put one hand on his hip. He found a lingering shred of anger and pulled it out of his veins, letting it cloak his tongue with ugly, black words.

"Why the hell did Itachi call you?" He demanded.

"Ah." Naruto scratched the back of his head sheepishly. "He didn't. You left you cell phone here, so..."

"So he could have left a message." Sasuke snapped. "Do you think it's OK to answer my mobile phone?"

Naruto winced, and Sasuke bit back the urge to take back his words.

"Sorry, I thought it could be important." He explained, scratching his ankle with his toe. "And I haven't talked to him in a really long time, and…"

"And what?" Sasuke interrupted.

Naruto backed away, blue eyes wide.

"If Itachi wanted to talk to you, he'd call you."

Sasuke tried to ignore how vulnerable Naruto looked in that very moment. He bit the inside of his cheek.

"I'm sorry Sasuke, I didn't realise..." He stuttered.

"Don't shove yourself into our lives, moron. He's not _your_ brother."

This should be just about that tipping point at which Naruto would tell him to go fuck himself, slam his bedroom door, and refuse to speak to him for at least three hours. Sasuke frowned. It wasn't happening. His idiot was just standing there looking heartbroken.

"I mean Jesus Christ, dumbass. Haven't you ever heard of a little space?" He continued.

Almost there. He watched Naruto's eyes flicker.

"Why do you have to be so damn clingy? You're just going to end up all alone."

He waited with pinched lips for the angry retort that would never happen. All expression fell from Naruto's face as though he had flipped a switch.

"I'm sorry, Uchiha." It was an earnest, but monotone apology. "It won't happen again."

That blank, dead-eyed expression looked so foreign on Naruto's bright face, and Sasuke found it disturbing. More disturbing, Sasuke thought, was how easily the other man could switch off his emotions. He knew from experience that such a feat took practice, and lots of it. Despite that fact, it was something Sasuke had never once seen cross those blue eyes.

The man slipped silently through his door.

"Naruto, wait." Sasuke called, with his heart in his toes, but the man's door had already clicked behind him.

Sasuke felt a chill in his heart that cocooned his chest with tiny fingers.

"Fuck." He swore silently, pressing the heels of his hands into his eyes.

There were parts of himself that Naruto hid from the world, even from Sasuke. Parts that belonged to that painful past that Sasuke wasn't privy to, and all on account of himself. Naruto was a bright, sunny ball of cheer and everything nice. He wasn't supposed to have any darkness inside of him. He wasn't supposed to be insecure or timid, nor apologise when Sasuke was being an asshole. Finding Naruto so terribly human was shocking.

He'd done a swell job of vilifying his flatmate these days, calling him out for being distant, as though he had done nothing to push the idiot away. It was a miracle Naruto still hung around.

Feeling incredibly juvenile, he flopped onto the very spot on the couch his flatmate had just vacated. The man's warmth still lingered, and the pillow smelt of lavender and that musky lime aftershave Naruto liked to use.

Sasuke was such a destructive person. He only wanted a little emotional space. He scrubbed at his face. Sometimes, he felt like his annoying, immature best friend was the only one who had done any growing up in the past decade.

"Fuck." He repeated.

* * *

><p>At the other end of the apartment, Naruto lie face first on his bed, feeling like the air had gone out of the room. He gripped his pillow in silent sobs, feeling every bit as worthless as Sasuke had once called him.<p>

There he'd gone and pushed everyone away again.

Naruto bit his pillow to keep from sobbing. He wanted to disappear. A loneliness he hadn't felt in years began to consume him. His fingers itched to _do something_.

No.

He took a shuddering breath.

He wasn't alone.

Iruka's gentle smile flashed in front of his eyes. It wasn't like before. Genma popped up beside him with his stupid, superior smirk. Then there was Kiba's grinning face, and Nara and his fiancée, and not the least of which Gaara. Shizune Kato, and maybe even Kakashi and Tsunade. The faces of his family and friends streamed by in a whirlwind of colours and smiles.

He could do this. He didn't have to hurt himself. He could do this. Even if it was just one breath at a time.

* * *

><p>Uchiha Sasuke faced his first day of kindergarten with a brave face. It wasn't every day a child moved to a new country – a new <em>continent<em>, but he promised his brother he wouldn't cry. Probably.

His mother kissed his cheek in the principal's office and wished him well. He then caught sight of the biggest pair of watery blue eyes he'd ever seen watching their interaction – not that he'd seen too many pairs of blue eyes at that point, but they were stunning nonetheless. He quickly pushed his mom away and wiped the kiss from his cheek.

She smiled and greeted the newcomer in English. The boy returned her greeting with vigour to spare, his sad look melted into the brightest smile he'd ever seen.

"Sasuke." His mother nudged him forward with her knee. "Introduce yourself."

The little boy beat him to the punch.

"I'm Naruto!" He chirped.

He then bumbled on about a mile a minute, exactly zero of which Sasuke understood. He paused, obviously expecting Sasuke to say something. The tiny Uchiha gave his mother a bewildered look.

"Your name." She translated.

"Sasuke." He muttered, glaring at a stain on the carpet.

Naruto grabbed his hand and marched them off to their classroom, the principal on their heels. Sasuke snatched his hand back in front of the door.

"_Itai_!" He snapped, rubbing his wrist. _Ouch_!

The scrawny boy must have caught his drift, because he responded with a sheepish look and a "Sorry!" One of the few words Sasuke knew.

"_Dobe_." He muttered under his breath.

Their teacher was a smiley woman with crooked teeth. She introduced them to the class, then directed them to the empty desk in the corner. Or that's what Sasuke gathered, as Naruto seized his hand and pulled him – more gently this time – to the desk and plopped down.

Apparently it was Naruto's first day too. The sunny little boy looked a little lost himself most of the time. The teacher explained everything to the two. Naruto simply pulled Sasuke along and did everything for him. By the third day, when Sasuke could pick his own milk up from the cooler, thank you very much, he was torn between wishing the kid would just leave him alone, and being glad there was someone looking out for him – even if it was a noisy, little twerp.

On day five, Sasuke learnt the phrase, "Go away."

Naruto looked like he'd kicked his puppy. His lip quivered and he stomped away, joining the other kids in their game of tag.

As the other little boy's laughter lit up the playground, Sasuke felt like he couldn't breathe. He rested his chin on his knees, and tried to appreciate his quiet little corner for once. Even though the boy couldn't understand very much, Naruto talked to him constantly. He'd pause sometimes, waiting for a reply, simply to continue to fill the silence like nothing happened. He was pretty sure the other kids thought he was stupid. Naruto, too, probably, even though he didn't show it.

"_Dobe_." He muttered, again.

Naruto didn't talk to him again for the rest of recess.

The bell rang, and the troupe of kindergartners had to line up with their buddies to trudge back to their classroom. Naruto took their place at the end of the line, but didn't grab his hand.

Sasuke frowned. Naruto always took his hand.

One of the boys asked him a question. Probably something about why he didn't join the rest of the class in their game.

"Sasuke's _mean_." A girl with pigtails concluded.

The tiny Uchiha understood the word mean. He chewed on the inside of his cheek to keep from crying. They couldn't understand him anyway. How could he explain to any of them know how it felt to be completely uprooted? He hardly had the words to express himself in Japanese. He just knew he felt… lost.

"He's not mean." Naruto defended.

Sasuke turned to see Naruto standing defiantly, his little chest puffed out.

"He's just really shy."

Naruto kept speaking, but Sasuke didn't catch whatever it was. It must have worked however, because the sea of tiny, angry faces turned sympathetic. The teacher blew her whistle, and the kids toddled toward the school, two by two, their conversation completely forgotten. The little, blue-eyed boy marched ahead, his eyes trained forward.

Sasuke looked at the boy's little hand. His eyes dropped to the sidewalk, and he silently slipped his fingers between the tanned ones. He clenched his teeth, waiting for the other boy to rip his hand back. He knew he would have. He heard the boy suck in his breath.

"You _are_ a little mean sometimes." Naruto muttered, but he didn't pull his hand away.

Sasuke heaved a giant breath, chewing on his thumbnail.

"I…" He paused. "I know."

"Boys, be quiet." The teacher scolded.

"Sasuke started it!" Naruto accused.

"Did not!"

"I don't care. Naruto, be quiet." She chided. "Sasuke," and her words were lost in a tumbling mess.

Naruto waited until she turned back around to pull Sasuke's thumb out of his mouth.

On day fourteen, Sasuke got a fever. It was a bad one, and he didn't go to school on day fifteen either. He hoped Naruto was doing all right. The boy could talk to anyone for hours, but he was so much littler than everyone, that sometimes the other kids picked on him. In the late afternoon, he heard a knock on his bedroom door.

He was stunned to see a shock of blond hair sticking out from behind a pile of books. Itachi had his hand on his shoulder, nudging the little boy forward.

"Go on." He urged.

Naruto set the books on Sasuke's desk.

"Um…" he began, turning a little red. "_Odaijini_?" _Take care._

His pronunciation was a little funny, but close enough. Sasuke had to collect his chin from his pillow. He scooted over a little, so Naruto could join him on his bed. He squeezed his eyes shut as tight as he could. He didn't know why his chest felt like it was about to burst, and it was making his eyes burn. Sasuke refused to cry with his older brother in the doorway.

"Why?" He squeezed out.

"Why, what?" Naruto looked genuinely confused.

Sasuke shrugged. "Just why?"

The blond's little face lit up. "Because you're my best friend."

Sasuke couldn't contain his tears anymore, and he buried his face in Naruto's shoulder.

"Hey Itachi." Naruto asked. "What does _dobe_ mean?"

His brother laughed and Sasuke punched his new best friend in the stomach.

On roughly day thirty, though Sasuke had nearly lost count by this time, their class made Mother's Day cards. The teacher wrote "Happy Mother's Day" on the board, and told them they could draw whatever they wanted. He was almost finished with his card when he was certain he heard Naruto sniffling.

"Are you OK?" He whispered.

The little boy nodded, but didn't look up.

Their teacher crept towards their desk. "Naruto, sweetie," she prodded. "What's wrong?"

She carefully pulled his card from beneath his head. She made a choking noise when she opened the card. She scooped the sobbing boy into her arms.

"We'll be right back." She said in an overly sweet tone, her feet halfway to the door. "Keep working on your cards and stay quiet." She ordered.

The card fluttered back onto their desk. Sasuke picked it up. On the front was crudely drawn picture of a woman with red hair – literally red – flying wildly around half the page. Her smile was bigger than her face. Sasuke had never met Naruto's mother, but he wouldn't be surprised to find that to be a rather astute likeness of that smile.

Even Sasuke's heart broke when he opened the bright orange card. Inside was drawn a grey rectangle that said Mommy in the black block letters he'd copied from the board. He wrote 'I MIS YOU,' turning the O into a big, red flower. Sasuke had never been to a western cemetery, but it wasn't difficult for him to understand the picture. He felt his own eyes burning.

"Was Naruto crying?" Someone asked.

"Yeah," a little girl responded. "He's such a baby."

There was a murmur of agreement through the class.

"Shut up!" Sasuke demanded.

The class turned to face him with open mouths.

"You'd cry too if your Mommy died."

The class had never head Sasuke speak so many words in a row before. They sat in shocked silence, probably surprised the boy could speak at all.

"You'd probably cry every day." Sasuke continued, clutching the card to his chest. "And he's almost always smiling."

Naruto didn't return to class until recess.

The little girl who insulted him approached with her hands shoved in her pockets.

"I'm sorry." She mumbled. "I'm sorry you don't have a mommy anymore."

"It's OK." He gave her a sad smile. "My godfather is pretty cool."

"Are you OK?" Sasuke asked, glaring at the little girl until she ran away.

Naruto plopped down in the sandbox and smiled up at his friend.

"Yeah." Naruto drew circles in the sand "They gave me ice cream."

"Yuck."

"You're weird." The blond boy accused.

Sasuke shrugged.

Naruto was silent for a moment. "Chouji told me what you said."

Sasuke could feel his cheeks heating.

"Sasuke," Naruto asked. "How do you say 'best friend' in Japanese?"

"_Shin'yuu_." Sasuke smirked. "But it's better if I call you _usuratonkachi_."

* * *

><p>Sasuke awoke late for the second time in as many days. He threw the blanket to the floor and hopped to his feet. Wait, blanket? He blinked. Jesus Christ, even when Sasuke was being an asshole, his flatmate couldn't avoid being the nicest human being on the planet. Some kind of masochist or something.<p>

Sasuke rushed through the empty apartment, throwing one longing look at the shower. He snagged his cell phone from its resting place on the coffee table, noticing for the first time the empty bottle of Jack on the otherwise innocent table top. He winced. Naruto didn't usually whip out the old Tennessee sour mash unless he was really feeling gloomy.

Damn. As if he needed to feel worse about his behaviour. With a heavy sigh, he trudged out the door to start his day.

Some six hours later, Sasuke sat in his office, running his fingertips over his mobile phone for the twentieth time in the past half hour. Normally, when he and his flatmate had a disagreement, Naruto would send him a chipper text. He would ask about dinner or some other inane topic, just to let him know he was forgiven, and proceed to bombard him with his usual nonsense about every quarter of an hour. Today, however, Sasuke's phone remained eerily silent. He'd have to make amends this time, and he doubted a text about lasagne was going to cut it.

With a sigh, he closed his textbook, clearly unable to absorb any of the information therein. He prayed for anything to distract him from the monotony that was Friday afternoon office hours.

His prayer was answered not three seconds later, when his office door swung open, although the dramatic entrance to the story of Ino Yamanaka was not exactly what he had in mind. She was small and blonde and cute and happy, and probably would have made a perfect girlfriend for Naruto in another life. He glared at her, not because she would have looked so cute hanging on his flatmate's arm, but rather because of the person's arm whom she _did_ often cling to: Sakura Haruno. Not like that, you perverts, they were best friends – worst rivals, and besides, Ino was dating an aspiring chef called Chouji.

"Don't give me that look, Uchiha!" She demanded, stretching to her full, five foot three and three quarters. "I know I'm a gossip, but I swear I'm not engaging in any espionage here."

He peered at her from under his eyebrows.

She plopped on his desk, right on top of a stack of his meticulously organised note cards.

"Sakura won't even know I'm here." She continued. "I'm honestly just worried about Naruto."

Sasuke blinked.

"Well, you know..." She looked a little sheepish. "Sakura let on that Naruto can have some pretty low lows, if you know what I mean."

Sasuke didn't know what she meant.

"I though I'd drop by and check on him, but he wasn't in his office, and he's not answering his phone..."

Sasuke raised one eyebrow.

"I thought he might be here, but at the very least you'd know how he's doing."

She raised her own pretty, little eyebrows, waiting not-so-patiently for Sasuke's response. She must have sensed his confusion, not that he was making any effort to conceal it, because she gave him a dramatic deadpan.

"He didn't tell you."

Sasuke felt as though the world were suddenly spinning very fast.

"Tell me what?"

Ino shot him a toothy grin. "You know, I should really go."

She inched toward the door, but Sasuke made a grab for her slim shoulder.

"Tell me _what_, Yamanaka?" Sasuke repeated with a little chill in his voice.

"Look, Uchiha, if he didn't tell you last night, that's his business. I'm not really in any position to say."

"I didn't go home last night." Sasuke interrupted.

It wasn't entirely a lie.

"Oh." Ino sighed, casting a furtive glance at the door.

She swept her long, flaxen locks out of her eyes, and let them settle softly in the exact same position. She bit her lip and sighed again.

"Jesus, no wonder people think I'm a gossip." She muttered. "And if he gets mad at me for telling, you'd better say it was under duress!"

"Just tell me already." Sasuke snapped.

"Fine, fine!" She huffed. "Naruto broke it off with Sakura last night."

Sasuke froze, his hand slipped from Ino's shoulder. Well that was unexpected.

He felt something ugly coiling in his stomach, and it felt a lot like shame. At least it explained the Jack.

"Wait." He looked at Ino sideways. "_He_ broke up with _her_?"

"Apparently." The young woman shrugged. "Sakura's still in shock. She didn't even come to class today."

Sasuke frowned, dialing Naruto's number without a second thought.

"Hi!" Naruto's friendly voice greeted him.

Sasuke was about to speak when the voice continued. "Most likely, I'm either asleep, or I've lost my phone again. Please leave a message and I'll get back to you!"

He clicked off the call and shook his head, feeling sick to his stomach.

"Well, I guess I'll head to Kiba's pub." Ino suggested. "He works early on Fridays."

"I'll go." Sasuke responded, shoving his belongings in his bag.

Ino pursed her lips.

"Yeah." She relented. "He probably doesn't want to see me anyway. Let me know when you find him, will you?"

Sasuke nodded and hurried out the door, futility calling the man's phone again, just for good measure. He made it to Naruto's favourite bar in record time, even after swinging by the gym on the way. He heaved a massive breath as he entered the building, thankful he worked out on a regular basis.

A slim, shaggy-looking bartender looked up from the textbook he was reading. He pushed his wild brown hair away from his eyes.

"Uchiha." He greeted with a canine smile. "What can I do you for?"

Sasuke's eyes swept the near-empty pub. No sign of blond hair anywhere.

"You haven't seen Naruto, have you?"

Kiba frowned.

"I sure haven't." He rummaged under the bar for his phone. "What's up?"

Sasuke sighed, no wonder gossip could travel so fast.

"Is something wrong?" The other man prodded.

The Uchiha heaved a shrug.

"He and Sakura broke up." He replied simply. "He isn't answering my calls. I was worried."

Kiba's chin practically dropped to the wooden counter. He seized phone.

Sasuke's heart hammered in his ears and his anxiety mounted.

The other man shook his head. "No answer."

Sasuke's heart dropped to his toes, his brain scrambling for ideas.

That park with the swans and the tacky gazebo? He could even be back at the apartment by now. Maybe he'd gone _home_-home for the weekend?

For the first time _ever_ he wished he had Iruka's mobile phone number.

"Ah, there we go." Kiba said several moments later. "He's sent a text."

"Did he say where he was?"

Sasuke couldn't keep the edge of panic from his voice. He decided he didn't care.

"He did." The man replied.

Sasuke gave him an imploring look.

"He's fine." Kiba coughed and scratched the back of his head. "But, you wouldn't happen to know anything about this text I received this morning?"

Kiba scrolled through his phone and flashed the screen in front of his face.

_Hey bro, can I crash on your couch for a couple of days next week? Driving my flatmate batty._

Sasuke felt himself wincing. It wasn't normal for Naruto to actually give him physical space. He wondered if he hadn't already done irreparable damage to their friendship.

"Look, Uchiha." Kiba began. "I know we don't know each other very well, but Naruto's like a brother to me."

Kiba dropped his elbows against the bar.

"It's not that I care that he stays over when you two fight, but you don't see how much it upsets him."

"I'm trying to apologise." Sasuke sighed. "I can't do that if I don't know where he is."

"Just remember." Kiba pursed his lips. "Naruto's got an enormous heart, Uchiha, and a big piece of it's for you. You'd better damn well appreciate it."

* * *

><p>Fifteen minutes later found Sasuke bursting through the library doors. The student worker behind the front desk sent him a scathing look – which he patently ignored. He poked around the towering shelves until he found the blond in question, tucked away into a secluded corner behind the philosophy stacks.<p>

He had his textbooks spread across the table, his laptop roaring, and a notebook out, but he didn't look like it was doing much good. At the precise moment that Sasuke rounded the corner, Naruto was attempting to balance a fat, green highlighter vertically on his nose.

Relief washed through him, and he couldn't stop the smile that clawed its way to his lips. Damn, he had it bad. He could already feel the warmth returning to his toes.

He sat down gingerly in the chair across from Naruto. Those brilliant eyes met his. The highlighter dropped to the table, the click swallowed by the tomes of books and the ugly, ancient carpet.

Naruto's face remained blank and Sasuke felt some of that panic resurface.

"I'm..." Sasuke cleared his throat. "I'm sorry."

There, that wasn't so bad.

"You don't have to be sorry for something you meant."

Naruto's voice was neutral. Sasuke felt that familiar cold leaking into his bones.

"But I didn't." Was his voice shaking? "I didn't mean it. I had a bad night. I took it out on you. I know it doesn't excuse what I said, but for what it's worth, you didn't deserve it."

Naruto gave him a dead look.

"Please Uchiha. It's not like it's the first time you've told me to bugger off."

The man began packing his things into his backpack.

"I get it. I'm too much. I'll leave you alone."

This could be it, Sasuke realised. If he didn't fix it now, this could be that life-changing moment in which Naruto waltzed away forever.

Sasuke gripped a tan wrist. He realised for the first time that Naruto was trembling as well.

"You are too much, Naruto."

He raised his eyes to meet watery blue. His grip tightened as the other man attempted to yank his arm away.

"But so are Itachi, Karin, Suigetsu, and Kakashi." He continued. "And that's the grand total of people on this Earth who give a damn about me."

Naruto cocked his head, as though he were afraid to hope. He was positively adorable.

"Naruto, I..." Sasuke paused, brow furrowing.

What the fuck was he going to say?

'I know you're straight, but let me try to change that.' 'I fear you're the reason I wake up in the morning?' Or god forbid, 'I love you.'

Sasuke shook his head with a bitter snort. Yeah, that wasn't out of character.

"Without annoying, stubborn, intrusive people, I'd be alone."

He watched his flatmate deflate.

"That's got to be the shittiest apology I've ever heard."

Sasuke felt his lips curling upward, reflecting the gentle grin his flatmate was giving him.

He shrugged. "As I remember, you declared me your best friend, not the other way around. You've only got yourself to blame."

Naruto's posture loosened and his hands seemed to have lost the majority of their tremor.

"I was five, I didn't know what I was getting into."

Sasuke only offered another shrug.

"I'm pretty sure I told you to fuck off then, too." He defended.

Naruto responded with a dramatic roll of his eyes.

"You only spoke Japanese. How the hell was I supposed to know what you were saying?"

The man finished dumping his belongings into his bag and stood, pulling Sasuke to his feet. The Uchiha looked into those wide, blue eyes, noticing for the first time the _exhaustion_ that was etched deep inside. Sasuke's fingers gripped his flatmate's shoulder.

"You're not alone." He mumbled, sincere and embarrassed.

He averted his eyes. This was the apology he so articulately failed to convey earlier.

"You'll never be alone." Sasuke continued, hoping Naruto would catch his drift without actually having to voice it.

He suddenly found himself engulfed in Naruto's bulky arms. The man pressed his face into his neck, and he could feel his silent tears sliding against his skin. A sharp tinge of shame twisted at the base of his spine, knowing that those tears weren't just for Sakura. He wrapped his arms around his big idiot with a heavy sigh.

"Come on, moron." Sasuke brushed him off. "I still have Love Actually on my computer, from when you forced me to download it at Christmas."

Naruto gave him a bewildered look.

"That's your thing, right?" Sasuke shrugged, embarrassment burning on his cheeks. "Sappy movies and ice cream."

The other man nodded, wiping his face with the back of his sleeve.

"Well, I refuse to watch any other romantic comedy not directed by Woody Allen." Sasuke huffed. "Although I still think your way of grieving is terribly girly."

Naruto snorted.

"I learnt how to deal with grief from girls." He huffed back. "And Woody Allen isn't even funny."

Sasuke gave him his favourite superior smirk and turned on his heal, tugging his flatmate along by his hand.

"He is funny, in a cerebral kind of way."

"That defeats the point of comedy, damnit!"

That emotional equilibrium seemed much less important now. Besides, he'd once gone half a world away to avoid this man. If half of the Earth couldn't keep the idiot from his mind, he wasn't sure anything could.

Sasuke pushed through the heavy library doors and into the cool winter's afternoon. The air was crisp, but the sky bright, and the snow had nearly melted. Winter was far from over, but a wash of spring hung in the air. He pinched back a genuine smile. If Naruto noticed they were all but holding hands as Sasuke marched him across campus, he certainly wasn't protesting. A warmth bubbled inside of his chest that spread to the very tips of his toes.

* * *

><p>It was the crick in his neck that aroused Naruto from his dead slumber. His whole body ached, and he felt sick and empty inside.<p>

Right.

It's funny how your body knows you're heartbroken even before your brain has time to catch up.

He let escape a wide yawn, and snuggled into that warm and fuzzy something that smelled exactly like Sasuke.

Wait.

What?

His eyes flew open. He found himself rolled up on the couch, his head resting on a pillow in his flatmate's lap. He'd somehow even snuggled his nose right into Sasuke's navel.

He yawed again. The last thing he remembered was Sasuke putting on the film. Exhaustion had apparently overwhelmed him and he collapsed face first into a –very comfortable actually – woollen sweater. If he weren't so out of it, Naruto might have had the decency to blush.

He peaked hesitantly up at Sasuke. The man, with his feet kicked up on the coffee table, had his nose stuck in a book, blissfully unaware of his observer down below. It was nice, this spot in his flatmate's lap. Sasuke had one arm slung casually across his back, moving ever so slightly, just to turn the pages. It almost felt like Sasuke was holding him. The thought made Naruto feel uncomfortably tingly; made that emptiness feel a little more manageable, and he couldn't quite seem to squish the bubble of joy that burst at the thought of his protective best friend.

So, Sakura didn't love him, not in that forever kind of way, at least. The life he had been planning had come completely unraveled in the past few weeks. It _hurt_. Damn, it hurt. Yet, oddly, Sakura's rejection didn't sting quite as badly as he had expected. He made the right decision.

He'd passed the day thinking he'd lost both his girlfriend _and _his best friend. With Sasuke back in his corner, he felt that his life would keep going. Indeed, here in Sasuke's arms, he felt that Sakura's love was a wound that was already healing.

Yeah, that probably wasn't normal.

Black eyes met his, and Sasuke startled. Naruto grinned.

"Jesus, idiot!" He swore, retracting his arm with a surprised jerk. "I thought you were asleep."

Naruto let his eyes flutter shut.

"I am." He mumbled, stifling yet another yawn into the soft wool.

He could feel Sasuke's arm settle hesitantly around him once more, and Naruto found himself smiling once more. His flatmate could be so damn cute when he wasn't trying.

Naruto chanced another peek at his prickly friend. People look a bit funny from below, and Sasuke was no exception. He was stiff now, the awkwardness painted across his furrowed brow. He had never been terribly comfortable allowing anyone to breach his personal space, yet he didn't push Naruto away.

Sakura's words floated through his ears.

Sasuke did care about him. Right? He must. Otherwise, he wouldn't indulge Naruto's cuddly needs. It was clear he was well past his monthly contact quota if his twitching left brow was any indication.

That said, she wasn't entirely wrong. Sasuke wasn't very good at sharing, that part was certain. He'd always been suspicious of Naruto's other friends, of all his girlfriends, and Sakura hadn't been the first to complain.

Naruto frowned. Would he have to choose, one day, between love and his bond with Sasuke? The idea made his stomach lurch.

Those eyes met his again, but this time they looked worried.

Naruto gave him his best stupid grin.

Sasuke responded with a sceptical arch of one slender brow. Guess he was a little more perceptive than he let on.

"Whatever you're thinking about, idiot, stop." Sasuke ordered. "You're not going to get anywhere sighing like that."

"I'm just looking up your nose." Naruto explained. "Did you know your right nostril is slightly bigger than your left one?"

He was suddenly and unceremoniously dumped off of Sasuke's lap.

"Noooo!" He whined dramatically, clinging to the sweater with all his might. "You're so comfy!"

He rubbed his cheek along Sasuke's shoulder.

"Is this cashmere?"

Sasuke rolled his eyes, nudging him away with his pointed elbow.

Naruto stretched, working out the kinks in his muscles.

"Sorry I passed out on you." He apologised. "How long was I out?"

Sasuke shrugged. "A couple of hours."

The blond man bolted upright.

"Are you serious?!"

Sasuke shrugged again. "You needed it."

"Yeah, but... I mean you could have moved me."

Aww... was that a little blush on Sasuke's little cheeks?

"Well." He cleared his throat. "I didn't want to disturb you."

Naruto gave him another grin – genuine this time.

"You're too cute, S'ke." He cooed.

Sasuke shot him a disgruntled glare, putting all his prickles out.

"You know what, go eat your damn ice cream."

Naruto brightened immediately, making a mad dash for the kitchen. When he returned, his spoon was already stuck directly into the gooey green pint. He flopped back onto he couch next to Sasuke, making a slew of suggestive noises as he dove into his tasty treat.

"I think I'm literally having a relationship with this ice cream." He explained to the raised eyebrow.

"No, not literally, idiot." Sasuke corrected. "Figuratively."

"No man." Naruto returned the ice cream to his lips. "Literally."

Sasuke snorted.

Naruto stretched himself across the sofa.

"So do you wanna go out tonight?" He asked. "Try to pick up chicks or something else terribly masculine?"

"You've been single for less than twenty-four hours and you're already looking to get laid?"

"I said _try to_ pick up girls. I didn't plan to actually succeed."

Sasuke looked apprehensive.

"Oh, I forgot, Mr. I-Make-Them-Come-To-Me, your success rate is perfect."

"Nearly." Sasuke clarified.

Naruto stuck the spoon in his mouth with a pensive tilt.

"Does your routine work on girls too? Or only dudes."

Sasuke studied him with dark unreadable eyes.

"You obviously can't take home any woman from any bar." His answer was flat. "But you can almost always find one. The trick is recognising her."

Naruto opened his mouth, but his response was cut off by the chime of Sasuke's mobile phone. He tucked back into his ice cream, letting the minty awesomeness coat his tongue.

Sasuke cocked his head in confusion as he slid his thumb down the screen.

"Who is it?" Naruto nosed.

_Did you find him? Is he alive? Oh my god, say something! I need proof that he's still breathing!_

"Yamanaka, I think." Sasuke scratched his head, as he looked at the text. "How did she get my number?"

"Ino?"

Naruto snatched the phone away.

"She was looking for you earlier." Sasuke explained. "She was worried."

Naruto felt a warm sensation enveloping his whole body. She worried about him. There was a time when not a single person cared about his well-being. Despite the ache in his heart, he just couldn't help feeling stupid-happy.

His eyes darted from the phone, to his ice cream, to Sasuke and back.

"Oh hell no." Sasuke scrambled off the couch.

A wicked grin stretched across Naruto's face.

* * *

><p>On the other side of campus, Ino Yamanaka's phone vibrated in her back pocket. She recapped her nail pen and paused to admire her best friend's perfect french manicure.<p>

With a satisfied smirk, she tugged her phone out of her jeans. Said best friend failed to miss the amused smile that flitted across the blonde's lips.

"Who is it?" Sakura asked, blowing gently on her fingernails.

"Don't worry about it." Ino responded.

Sakura sighed. She didn't know who Ino thought she was kidding.

"It's Naruto, isn't it?" She asked, stretching out to reach the phone.

"You don't want to see it, Sakura." Her best friend warned.

"Oh let me be the judge of that." Sakura snapped.

What's the worst it could be? Even if Naruto were out with a bunch of girls, it's not like he would have replaced her or anything. Her eyes narrowed. It would suck to see him with a bunch of girls.

She clicked on the screen. A message sent from Sasuke's phone.

_I'm doing alright. Thanks for worrying. Take care of my girl for me. -N_

Sakura's heart made a painful thump. Naruto was always too kind.

"That's not so bad..." Sakura's words died on her lips as she saw the attachment.

It should have been funny. She understood why Ino had nearly laughed. Attached, there was a series of selfies in which Naruto was holding Sasuke down and force-feeding him mint chocolate chip ice cream.

In the first photo Sasuke looked panicked. The second he had a spoon in his mouth, and in the third he looked like he was about the ignite the camera. The final photo was the problem. Both boys were covered in the green, sticky goo. Sasuke looked smug, even with ice cream on his nose, and Naruto the sloppier of the two, was grinning ear to ear, his arm looped around his flatmate's shoulders.

Sakura zeroed in on one pale, sticky hand. Far from being the contact-phobic prick Sasuke was known to be, he was gripping Naruto's arm – desperately. Sakura frowned. To most people, the touch would look casual. In fact, she was surprised Ino picked up on the intimacy. It appeared not even Naruto noticed, and it had been his arm.

She felt a sigh slip through her nose. The photo reminded her of those days, years ago, when she would have been draped across them, ice cream smudging her own pale cheeks. In those days, she'd been vying for Sasuke's attention, cherishing those rare moments he indulged her. Sasuke could make her feel like she owned the world.

"I lost them both." She said without a thought.

Sasuke had made her feel amazing, but he also made her feel like a slime mould. A good ninety-nine and a half percent of the time, he was only interested in his friendship with Naruto. She was beginning to wonder if that other half a percent hadn't been about Naruto too.

Sasuke's smug eyes were boring directly into hers.

_Mine._ They said.

Oblivious, Naruto's shit eating grin lit up the photograph.

Or maybe, she wondered. She hadn't lost anything. She never really had either of them.

* * *

><p><strong>AN mock 2:<strong> So Chapter nine is probably about halfway done. I'm definitely in commission for the rest of the holidays. Then, I'll be moving to a new continent. However, as such, I'll be unemployed for a while. Hopefully, it'll be just enough time to finish this damn story.

As always, comments and criticisms are loved and devoured. (Seriously, tell me why I suck! I might not be able to fix the plot holes in this story, but I can always improve!)


	9. Chapter 9

**Standard Disclaimer: **I do not own the characters of Naruto, nor do I make any money from playing with them.

**Summary:** He felt as though his life were over when he left her, with tears in her bright green eyes. But every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end. And sometimes you'll find out that your new beginning has been right beside you all along. Graduate School AU NaruSasuNaru

**Warnings: **Adult themes; Adult language; Drug and alcohol abuse; Promiscuity; Non-detailed sex scenes (m/m and m/f).

**Author's Note:** Merry Chirstmas! In record time (like record tardiness) I present chapter nine!

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter Nine:<strong>

Through the bleary haze of marijuana, thirteen-year old Sasuke watched his girlfriend fuck another guy. As he watched the tanned fingers yank her long, black hair, he was pretty sure he was supposed to feel jealous. To be honest, he was just bored. It's not like he'd been exactly faithful, himself. And speaking of which, Tayuya wasn't around.

It was the teen girl's first visit to Orochimaru's den. The other boys cooked up an enticing mix of cocaine and ecstasy. Sasuke declined with a flick of his wrist, lighting the bitter-scented glass bowl on the table.

With a shrug, he pulled himself from the smelly sofa, homebound. He had a test to study for anyhow.

"Are you sure you're OK with that?" Sakon asked, pushing his bleached hair from his face with a clammy, white hand.

"It's her body." Sasuke drawled, eyeing the scene with dispassion.

"Make sure she gets home," He ordered with a lazy, lilting shrug. "And if her parents get pissed, I wasn't involved."

She was a bit of a bitch, anyway. He didn't mind sharing.

Her name was Tsuchi Kin, and he met her on his first day in Junior High, when he joined a group of rough looking boys to chat with the girls' school down the street.

They had sex in the ladies toilets during lunchtime.

"You could have told me you were a virgin." Sasuke growled, refastening his pants.

The teen shrugged, and muttered something about wanting to get the whole thing over with anyway. Tsuchi was a wannabe rebel and this newest bad boy in Tokyo was her ticket to hell.

Three days later found the two sitting in the principal's office.

"Uchiha-san."

The old man was kind and fair, and a sucker for tradition. Sasuke didn't know the principal from the girls' school. The man stood quiet and stiff in the corner. If anything, he looked twice as stern. Sasuke wielded this knowledge carefully. He bowed deeply to both men, shooting Tsuchi a poisonous glare.

"_Kouchou_-sensei."

Sasuke sat upright in his chair, eyes cast downward in a show of respect.

"Do you know why you're here, Uchiha-san?" The man asked.

Sasuke nodded. His eyes flicked to the old man's, and back down again.

"I think so, Sensei. I've heard some nasty rumours regarding myself and Tsuchi-san."

"Rumours?" His principal sounded sceptical. "What rumours, exactly?"

Sasuke sighed. This was uncomfortable. "I've heard several versions of the story, varying in degree and location."

_All true._

The man nodded, pressing him forward.

"The gist of the rumours seem to be that Tsuchi-san and I engaged in," Sasuke coughed, an honest blush dusting his cheeks. "Inappropriate relations on school property."

"You seem to be denying the allegations."

"Yes, Sensei. They are just rumours."

"And if I had proof." The older man prodded.

"It's impossible to have proof for something that didn't happen, sir."

The old man twisted his lips into a tight frown.

"This is the first time rumours such as these have gone around our schools. Both institutions have an impeccable reputation." The man leaned forward on his chair. "Can you explain that?"

"My family's reputation precedes me at this school, I suppose."

Sasuke pressed his breath outwards.

"Everyone knows my parents were murdered and why." Sasuke voice cracked, he didn't have to fake it. "And most of them know I was standing right there."

His eyes snapped to meet his principal.

"I even heard that I was the one who killed them." His tone was neutral, but the timbre shook with repressed anger, grief.

The old man's dark eyes softened.

"In another version it was my older brother."

Sasuke closed his eyes and filled his lungs, stilling his heart. His display seemed to be helping his case, but if Tsuchi said a damn word about it to anyone…

"I think my classmates have got the idea that I am my father; that character is somehow genetic."

He heard his principal hum.

"It doesn't help that I'm practically _ijin_." Sasuke muttered. _Alien._ _Outsider._

"Did they say that?" He sounded sympathetic.

Sasuke nodded.

"My Japanese does sound pretty funny." He added with a shrug. "I'm working on that."

The man smiled softly and Sasuke pulled his knees together and pressed his back stick straight.

"I have been eating lunch with Tsuchi-san and her friends." The Uchiha teen resumed his story. "Though I'm not sure exactly how the particular rumour in question got started."

He cast a look in her direction. She was leaning back in her chair, looking smug. Disrespectful. If her overconfidence got him expelled, he'd hang her by her hair.

"I'm not unfamiliar with the rumour mill. Although, with all respect Sensei, the switch from homo to stud isn't _such_ an unpleasant change." Sasuke let his tone go flat, carefully eyeing the upward twitch of his principal's lips.

That admission was a bit of a gamble, but it seemed to pay off.

"However, for a young woman, such a story _should be_ devastating."

He gave the other teen a look of contempt, making a show of blaming her for the rumours. It didn't appear that she understood the implication, but both older men nodded in understanding. Tsuchi's repute as a wannabe was playing in Sasuke's favour.

"I understand how important the honour of your school is, _Kouchou_-sensei. If you prefer, I can eat with a different group of students." Sasuke sighed, pinching his nose. "Or alone. It isn't important to me."

"Do as you please, Uchiha-san." The man responded.

"Sasuke-kun!" The girl called after him as he slunk down the hallway.

Still in earshot of the principal, Sasuke replied. "Perhaps you shouldn't regard me so informally, Tsuchi-san."

He shrugged her off and continued through the school's narrow gate.

He let the girl follow him silently until he reached a wooded park. He motioned her to follow him with distaste.

"I'm sorry, Uchiha." She mumbled.

He shoved her against a tree, pressing his forearm against her throat. Not hard enough to choke her, but enough to be uncomfortable.

"What the hell were you thinking?!" He snapped, vise cold as steel.

Her eyes grew teary.

"I'm sorry!" She repeated.

"You can still… if you want to…" She trailed off.

"And what use do I have for a woman who can't keep her goddamn mouth shut?" He bit.

"There are other things I can do with my mouth." She offered. "And I won't tell. You can trust me."

"Bullshit."

"Come on." She urged.

"You didn't even get punished. I'm the one who got suspended, however you did that." She muttered.

A little manipulation with a dash of sexism working in his favour, is all.

She shifted against him.

"What about right here?" She pulled at his tie, ignoring the arm that still pressed into her windpipe. "It's not school property?"

He spun her around by the roots of her hair, pressing her against the tree. He was angry and _selfish_ and rough, and didn't give one solitary fuck. He wondered what Naruto would think of him, dirty and vulgar in the half-frozen leaves. Would he be jealous? Horrified? He was such a child.

Everyone knew the rumours were true – everyone but the principal. All of his classmates discovered that Sasuke could use his silver tongue to get away with murder – _just_ _like his father had_. And the yakuza tattoo that appeared on his shoulder some weeks later, visible for about two seconds as he changed into his gym uniform, cemented his position as the most badass teen to ever grace the corridors of Azabu Junior High. It wasn't so bad being at the top of the food chain, for once.

He'd tell Naruto that he could suck his dick, for all he cared. But he'd have to get in line.

* * *

><p>Naruto stared blankly into his closet.<p>

"I haven't been to a club in years." He whined. "What the hell am I supposed to wear?"

His unhelpful flatmate lounged silently on his bed.

Sasuke was sure to be a shitty wingman. He could go in a burlap sack, and he'd still steal all the girls. Naruto would have to dress to the nines if he hoped to attract any attention. He huffed. Not that he actually planned being successful anyway. It was just an excuse to get out of the apartment.

With a sigh he pulled out a pair of jeans.

"Don't wear those." Sasuke advised.

"I always wear these." Naruto defended.

"They're too baggy, moron. They look sloppy."

Naruto shot him a dirty look, but returned the jeans to their pile on the floor.

Tighter jeans. He had a pair somewhere under all that mess. Dark denim.

He fished them out and pulled them on. Yes, he was in his underwear in front of his flatmate. Was that weird? Probably.

"If you even think about wearing a short-sleeved button up, don't." Sasuke warned as Naruto pawed through his drawers.

"Why not? It's going to be hot."

"Because you'll look stupid. Do you even know how to dress yourself, moron?"

"Of course I know how to dress myself!" Naruto huffed. "Kind of."

Sasuke rolled his eyes dramatically.

"What do you want to say about yourself?"

"What do you mean?"

"The way you dress advertises who you are. Every detail says something about you."

Naruto blew air out of his lips.

"You're saying that my choice of belt could make or break my evening?"

"Belt, shoes, socks, everything." Sasuke shrugged.

"Who notices that kind of crap anyway?"

"Women."

"They do not!" Naruto defended.

"Sure they do. Even if it's not on purpose. You have to advertise that you're even in the game. If you go out looking sloppy, no one will take you seriously."

"What does my normal style say about me?" Naruto implored.

"It says you're mentally lazy and you have bad taste." His roommate responded dryly.

"Oh shut up, asshole!"

"You asked."

"So what do I wear!?" Naruto whined again.

"I don't know, idiot. It depends on the kind of girl you're looking for. Preppy? Sporty? Alternative? Just dress the part to match."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

Sasuke stood and rummaged though Naruto's closet. He pulled out two pairs of shoes.

"It means idiot, that these shoes make you look more mature, and these make you look more playful."

"I have honestly never heard you sound so gay." Naruto laughed out loud. "I'm looking for a _woman_, Uchiha. Are you sure you know what you're talking about?"

Sasuke narrowed his eyes. "Think about the number of girls you've slept with, idiot."

Naruto cocked his head, not sure where exactly Sasuke was going with this.

"Now multiply that by about thirty. I think I know a thing or two about women."

Naruto felt his jaw drop. Sasuke had hinted about his promiscuity, but he'd honestly never thought about the maths.

"Jesus, Uchiha. Did you just go gay because you finished all the women?"

He shrugged. "It's possible. And I never said I was gay."

He watched as Sasuke rifled through one of his drawers.

"You're not?" It was a sincere question.

"It doesn't have to be all or nothing, idiot."

Naruto hummed thoughtfully. After Sasuke's accidental outing, he'd done a little reading on the subject, not that he'd ever admit that to the Uchiha.

_I just do what feels right when it feels right_. Sasuke told him.

Those feminists said more or less the same thing about sexuality.

Naruto flopped on his bed.

"How long have you been seeing men?" He asked honestly.

Sasuke shrugged. "About a year, I guess."

Naruto gave him a thoughtful hum. "That's not very long."

Sasuke remained silent.

"How did you know?"

Sasuke looked a little uncomfortable.

"I mean did you always like guys, or was it kind of a surprise?"

The Uchiha's loud sigh sounded in the otherwise silent room. He looked like he was mulling over something, tasting the words in his mouth.

"In retrospect, I always did." He mumbled. "I should have known but I didn't. I didn't have any problems being with girls, but it became more apparent over the years."

Naruto leaned forward on his elbows, urging him to continue.

"I hooked up with a guy one night. I was pretty high at the time. I guess at the time I didn't see how topping a random guy was any different than doing anal with a random girl. It's not like I cared about the person."

"But you liked it." Naruto suggested. "More than you thought."

Sasuke shrugged. "Admitting I liked men was pretty easy after that."

"You changed." Naruto noted. "I noticed."

Sasuke offered him a curious look.

"For some time now, you've just seemed more comfortable in your own skin. I get it now. It's a good thing."

Sasuke's eyes flicked to Naruto and held him there for a moment.

"Everything finally made sense." The Uchiha said simply.

Naruto knew something was passing over his head. He blinked and the moment passed. Sasuke was digging through his drawers again.

"Out of curiosity, do you see yourself settling down with a man or a woman?"

Sasuke stilled. He looked distant for a moment.

"It's not like it matters." He answered at last.

Naruto was reminded of their conversation the previous week. That mystery person. He hadn't noticed at the time, but in retrospect he wondered if Sasuke had actually used any gendered pronouns.

"You're in love with a straight man." Naruto guessed, chewing on his lip.

Sasuke rolled his eyes. "I'm not in love with anyone."

Naruto wasn't fooled. He frowned. It didn't take a rocket scientist to recognise the stirrings of jealousy in his gut. It was weird and uncomfortable, and Naruto thought maybe finally understood Sasuke's annoyance with his girlfriends. He was so used to being his best friend's most important person. As horrible as it was, he didn't want Sasuke to leave him.

"_He can't stand to see you happy_." Sakura had said.

Naruto almost snorted. Apparently this co-dependency thing was a two-way street.

"Does he know?" Naruto asked, voice thin.

Sasuke didn't respond.

"I understand why you wouldn't want to say anything, but..."

"But nothing, idiot. He's straight. The sooner I accept that, the sooner I can move on."

Sasuke's tone was bitter. He didn't sound very ready to move on, and the thought didn't sit very well in Naruto's stomach.

"It doesn't have to be all or nothing, you know." Naruto tossed back at him. "Maybe Mr. Mystery-Man is queer."

Sasuke snorted. "That was quite the alliteration there idiot."

Naruto grinned.

"And I'm surprised you know a word like queer."

"I'm an academic, asshole, I must know these things." Naruto playfully puffed out his chest, failing to note the sudden diversion in conversation.

"You mean you checked out _The History of Sexuality_ from the library last week."

"Foucault never used the word queer."

Sasuke snorted. "I knew it."

"Whatever asshole. You proposed a query. I did a little research. Is it such a terrible thing to want to understand you better?"

"Interesting choice of words – query."

"I was rather proud of that one myself."

Sasuke snorted, finally procuring an acceptable shirt. He hit Naruto in the face with it.

"You mean after all that fuss about fashion, you want me to wear a plain black t-shirt?"

"A tight, plain black t-shirt." Sasuke corrected. "You have a nice body, might as well play to your strengths."

"Are you saying I'm hot, Uchiha?"

"I'm saying that if a woman becomes infatuated with your pecs, she might not notice your idiotic personality."

Naruto flipped him his middle finger and pulled on the shirt.

"Dress it up a little with your nice watch and a plain leather belt. As for the shoes, I'd go for your new kicks. The dress shoes might be a little much for a night like tonight."

Naruto paused in front of the mirror, ensemble complete. He ran a hand through his dandelion hair.

"Not bad." He mused aloud.

Sasuke may have had a point about his style choices.

"It's not that hard to look nice, idiot. You just have to think a little."

Naruto gave his best friend a winning chuckle.

"Too bad it's all for naught. You and I both know I'm not going to get laid tonight."

* * *

><p>Naruto awoke to a pleasant smell. Jasmine, his mind provided. It was odd, he thought. Sakura used coconut shampoo. His eyes fluttered open, met by a sea of turquoise.<p>

What the fuck?

He jerked upright in bed.

He blinked, taking in the strange bedroom around him. A pretty girl with a blonde pixie cut was curled up next to him.

Oh shit! Ani? Anna? Anja? Annalise?

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck!

His mind drifted to the previous night. Right. Sasuke ditched him after about thirty seconds, the cocksucker! (Literally!)

They'd had an argument over a pack of cigarettes.

"I don't want to date a smoker." Naruto protested the procured tobacco, left as an open invitation on their table.

"You're looking for a one night stand, idiot, not a wife."

"I still don't see how this is going to work."

"They have to come to you. If you go to them, you look creepy. Now keep your posture open and don't do anything weird."

Naruto looked out over the small sea of bodies on the dance floor. It was a nice little place. It wasn't too crowded for a Friday night, and that the blond man appreciated.

"You know I was just kidding when I said I wanted to pick up chicks, right Sasuke?"

Nothing.

"Sasuke?" He repeated.

He whipped his head around. He could just the silhouette of a stupid duck-butt haircut as it disappeared towards the men's room.

"Asshole." He muttered, leaning back on his stool.

"Can I bum a fag?"

Naruto startled. There she was, a pretty girl with green eyes – just a shade lighter than Sakura's – not that he should be thinking about her right now.

"Sure, why not?" He gave the pretty girl a friendly smile. "They're actually not mine."

She chuckled. She had a nice laugh.

"I don't think you're supposed to tell me that."

"It's not like I nicked them or anything. They are my friend's."

"Do you have a light?"

He fished out the book of matches that Sasuke had stuffed in his pocket.

"It's sexier if you light it for me."

"Right." Naruto cupped his hand around her cigarette. "I'm rubbish at this."

"I don't think you're supposed to tell me that either."

Naruto shrugged. "May as well be honest."

"Your friend is the gay one?" She implored, taking a drag on the cigarette.

"Damn." Naruto swore. "Does everyone on the planet have a better gaydar than me? I've known him since we were kids and I had no idea he swung that way."

She laughed again. "No, I just saw him getting cruised on the way to the bathroom."

"Christ. All he has to do to pick someone up is go take a piss." Naruto rolled his eyes. "He _is_ good."

"Do I detect a hint of jealousy?" She teased.

"Maybe." He shot back.

"It must be nice to be that free." She said a bit wistfully.

He gave her a teasing smile. "You're the one chatting up strange men at a bar."

She laughed.

"You think you're getting chatted up?"

"You tell me." Naruto shrugged. "You could just be looking for a free cigarette, I guess."

"I could be, though I'm enjoying being intentionally vague for the moment."

She took another drag of her cigarette.

"I'm Anna."

"Naruto."

"Now you're no longer a stranger."

The young woman sent him a teasing smirk that reminded him a little too much of Sasuke – not that he should be thinking about him at the moment either.

"What are your intentions for this evening?" She asked bluntly.

"It's another one of those things I'm not supposed to tell you, but I'm just off a relationship. Tonight I'm looking for a good time." Naruto replied with equal frankness.

"Who is telling you what you should and shouldn't say?" Anna implored.

"Well _you_ just a second ago, and the friend who apparently ditched me for a go in the men's room."

She laughed again. The timbre made him smile.

"I do appreciate your honesty."

Naruto shrugged again, leaning back on the barstool. "It's better that way. It doesn't seem very sporty otherwise."

"I don't suppose anyone wants to find the love of their life at a bar." Her eyes trailed across his torso. "Least of all me."

"You're recently single, too." Naruto guessed.

She lifted her eyebrows.

"Your haircut looks fresh. It's the sign of a big life change." Naruto noted.

"Very perceptive."

"I don't know though." He snagged his hand through his blond spikes out of habit. "I reckon I'm supposed to be careful with vulnerable women."

"I prefer the term empowered." She paused stabbing out the end of the cigarette in the crystal ashtray. "One more question."

Naruto hummed, teasing apart the coaster on the table.

"Are you presuming I'm going to go home with you tonight?"

Naruto shook his head. "Quite the contrary."

"Good." She commented, "I should tell you I'm not planning on going home with anyone tonight."

"In that case, now that we're clear, I'd like to ask you to dance." The man offered.

"Did you hear what I just said?"

"I said I want to have a good time tonight." Naruto clarified. "One can do that without having sex, right?"

Anna raised her eyebrows.

"I'm not a presumptuous person. I never expected anything else. Honestly. I'm not nearly that smooth." He shrugged.

"Did your coach tell you to say that too?"

"No, I cocked up his advice the moment I forgot to light your cigarette." Naruto admitted.

She snorted and took his hand.

"I'll take you up on that dance."

He never saw Sasuke again, the asshole. On a more positive note, Anna changed her mind about her intentions, and quite forcibly dragged him home.

She was fun – a little wild and a lot intellectual, and Naruto thought he could get used to sleeping with feminists.

It was then that he noticed he was staring directly into a pair of light green eyes.

"Good morning?" Naruto shot her an awkward smile.

She snorted, and shoved her head under her pillow.

"If you want to shower, help yourself." Her muffled voice emerged.

"No," Naruto cleared his throat. "It's OK."

"This is awkward." She mumbled.

"I… had a good time?" Naruto offered.

She pulled her head back out from beneath the pillow. "Me too."

Naruto stretched, looking around for his jeans.

"I think it's standard protocol to leave your number, even if you don't want me to call."

"I was going to, anyway!" He defended.

She hummed doubtfully.

"I wasn't kidding when I said I had a good time. Under other circumstances, I'd probably ask you to marry me."

She snorted again, and he found it rather endearing.

"Why are you smiling like that?" She implored.

"You keep snorting. It reminds me of Sasuke." He paused. "My asshole friend who ditched me last night."

"You're comparing the woman you just slept with to your gay best friend?" She arched one blonde brow, also in a very Sasuke-esque fashion.

In fact, her hair was kind of similar, albeit a totally different shade.

Naruto grinned. "Well, apparently I have a type."

"That doesn't disturb you?" She prodded.

A bit.

"Less than it used to." He admitted. "We have a weird relationship."

"What does a girl have to do to play into your repressed, homosexual fantasies?"

"Hmm." Naruto pondered, pausing with his shirt still in his hand. "Insult me, and I'm all yours." He joked.

She scoffed. "You really are an idiot."

Her surprised shriek when he pounced on her really wasn't all that Sasuke-like, but he supposed he could let it go for the time being.

* * *

><p>Sasuke shivered as he toed off his sopping wet converse at the doorway. The shoes his flatmate had worn the previous night sat in the corner, basking in their own icy puddle. Naruto hadn't been home long.<p>

The same sick sensation he'd felt when he saw Naruto dancing with that girl last night returned in full force. He balled up his wet socks and threw them across the room in frustration. They landed with a satisfying _splunk_ on the carpet.

He'd practically delivered Naruto to her with a bow on his head. What did he expect? Naruto was a straight man – an adorable, clueless, _straight_ man. He knew their bond was important to Naruto, he'd be lying if he tried to discount it. The fact remained that however deep their friendship ran, there were parts of himself Naruto simply couldn't offer, no matter how cuddly he got sometimes.

He glared at his wrinkled, white toes as he trudged into the apartment. A sharp pain to the side of his head startled him from his sulking. He snapped his head to the side. A half-naked Naruto sat behind the kitchen table, his hand still poised midair, from where he'd thrown his _goddamn spoon_ at him.

"What the hell was that for?!" Sasuke growled.

"That," Naruto stood stalking over to him to snatch his spoon from the floor. "Was for ditching me last night, you asshole!"

Sasuke couldn't help the way his eyes raked over his flatmate's form, clad only in a pair of loose fitting sweats. Gods, his skin was even still damp from his shower.

"You had a good time, didn't you?" Sasuke demanded, the words tasting sour in his mouth.

"Not the point!"

Naruto was in his face, lightly tapping his spoon against his nose.

"I wanted to kick it with _you_, you jerk." Naruto pressed closer. "And you're there for all of ten seconds before you _abandon_ me for some dude!"

Sasuke could feel the heat of the other man's skin through his shirt. He pressed his eyes closed and took a shaky breath. He'd broken a lot of hearts as a teenager, and karma was a cruel, raging bitch.

"I…" Naruto stammered. "Are you OK? I didn't think this would actually hit you."

Sasuke felt Naruto's fingers in his hair. He peeked up at him, his heart tightening at the worried expression the man wore.

"I'm fine, idiot. Quit messing with it." He ordered, slapping his hand away. "And put some damn clothes on!"

"Like what you see?" Naruto teased.

He made a show of flexing his muscles.

Yes.

"Whatever." Sasuke snapped back. "If you die of pneumonia, I'm not coming to your funeral."

Sasuke pushed away from his flatmate's snickers, and into the bathroom.

"You're making it up to me tonight!" Naruto called through the door. "And you'd better not disappear halfway through!"

Sasuke ignored the man and slipped out of his damp clothes. The room remained a little steamy from Naruto's shower, and Sasuke sighed with content as he stepped under the warm spray. He let out a satisfied moan. He'd been looking forward to this moment all morning. He was _freezing_, sore, and he smelt like sex. It wasn't often he had sex two days in a row, let alone three, and an ache thrummed between his legs as the sudden spike in activity.

He'd gone home with a typical twink: a cute, brunette, and effeminate young man, who was, most importantly, nothing like Naruto. It had been nice. He hadn't topped since he'd started sleeping with Juugo, and to be honest, he'd appreciated the change.

Unfortunately, he found himself wishing the body beneath him were thicker, darker, and for the course stubble that appeared on Naruto's chin every evening. It had been even worse than the night before, and it bugged the hell out of him. He found himself facing the same problem he'd encountered more than ten years ago: sex wasn't much fun unless he was tripping some serious balls. Only now, he knew _why_ he couldn't keep his best friend out of his head.

He let his head fall against the shower wall. Twice.

"Fuck me." He muttered.

* * *

><p>Naruto was aware that he was a bit slow, but he was only ninety-eight percent oblivious. He slipped into a cozy long-sleeved shirt at his roommate's bidding, eyeing the closed bathroom door with apprehension spelt across his face. He flopped on his bed, tangling his fingers the soft, white fur of his cat's belly.<p>

Kyuubi groaned in his sleep and let escape one long purr.

Sasuke was attracted to him. Naruto had missed neither the way the other man's dark eyes had slithered across his body, nor the flaring of his nostrils as he approached. So, he did what he always did when he felt uncomfortable: he cracked a joke. He made Sasuke scoff and push him away. At least he could breathe a little easier.

Naruto Uzumaki was not known for his modesty. He worked hard for those washboard abs, and he wasn't the least bit ashamed to whip them out whenever possible. Coupled with the fact that Sasuke liked the male physique, it shouldn't be surprising. Of _course_ he found Naruto attractive, who didn't?

Nonetheless, Naruto found himself reverberating from the shock. Sasuke was like a superstar, about a zillion times more popular than he'd ever be. Naruto had always felt like he was about three steps behind Sasuke, just out of reach. He was just so fucking _cool_, so sexy– not that he'd ever admit it to that arrogant jerk.

The man supposed that if his flatmate wanted to be promiscuous, he couldn't be too picky, but that thought sat spoilt and sour in Naruto's gut. He didn't want to be the same as those faceless bodies with whom Sasuke shared his nights. He didn't want Sasuke's lust.

So what _did_ he want?

It didn't help Anna's playful badgering that morning had thrown him a little off balance. He liked her, that was certain, but it begged a question. What was it about her that he found so enticing?

Sure, she had a nice body, sleek and athletic. She was cut in the same way Sakura had been when they first got together. She told him she took Krav Maga, which was a little bit terrifying and a lot bit hot. However, that wasn't what he found so captivating. What Naruto really found attractive was her cocky attitude. He was hypnotized by that sharp tongue of hers, by their easy banter, and by the way her insults slipped effortlessly through her teeth.

He thought he'd been kidding, but he actually _got off_ on insults?

Jesus, what was wrong with him?!

Another part of that pesky two percent of awareness that Naruto had going for him flared. He'd found fascinating all the qualities she shared with his best friend – his very _male_ best friend.

Naruto didn't need to travel into queer sexuality to admit that Sasuke was sexy. His eyeballs were intact and functioning, after all. On the other hand, knowing that Sasuke was a steamy specimen of man, and realising you've chosen a sexual partner on the basis of stunning similarities between that woman and said steamy specimen of man were two entirely different animals.

Yes, Sasuke was physically attractive. But sitting open-mouthed and stunned on his bed, Naruto realised that he was attracted _to_ Sasuke, and apparently to his sunny disposition.

Fuck.

Even if it were all well and good to have the hots for his best friend (it wasn't) there was just one problem. One _very_ important problem.

Sasuke was… well… he had… you know… he had a penis.

_Obviously, idiot._

Naruto frowned. Sasuke even insulted him in his own head.

He'd cultivated quite the reputation for being accomplished in bed, but what the hell was he supposed to do if he found a penis staring him in the face. His girlfriends had never seemed to share this anxiety. He knew exactly what they did with it.

He snuck a peek down the front of his sweats. His own manhood lay deflated, all squished up against his leg. It looked something like an anteater that had got hit by a truck.

He scrunched his face.

Yeah. Not appetising.

With a huff, he let his elastic band snap against his waist.

Across the hall, the shower switched off. Naruto's eyes widened. Sasuke was in there _naked_.

One of Naruto's many gifts was his incredibly vivid imagination.

He choked, staring at the blank bathroom door. Now was _not _the time to be thinking about Sasuke's penis.

He flopped on his stomach, burying his head under his pillow.

He needed a distraction.

Unfortunately, his mind had already gone _there_ the only thing his brain could produce at the moment were detailed images of various men in his life, buck ass naked. When he got to his junior high gym teacher, he let out a wail.

"Are you OK?"

Naruto dared to peek from beneath his pillow. His roommate stood in his doorway, wearing only his midnight blue bathrobe. The image of a scantily clad Sasuke did nothing to dislodge the weird thoughts spinning through his head.

He emitted a high-pitched "eep!" and dove back under his pillow.

"What's wrong?" Sasuke asked with a worry-tinged tone.

Naruto blinked, briefly reemerging from his pillow. Sasuke sat on the edge of his bed.

"Nothing's wrong." He assured the other man, though a thread of panic leaked into his voice.

Sasuke looked sceptical. "Did you really like that girl, or something?"

"No." Naruto stuffed his head back in his safe, little space. "I mean yes, but no."

"What is it then?" Sasuke groused. "I know it's not _nothing_."

"It's embarrassing!" Naruto moaned.

"What on earth could embarrass you?" Sasuke asked dryly.

Naruto huffed, peeling back one corner of his pillow.

"Remember our junior high gym teacher?" He asked.

"Mr. Maito?" Sasuke asked, confused.

"He had that green track suit that didn't leave much to the imagination." Naruto continued.

Sasuke was shooting him a bewildered look.

"Well, I don't know." Naruto could feel his face turning scarlet. "Suddenly, I just… I imagined him naked."

His flatmate looked positively horrified.

"It gets worse!" Naruto wailed.

"How?" The other man demanded.

"I started wondering if he also gave his 'nads a bowl cut!"

Sasuke made a strangled sort of gag.

"And then I got this close up mental picture!"

Naruto slammed the pillow back over his face.

"And they were smiling at me!"

"What is wrong with you?" Sasuke managed to choke, his voice trembling with laughter.

"I don't know! It's horrible!" He sobbed. "Gods! Make it stop!"

Naruto heard Sasuke's skull thump against the headboard, and he peeped out again. The man had his head thrown back, his whole body trembling in the attempt to stifle his laughter.

He rested his chin in the crook of his elbow, letting his horror soften into a light smile. That was of course, until suave Uchiha Sasuke fucking _snorted_, and the air filled with his own wave of giggles.

This moment was perfect: sharing a gut-coiling laugh with his favourite flatmate. Sasuke's eyes were crinkled, and Naruto could see the beginning of tears collecting in their corners.

Naruto felt a warm pressure beneath his ribcage and his heart tittered in his chest.

The laughter froze on his lips. Feeling inexplicably shy, he pressed his chin into his mattress, until only a pair of curious, bright eyes were visible above his arm. His eyes traced Sasuke's flawless face, noticing details he'd never memorised: the subtle dip beneath his nose, the fact that his lower lip was slightly fuller than the other.

His breath grew shallow.

He felt as though someone were cupping a warm glove around his heart.

Naruto realised he wanted to kiss the other man. It wasn't the first time his lips had felt this little tingle, but this time it was different. The desire wasn't spawned by Sasuke's seductive gaze, nor from the shock of seeing him dolled up and dressed to kill. No, this was just Sasuke, in his tattered, worn out bathrobe, with sopping wet hair, snorting with laughter.

This Sasuke wasn't sexy; he was _beautiful_.

Sasuke's laughter stilled, a smirk still pulling at his pale lips. Those deep, midnight eyes met his, and Naruto could feel a blush settling on his hidden cheeks.

The man didn't have to voice his confusion for Naruto to understand.

He just shook his head and let his eyes fall shut. He pressed the bridge of his nose into his best friend's knee. His lungs filled with the damp scent of shower gel and fabric softener. A contented smile curled his lips, and for a moment, he just let his mind go comfortably blank.

He felt hesitant fingers scraping against his scalp, and his heart skittered again.

Naruto recoginised the sensation: these were butterflies, something he hadn't felt in earnest since before he and Sakura started going steady.

This wasn't physical attraction.

Naruto took another shaking breath.

This pull came from somewhere inside his skin, birthed in the same place that their friendship called home. It twisted, and curled, and warmed him from the inside.

"I'm so fucked." He whispered with a chuckle, feeling a confused hand still in his hair.

Naruto just let escape a dramatic sigh and beamed up at his flatmate.

"You wanna make breakfast?" He grinned.

"You just ate." Sasuke scolded.

"But all I had were Coco Puffs!" He pouted. "And you're home now!"

Naruto bit Sasuke's knee for good measure.

"Fine." Sasuke groaned. "Get started on some orange juice."

"_Yatta_!" Naruto cheered, bouncing out of bed.

He threw a warm smile over his shoulder, which Sasuke returned with a smirk of his own.

God_damn_ those butterflies!

As Sasuke disappeared into his bedroom, Naruto blew a befuddled raspberry at Sasuke's closed bedroom door. He caught the feels in a bad way.

"I am very _very_ fucked."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: <strong>OOOOO! Can we get a _finally_?

Hopefully, it's not too slow. I just can't imagine a straight man just up an hopping into bed with another dude, even when he knows he's in love. I really don't think it's something that can happen over night. You know, there's a _penis_ problem. I'd been open about my sexuality a LONG time before I got the courage to act on it.

In other news, sex clubs DO exist. O_o Accidentally stumbled into one on holiday last week. (Through a dark alley, down concrete steps, under a garage, and through a twisting corridor... I thought I was going to get robbed) All dungeon themed with paintings of naked people lining the walls. Not exactly my partner's and my scene, so we didn't hang around, but I was like "huh." Much smaller than the one I imagined, but I suppose that makes sense.

ANYWAY!

**In the next episode:** It's besties night at a dance club, but Naruto and Sasuke aren't the only famous twosome that appear. Naruto remembers his friends are awesome, and maybe even Itachi will appear in the flesh.


	10. Chapter 10

**Author's note: **Sooo, almost 10,000 words. Don't kill me?

Honestly, I've been sitting on this for a while, I just couldn't get through the second to last part. I may work through it again later, but for now I'll move on.

Enjoy! :)

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter Ten<strong>

"You're going to have to share." Uchiha Itachi spoke from behind his folded newspaper. "Or you'll lose him."

Uchiha Sasuke thought the thirteen-hour plane ride back from Tokyo, sandwiched between his brother and once-upon-a-time best friend would be awkward. The whole time they were in Japan had been awkward. Itachi wouldn't leave his side, while Naruto was… avoiding him.

Naruto was always _there_, with his feet kicked up next to Sasuke's hospital bed and his nose shoved into a manga. He broke the silence only to ask about one unfamiliar kanji or another. It took Sasuke two days after he had awoken from his overdose to realise he'd never taught Naruto to read.

He would chat sometimes, too – about idle things. The sky tower wasn't so impressive, after all. The world's longest escalator was – long. _Really long_. He'd crossed the intersection at the Shibuya station four times in a row, just for the hell of it. Sasuke wished he were well enough to join Naruto in his little adventures, stupid as they sounded. He'd like to see Tokyo through Naruto's innocent eyes. For him, the cold steel and concrete were bathed in heroin and blood, the streets paved with the corpses of everyone he'd known in this city.

Despite the chatter, however, Naruto didn't really talk about anything.

"Ichiraku." Sasuke told his brother when Naruto had gone to visit the Meiji shrine.

Jiraiya and Sasuke never had much in common, but the old man wouldn't shut up about this ramen stand he'd once found on his travels through Japan.

"I found it." He explained. "I think Naruto might want to try."

He didn't tell Itachi that he'd spent months searching for it, not even sure it still existed, nor that he ate at that stupid stand at least once a week, even though he hated ramen. He didn't mention that in his darkest days, his last link to his own humanity, to Naruto, was a place the boy had never been. That for the hours he spent silently slurping those noodles, he spent with an imaginary spectre of his friend by his side.

Itachi gave him a soft smile. "You don't know what this will mean to him."

Naruto's reaction was unnerving. His smile faltered as his eyes trailed across the lettering on the bag, and he traced his heart in the same way he did whenever he talked about his parents. Finally, he turned his wide eyes to Sasuke, looking at him for the first time since their reunion. Those weren't the same eyes he remembered.

"Thank you, Sasuke."

"When did Jiraiya die?" Sasuke asked his brother after the boy had returned to the hotel room for the evening.

Itachi stilled. "Very perceptive, little brother."

Sasuke glared at him from beneath his eyebrows.

In these years he'd spent in darkness, he thought about Naruto often. The boy was such a child when he left. Innocent. Stupid. Sure, he mooned over Sakura, but he was honestly much more interested in sports than breasts. At the very least, Sasuke remembered his friend reasoning, he'd outgrow Lionel Messi one day (probably).

But Sasuke was _different_. While Naruto played ball with the little kids, Sasuke hid behind the bleachers getting high with his classmates. Naruto was none the wiser. Indeed, the shadows had taken over Sasuke long before he stepped foot on the airplane to Japan. Naruto was too naive to notice.

"Where did he go?" Sasuke asked. "Who took care of him?"

"Wasn't that the million dollar question." Itachi mused with a bitter, laboured sigh. "It's unfortunate you weren't there to ask that when he needed it."

Sasuke winced.

They were the eyes of a child that followed Sasuke around Tokyo. He imagined them narrowing in disgust as he watched Sasuke fall deeper into the yakuza's abyss. But as for the boy he'd left behind, he imagined him shooting hoops with that twerp down the hall. He imagined him playing pranks on his teachers and shirking chores at home. He imagined those sloppy mealtimes between an old bachelor and his misfit kid.

He never imagined Naruto would be alone.

"I'm sorry, little brother. You've suffered enough. That wasn't fair."

Itachi folded his newspaper, and Sasuke discovered for the first time how much his departure had hurt his older brother as well.

"You can't expect Naruto-kun to be the same little boy you left." Itachi explained. "Of course he's changed. So have you."

A young nurse entered the room to inform the brothers that visiting hours were finished.

"He's popular. He does well in school and in sports."

Sasuke's scoffed, but the image of the nurses giggling and cooing over his blond, Japanese-speaking foreigner got lodged in his throat. It made his stomach churn.

"You're going to have to share." Itachi continued, folding his newspaper. "Or you'll lose him."

His older brother paused in the doorway.

"And if you want to know things about his life, you're going to have to earn back his trust yourself."

Naruto changed. He grew up. Sasuke knew the concept shouldn't be so difficult to digest. Nevertheless at each instance, he found the changes in his young friend shocking. Not the least of which, was the first horror, the day he was discharged from the hospital, on which he discovered that Naruto had outgrown him by upwards of six centimetres.

So, he sat on the airplane, feeling terribly out of place and trying to ignore his idiot friend flirting shamelessly with the flight attendant. The worst part was, it was working. He prodded her about her life, about flying across the world every day. The two flipped back and forth flawlessly between English and Japanese in the same way he and Sasuke had done as children.

"Aren't you a little young to call me '_chan,_' Naruto-kun."

"Don't be silly, Kumi-chan, you can't be a day over twenty."

_Bullshit._

She giggled and patted his arm. Sasuke didn't like the way she played with her hair. She was genuinely charmed by a boy ten years her junior.

_Pedo_.

"Do you think we'll go to the same high school?" Naruto pondered aloud during takeoff.

"Aren't you afraid I'll steal all the girls?" Sasuke snapped, feeling unjustifiably bitter about that damn flight attendant.

Naruto laughed.

"Just Sakura." He mused, fiddling with his seat belt.

Sasuke rolled his eyes.

"I'm at St. Joe." Naruto explained.

Sasuke's eyes snapped open. St. Joseph was probably the most prestigious high school in the state. They had gone to a public elementary and junior high, granted the best in the district. Still, the Catholic schools were a whole different ballpark when it came to admissions.

"I was lucky. The entrance exams were a cinch, but some of my grades weren't all that great. They liked my essay, I guess."

Naruto was rambling in that same aimless way he had since he'd arrived in Japan.

"I wrote about Jiraiya. The admissions board wasn't all that Catholic, luckily. And they always like a good charity case." Naruto chuckled nervously. "Plus Sakura would have kicked my ass if I didn't get in."

Sasuke bit his tongue.

"She's at St. Ursula, obviously."

Sasuke knew the schools by reputation. The two shared facilities and professors, though the majority of the classes remained segregated.

"I'm sure you could get in if you wanted to." Naruto whined. "You probably wouldn't even have to study."

_ He had to study a lot harder than he'd ever admit._

As Sasuke was preparing for the inevitable discomfort of thirteen hours of mindless dribble, moments after _Kumi-chan_ passed with their first round of drinks, Naruto passed out, face-first on his tray table. He must have been exhausted to sleep all squished up like that.

Naruto's hands drew the attention of Sasuke's critical eyes. They were _big, _out of proportion with the rest of his body. They were the hands of a man, stuck onto the scrawny body of a teenager. They made Sasuke uncomfortable.

The most pressing discomfort Sasuke found whilst trying to squeeze himself back into his best friend's life, was that of Naruto's girlfriend. An unfamiliar redheaded girl accosted them at the airport. She smacked Naruto across the face so hard his head reeled. Then, she jumped in his arms and appeared to be trying to reach his stomach with her tongue.

"Gross." A female voice put words to his thoughts.

He shared a disgusted look with Sakura Haruno, of all people, part of Naruto's little welcoming party.

"Sasuke, this is Sasame." Naruto beamed. "She's my girlfriend."

"Obviously." Sakura muttered, voice trimmed with what Sasuke refused to believe was jealousy.

The moron informed him no less than twenty times a day that he was over the moon that Sasuke was back. Coupled with the fact that his grin was so bright Sasuke had to squint every time he walked into the room left him no reason to doubt his friend's conviction.

Yet, they stood on uncertain ground. There remained an awkward distance that neither seemed to know how to bridge. Sitting alone in his room more afternoons than not, Sasuke found himself growing more angry and bitter.

What happened to all those promises that they'd be inseparable forever? That their bond was so special? Naruto always claimed to be a man of his word. Where the hell was he now?

Part of the problem was the flock of loyal followers that seemed to gather wherever Naruto went. Itachi wasn't kidding when he said the idiot had become popular. Turned out he was a decent basketball player and an even better swimmer to boot. Whispers of a possible state championship had his classmates glomming onto Naruto between classes and dragging him off at lunch. Not to mention the hours of practice that sucked the blond teen away from his side.

The worst of the lot was Sakura Haruno. Sasuke didn't know what the hell had sparked that unlikely friendship, but these days they were practically joined at the hip. He'd overheard some girls gossiping at school about their relationship. Sakura laughed and responded, "It's not like that! He's my best friend!" And that hurt the worst of all.

And the majority of the problem was that clingy, slobbery girlfriend of his.

"What does he even see in her?" Sakura grumbled a few weeks later.

Naruto had dragged a small group of friends to a traveling carnival.

"I mean, is she kissing him or eating his face?" She inquired.

Ino cocked her head to the side. "I can't tell."

Sasuke snorted. For once, he found something they could all agree on.

She wasn't all that bright. She certainly wasn't cute. And kissing her looked like an exercise in repulsion.

"She probably puts out." Ino suggested.

"You _know_ she does." Sakura agreed.

"You don't like her either, huh, Sasuke?" The blonde woman leaned against his shoulder.

Sasuke grunted.

"That means no." Sakura interpreted.

"So, _is_ he getting lucky?" Ino prodded.

Sasuke shrugged.

But he did know. First, he'd seen a box of condoms in Naruto's bedside table. He startled backwards as though he'd been electrocuted. His mind made up excuses. _Maybe he has them just in case_. Sasuke didn't understand why he cared. It wasn't like he was exactly a virgin himself. Nothing prepared him, however, for accidentally walking in on them going at it. He stood in the doorway for several seconds hypnotised, unable to tear his eyes away from the undulating muscles in lower Naruto's back. Feeling ill, he'd backed quietly into the bathroom.

He returned several minutes later to find them sitting on Naruto's bed playing video games, pretending that nothing had happened. The bright grin Naruto gave him when he walked in the door only made it worse.

Rationally, he knew it was perfectly normal for sixteen year old boys to be sexually active. Naruto wasn't a little kid anymore. He wasn't that child who turned red if you even mentioned the word boob. But it made Sasuke angry. Naruto wasn't supposed to grow up. He was supposed to stay innocent and sweet. He missed the childhood version of his best friend – if he was still allowed to call him that. And just maybe, he missed the childhood version of himself.

"Maybe she's the only one who likes him?" Ino mused.

Sakura shook her head. "There's this girl in my government class who is _totally_ into him. And she's smart _and_ super sweet. Why doesn't he go out with a girl like that?"

Ino shrugged.

"At least she wouldn't lick his eyeballs." Sakura huffed.

"She probably wouldn't lick his _other_ balls, either," Ino noted. "And I think we're back to square one."

"Eww!" Sakura shrieked, and Sasuke couldn't help but chuckle.

The two made minor headway as the weather turned colder. Sasuke didn't talk much, but he was always there. Naruto seemed to understand that he was trying, and the boy's mindless dribble started to gain the occasional substance.

"Are you and Sakura going out?" Naruto asked one evening, chewing on the end of his pencil.

Sasuke shook his head. "No."

They'd had sex on this very bed not two hours earlier, but Naruto didn't need to know that. They weren't 'going out,' they were screwing around. There was a difference.

Naruto nearly bit off a chunk of his eraser.

"She really likes you." He pouted, finally. "It's not fair. She totally friend-zoned me."

Sasuke shrugged. He didn't meet Naruto's eyes.

"I was playing the slow game." Naruto explained. "She didn't like anyone else. I thought it was only a matter of time until she'd change her mind and let me take her out."

Naruto huffed. "Then you come back and she's only got eyes for you."

The boy's glare was harmless, but Sasuke couldn't help but feel a little guilty.

"Sorry." He muttered.

"It's not your fault. It's not like you can change her feelings any more than I can." Naruto gave him a sad, dopey smile. "I just wish she'd give me a chance."

"Why would you settle for someone who doesn't like you?" Sasuke asked. "You deserve better than that."

Naruto's lopsided smile turned megawatt.

"Thanks, S'uke."

It was roughly two and a half months after Sasuke's return from Japan that the Uchiha decided he'd finally had enough of Naruto jerking him around. The blond in question was supposed to meet Sasuke and Sakura to work on a community engagement project the three had volunteered to complete together – well Naruto had volunteered them. The boy had seemed so stoked about it the previous day, but now he'd called Sakura after basketball practice and claimed he wasn't feeling up to participating today.

"Yeah right. He never gets sick." Sasuke muttered. "He's probably fucking his girlfriend."

Sakura flopped back on her bed.

"I don't know. I don't think he's ever lied to me." She mumbled. "Plus, he sounded super shitty on the phone.

"We can show up and check on him." Sasuke suggested.

He tried to keep the nasty smirk from his face. If the idiot wasn't at home, he'd get in deep shit with Iruka. That would teach him to lie to his friends.

"We can even bring him soup." He continued.

"That's an awesome idea!" Sakura agreed, bouncing herself off the bed. "Naruto will love it!"

Sasuke grabbed her wrist, his eyes smouldering. "Although I think he can wait a few more minutes."

If Naruto was fucking around, why couldn't he?

The two arrived at Iruka's door brandishing a can of soup with a bow on top. The man opened the door, visibly surprised.

Sasuke smirked.

"Oh, I thought Naruto called to let you know he couldn't make it." The man began.

A pulse of nausea worked it's way up from Sasuke's belly.

"We were worried." Sakura began. "Sasuke even brought soup."

She nudged him in the shoulder.

Iruka's face seemed to melt.

"Aren't you guys sweet." He gushed. "He's in the living room."

The man stepped aside.

"I'm really glad you came." He added. "I don't want to leave him alone. Gaara can't come until morning."

_Gaara_?

Sasuke heard Sakura's breath catch in her throat. She pushed past Iruka with Sasuke on her heels.

Naruto sat crumpled up on the couch, staring at the blank television. The creaking floor boards caught the boy's attention, and he turned, dull and puffy-eyed.

He'd been crying.

Sasuke felt his own heart breaking.

He didn't have to think. It took Sasuke a total of two steps to cross the room and fold Naruto into his arms, the very same way they'd comforted each other as children.

"Idiot." He chided. "What happened?"

Naruto scrubbed at his face.

"It's stupid." He mumbled. "I broke up with Sasame."

Sasuke tutted.

"I mean it's OK." He continued. "It's just bad timing... It's..."

Naruto hung his head.

"It's Jiraiya." Sakura finished. "It's this weekend, isn't it?"

Naruto didn't speak.

The anniversary of his death? His birthday, maybe? He pulled Naruto tighter against his chest.

"How about I exchange this noodle soup for some ice cream?" Sakura suggested. "Is mint OK?"

Sasuke didn't miss the frown Sakura threw over her shoulder as she disappeared into the kitchen.

"I caught her cheating." Naruto muttered, digging at his fingernails. "It's humiliating."

Sasuke hummed, just to let the idiot know he was listening.

"I didn't like her the way I like Sakura." The boy explained in a low voice. "I know that wasn't fair to her. But it was just nice to be loved for a while."

And there Sasuke was, having sex with the girl of his best friend's dreams, while he cried alone at home. Good one Uchiha. Way to be an awesome friend!

"You should have told us, dumbass." Sasuke mumbled into Naruto's shoulder, guilt nibbling at his chest.

Naruto heaved a tired sigh. "I just wanted to be alone."

"You mean you wanted to sulk and drown in your own self-pity?" Sasuke suggested.

"Whatever." Naruto pouted. "You do that every day."

Sasuke rested his chin on Naruto's shoulder. That was true.

"I don't like being around people when I'm gloomy." Naruto muttered.

Sasuke was pretty self-involved, even for a teenager. Despite that he understood Naruto's insecurity. He'd always been made fun of for being a crybaby. He didn't want people to see him with his impossibly cheerful mask slipping.

"Besides, I didn't want to interrupt." The boy continued after a pause.

"Interrupt what?"

"I know you and Sakura are seeing each other. You guys don't get much time together. Who needs me depressing everyone?"

Sasuke blinked. He'd been more careful since their conversation some weeks earlier.

"We're not seeing each other."

"You don't have to lie to me." Naruto's voice was annoyed. "You smell like her."

"I was at her house." Sasuke protested.

He could hear a noise of disbelief lodged in Naruto's throat.

"We're not." The boy repeated.

It was only half a lie, but it sat bitter on his tongue.

"You can do better." Sasuke huffed. "You can do better than Sasame _and _Sakura."

Naruto hummed and pulled his face into his knees.

"It just made me think – about Jiraiya, about everyone." The boy drew a laboured breath. "Everyone always leaves me in the end."

Naruto attempted to shrug away, but Sasuke held tight. He could feel Naruto's body shuddering as he tried to silence his sobs.

_Selfish_. Sasuke thought. _As usual._ Expecting Naruto to fix everything. The other boy was trying so hard to move on. But he couldn't. They couldn't just pretend the last years hadn't happened, that the trust between them hadn't shattered. And Sasuke was doing a splendid job of putting it back together.

"I'm trying." Sasuke whispered.

He spoke in Japanese, the secret language of their childhood.

"I'm not a good person. And I don't understand why you want me around."

Naruto shifted in his arms, meeting his gaze with watery blue eyes. They hadn't spoken much Japanese since Sasuke's return, always surrounded by Naruto's friends.

"I can't change what I've done. I'm a fuck up. And I'm probably going to fuck up again."

Naruto opened his mouth to speak.

"But I want to be better for you." Sasuke interrupted. "I'm not good at this, but I'm trying. For you."

Sasuke could feel Sakura looming in the background, but he paid her no mind, even as Naruto flung himself into Sasuke's chest. One of these days, the teen figured, all of his efforts wouldn't be enough. Sooner or later, Naruto would be the one to leave him.

He lifted his eyes to Sakura's, noting the reeking jealousy before she forced a smile and joined them with three dishes of ice cream.

"She looked like a bad kisser, anyway." Sasuke muttered.

"Oh god." Naruto snorted. "It was awful."

"Tch. _Dobe_."

* * *

><p>Uchiha Sasuke suffered from night terrors. They weren't such an unusual phenomena following trauma, after all, and Sasuke had more reason than most to suffer post traumatic stress. Though the terrors had slackened in recent years, he still woke up panting sometimes, chased by the blurry faces of friends and foes long dead, through an unfamiliar tangle of streets and alleyways. The dreams didn't make much sense. They followed no timeline nor rhythm. There wasn't even a narrative, just an overarching sensation of fear, panic, a never-ending chase from which he could not awaken. Then sometimes, a real memory would surface, and Sasuke would find himself staring into the shocked, dead eyes of his mother.<p>

That was why, on afternoons such as this, when he was startled awake from a perfectly innocuous dream about a hotel swimming pool, he became particularly cranky.

It took Sasuke several moments to gather his wits, trying to discern what it was that had awakened him up in the first place. Toccata and Fugue blared anew from his desk, and a blasphemy of the highest offense slipped from between his lips.

He groaned and slid his finger along the bottom of his phone.

"What." He demanded.

"Good afternoon to you, too." His brother drawled. "Did you really just get up?"

"Napping." Sasuke explained, suppressing a yawn. "What do you want?"

"Are you free this week?" Itachi asked. "Maybe Wednesday or Thursday?"

Sasuke sat up on his elbow.

"Thursday I have to give a make-up lecture, but Wednesday is fine. What's up?" A trace of concern laced into his yawn.

"I… well…" Itachi cleared his throat. "I have someone I'd like you to meet."

Sasuke felt the corners of his mouth twitching upwards. He hummed in mock-disbelief.

"Oh really?"

"Yes, really." Itachi pressed. "And I'd like you to bring a date, as well."

"Yeah right." Sasuke's tone was flat.

"I'm serious." Itachi urged. "Otherwise it will just be the three of us, and that will be awkward."

Naruto chose that very moment to slink down the hallway with an unopened bag of crisps.

"Hey dumbass." Sasuke called.

One blond head poked in the door.

"Do you want to meet Itachi's girlfriend?"

"Itachi has a girlfriend?" The man inquired.

Sasuke shrugged. "Apparently."

"I knew it!" He hissed.

He dove onto the bed next to his flatmate, cursing when a vicious pair of claws tightened into his calf. Leaning on his elbows, Naruto seized the phone and switched it to speaker.

"So..." He drawled. "When do I get to meet her?"

A dark chuckle echoed through the phone.

"Wednesday, apparently." Itachi answered. "Assuming you're the other half of the double-date I requested from my little brother."

Sasuke could feel his cheeks heating.

His flatmate just laughed and nudged Sasuke in the ribs.

The boys heard a suffering sigh on the other end of the line.

"I was hoping I'd get a better reaction than that." Itachi mumbled.

"_Nii-chan_," Naruto chirped. "If you want to embarrass us with gay jokes, you're about a decade and a half late. You're going to have to do a lot better than that."

"Hm." Sasuke could almost hear his brother thinking. "I'm certain I can."

"How about no." Sasuke grumped.

"Well what if I told you that my precious little brother is madly..."

"That's enough!" Sasuke interrupted, snatching back his phone, and fumbling for the speaker.

"...incapable of expressing his emotions." Itachi finished.

Sasuke ground his teeth.

"What time?" He prompted.

"About seven. I'll make reservations."

"Fine."

"And _ototou_?"

"What?" Sasuke demanded.

"Make sure you tell him someday."

"Go die in a fire."

He hung up the phone before his brother could respond.

"I'm your date, huh?" Naruto teased in a low murmur. "Hot."

"Yeah." Sasuke breathed.

Naruto was idly chewing on his lip in such a way that let Sasuke know he was feeling a little insecure. He looked... curious. His eyes were smiling softly, dancing back and forth between Sasuke's, but he seemed open. It made it appear younger again, and oddly vulnerable.

Sasuke sighed. "Despite what I say when I'm pissed off, you _are_ family. And I wouldn't want to meet Itachi's girlfriend with anyone else. So... I'd like you to come with me. If you want to, that is."

Sasuke was rambling and it was as uncomfortable as it was unusual. Naruto seemed to be enjoying it, however, if his blooming smile was any indication.

"So... do you?" Sasuke finished with a lame lilt.

"Yeah." Naruto repeated in timbre and tone, letting his lip slide from his teeth.

Sasuke traced the flesh with his eyes, pulling himself back with a startled wince. He sat up and stretched before he did something truly foolish like up and kiss his flatmate here in the middle of the afternoon.

"Hn." He offered in a cryptic reply. It was more in character anyway. It was no wonder he avoided using words.

* * *

><p>The bus downtown that evening was crowded and stuffy, clogged with the flocks of students migrating to nightlife away from campus. Sasuke found his nose wedged into Naruto's throat. He always liked the smell of his flatmate's aftershave. It was the right balance of spicy and zesty lime, and it counteracted the sting of chlorine that inevitably clung to Naruto's skin. They were pressed tightly together, Sasuke's toes between Naruto's and fingers brushing against the handle above their heads. Despite the sticky discomfort, Sasuke was glad his coat was heavy so Naruto couldn't feel his racing heart against his chest. He forced himself to focus on an abandoned wad of gum that was stuck to the window.<p>

"Hey, Mr. Uchiha? Sasuke?" Called an unfamiliar female voice above the bustle. "Is that you?"

The pair turned to find an attractive young woman with clever eyes.

"Koyuki." Sasuke acknowledged. "She's in my macro lecture."

"Naruto Uzumaki." The other man introduced. "It's a pleasure."

The woman's fair eyes turned a bit doey, and Sasuke had to repress the urge to snarl at his student. The bus lurched suddenly and Sasuke stumbled back against his flatmate. He felt Naruto's right hand steadying his hips, keeping him firmly against his chest.

"Going out tonight I presume?" She promted.

Naruto nodded and rambled off the name of the bar, but Sasuke could only focus on the vibration of his voice against his ear. The hand on his hips shifted as the bus swayed, Naruto's fingers pressing into the fabric for a tighter grip, and Sasuke found it difficult to breathe. Naruto leaned forward slightly to speak with Koyuki, and Sasuke could almost feel the mans lips moving against his temple. He nearly shuddered.

The other man paused mid-sentence and turned his nose to the crown of Sasuke's head and made a dramatic sniff.

"Idiot, what are you doing?"

Sasuke attempted to duck away from the prying nose.

"You smell weird." Naruto declared.

He squeezed Sasuke closer and took another exaggerated whiff.

"Quit sniffing me!" He demanded.

"Whatever, you were do it to me earlier!" Naruto whined.

"Was not!" Sasuke protested.

He winced at the petulant tone he used as it slipped form his lips. He could see the amusement at his childish outburst in his student's expression, even if she kept her laughter politely pinched.

"Did you use my shampoo?" Naruto asked.

Blush rising, Sasuke shifted in Naruto's grip.

"I ran out." He defended, crossing his arms tightly against his chest.

He made the mistake of catching Koyuki's eye, and her indulgent expression only worsened the rush of blood to his face.

Naruto sighed and rested his chin against his flatmate's heated cheekbone.

"I like the way yours smells." His tone was pouty.

"I still used my own conditioner." Sasuke huffed. "It's not that different."

"Yeah, but..." Naruto smelled his hair again.

"Quit it!" Sasuke snapped.

"It just isn't right." Naruto protested.

Sasuke turned just in time to see Naruto throw Koyuki a teasing smile.

"You're playing with me." He deadpanned.

Naruto grinned.

"He's fun to mess with." The blond beamed at his student.

The bus screeched to a sudden stop, and Naruto's arm snaked all the way around him to prevent him from toppling over. He found his hands fisting his flatmate's coat, and his lips pressed to Naruto's jugular. He pressed a breath out slowly, noticing that Naruto's pulse was racing against his lips.

Unexpected.

Naruto recovered quickly. "Well, this is our stop." He chirped. "It was nice to meet you, Koyuki."

"The pleasure was all mine." She purred.

Sasuke nodded his own fairwell.

Naruto could be difficult to read at times, despite his outwardly open persona. It wasn't always as simple as it seemed to tell when his best friend's smiles were candid or forced, when his actions and emotions were genuine or when he was teasing – or worse, when he was being purposefully evasive. It had taken Sasuke the better part of two decades to learn to look for cues that were difficult to fake.

Naruto's hands strayed back to his hips, and he felt the man guide him into the swell of other exiting passengers. His thumbs pressed against the small of his back, strong so it couldn't be accidental, but gentle enough to be _intimate_.

It was only now that Sasuke realised how adept Naruto was at manipulation. He didn't figure many people even knew they'd been had. It was a good thing Naruto was an irritatingly good person. Otherwise, he'd have a list of broken hearts in his pocket longer than Sasuke's.

Sasuke stepped forward when they exited the bus, and Naruto's hands dropped from his back. He shivered, ignoring his flatmate's worried frown.

"It's not far." The man promised.

Sasuke caught Koyuki's amused eyes as the bus careened away with a startling hiss.

"Do you enjoy harassing me in front of my students." Sasuke tutted.

Naruto gave him a sheepish grin.

"You looked uncomfortable. I figured if you were pissed off at me, you'd relax."

Sasuke pinned him with a potent glare.

"Well, it worked didn't it?"

Naruto's knuckles brushed the back of his as they walked, and Sasuke had to bite his lip to keep from shivering each time. The touch was so light, it could have been an accident. However, as far as he could remember, Naruto had never _accidentally_ almost held his hand. Besides, the brushes lingered just an instant too long to be anything but intentional. Naruto was baiting him, and it was _on purpose_.

Sasuke's heart made a strange fluttering movement. He couldn't deny the itch in his fingers to link their hands.

_Make them come to you. Otherwise, it's creepy_.

Sasuke suspected Naruto had known that all along. Only where Sasuke searched for sex, Naruto had been courting intimacy. If Sasuke had been someone else, he'd be a puddle in Naruto's hands. As it was, he was halfway there already. The blond was luring him in.

Incidentally, if it were anyone besides Naruto giving him this faintly gooey sensation shooting in all directions from his stomach, they'd be fucking in the toilets in less than half an hour.

Sasuke had watched his best friend flirt over the years, and he was so good at it, it was downright vexing. The man had a talent for reading people, so he usually knew what buttons to push, and when to back off. He was adorable and nonthreatening, and it usually made Sasuke feel nauseous.

_Manipulative little shit._

Sasuke stalked forward slightly, if only to avoid the irregular jolts that shot up all the way up his arm every time Naruto touched him. He shivered again.

So, Naruto was flirting with him. Sasuke's heart did that strange fluttering thing again. He didn't mind the flirting so much as he wanted to know why. He supposed their interactions had held a flirty edge for years now. Naruto was always pushing, teasing – and he teased back. Yet, that pounding beat in his throat suggested that Naruto _wanted_ him, and that was the most terrifying thing of all.

Naruto always got what he wanted. _Always_.

A choke of panic rose to Sasuke's throat. He pressed his breath outward. This couldn't happen here. It didn't make any sense, anyway. He'd wanted Naruto so long that the dull ache in his chest had become his status quo. This terror was unnecessary.

He felt warm fingers encircling his wrist.

"We're here." Naruto chirped with a gentle tug to his hand. "You almost walked past it."

Sasuke blinked himself out of his daze. They stood in front of an old firehouse. One of the large doors to the warehouse stood open, and a short queue snaked onto the sidewalk.

"Are you OK?" Naruto murmured. "You look like you don't feel well."

The man paused and took a step closer and Sasuke inhaled on instinct.

"If you want to go home..."

"I'm fine." Sasuke interrupted. "Just get in the queue."

A pair of concerned blue eyes traced his face. His lips parted with apparent comprehension and a small line creased between his eyes. Naruto's hand slipped from his wrist.

It was purely by instinct that he caught Naruto's fingers as they dropped. Sasuke's face was practically steaming in the winter chill. The grip was awkward – he only had hold on two of his flatmate's fingers – so it could hardly count as holding hands. At least that's what Sasuke rationalised.

Nevertheless, Naruto sent him a cocky grin, looking downright pleased as he gave Sasuke's fingers a soft squeeze.

Those girls were right. His confidence _was_ sexy.

Sasuke found his breathing laboured again, dizzying emotions were storming his door. His intestines twitched, and he couldn't quite decide if he needed to be sick.

Naruto pulled him into the queue. When he had to let go to fish out his ID out of his wallet, Sasuke was more disappointed than relieved. His hand had been warm and tingly, and he didn't think he had the stomach to make another grab for him.

"Hello, Naruto." A disturbingly large bouncer greeted, skipping the blond's ID for Sasuke's. "Did you guys dress up?"

Naruto nodded vigorously.

"Turns out we don't have many clothes in common though." He muttered.

"Cocktails are two for one." The big man chuckled and handed Naruto two plastic bracelets. "Have a nice night, boys."

The two story garage had been converted into a large dance floor, and the bass boomed off of the concrete walls. The mist machine hissed, and blurry bodies swayed to the heavy beat. Inside the darkened firehouse was similarly crowded. Sasuke scanned the room for two open seats.

"It's quieter upstairs." Naruto whispered in his ear, nudging him towards a staircase that was all but hidden in the back corner.

It was also cozier upstairs, Sasuke noted. The tables were replaced with couches and booths, and the low hung lighting gave off a warm, yellow hue. It _was_ quieter, though the bass from the dance floor still vibrated the walls, and there were relatively few people up here. Naruto selected a table tucked in a corner, depositing his coat on the cushy bench.

When Naruto told Sasuke it was "besties night" at one of his favourite bars, he'd assumed the majority of the patrons would be women. From what he'd seen downstairs, it really seemed to be a mixed crowd. He masked his surprise and tossed his coat on top of Naruto's, while the other man sauntered up to the small bar in the middle of the room. Sasuke admired his form as he went. Under the premise of finding matching clothes, he had managed to haggle Naruto into a pair of extremely tight pants. If Sasuke had to be uncomfortable, at least he could enjoy the view.

An extraordinarily thin bartender with messy brown hair greeted the duo.

"Naruto!" The man offered an exaggerated wave.

"It's been a long time! Are you here with your bestie?" He drawled.

"Absolutely!" Naruto leaned on the bar with his elbow. "This is Sasuke."

"Oh my!" The bartender leaned forward as well. "He _is_ divine."

"Hey, back off!" Naruto defended with mock offense, swatting blindly. "I just got him here. Don't scare him off already."

The bartender chuckled and clicked his tongue.

"What can I make you?"

"How about an old fashioned?" Naruto suggested.

"You and your whiskey." The bartender tutted, reaching for a bottle.

"I like my liquor where I can see it." The blond shrugged.

"Do you want your second one now, or do you want to come back?"

Sasuke shrugged at Naruto's questioning gaze.

"Old fashioned is fine." He reached for his wallet.

"You get the next one." Naruto flipped some bills on the counter. "Your pick."

As Naruto pulled him back to their table, Sasuke's eyes strayed to a metal grate that covered the fireman's pole to the floor below.

"You used to be able to slide down that," Naruto explained. "But last year some drunk idiot broke his leg. Now they just use it on the dance floor."

Sasuke snorted and slipped into the booth. His flatmate followed him, sitting just around the corner. One of the blond's knees rested between his and Sasuke suddenly had the need to finish his drink as quickly as possible.

"_Kampai_" Naruto whispered. _Cheers_.

Sasuke hummed, clinking their glasses together. It has been a long time since they'd spoken much Japanese, falling out of the habit over the years. The language had always created an exclusive bubble around the two, and Sasuke suspected that was Naruto's intention. Well, two could play that game. It was Sasuke's language after all. He wondered if the blond could keep up.

Naruto's chatter was familiar and warm, and Sasuke found himself leaning forward the more they spoke. He wasn't sure he had ever been so _aware _of Naruto. He felt every shift of his body, each rustle of fabric sending a pleasant warmth to his toes. Their feet tangled under the table, knees together. The warm pressure of one long leg against his calf kept Sasuke's lips parted with his shallow breath.

The man's Japanese might not have been as fluid as it once was – he had to pause and roll the words over in his mouth now and then – but he had obviously been keeping it up. If Sasuke's stomach felt warm the moment he imagined Naruto studying his language by himself, it was coincidence. It was the whiskey dilating his capillaries. Speaking of which, he needed a new drink.

He pushed his way out of the booth, his hand lingering on Naruto's shoulder.

"Stay." He murmured. "I know you like your liquor brown."

He flagged down the familiar bartender.

"Scotch." He ordered.

"And soda? On the rocks?" The man proposed.

"That depends on the scotch." Sasuke arched his eyebrow.

The brunette sent him a pleased smile. "I've got a good one for you."

Sasuke took advantage of the his momentary pause to scan the bar. He'd been so embarrassingly immersed in his conversation with Naruto, he hadn't noticed the floor filling up. He shot a disgusted snarl to a man with greasy hair that leered at him from the other side of the bar. Two other men approached the bar hand in hand. Sasuke's eyes flew open as he looked around. OK, that was a straight couple on the couch, and he honestly couldn't tell one way or the other about that group of women over there... but those were definitely two women making out. Probably two women. Maybe.

"Here you go, love." The man lilted. "Single malt, aged in rum casks. It has a nice, smooth, vanilla finish for your little drop of golden sun over there."

Sasuke snorted, fishing out his wallet.

"Naruto only likes it peaty when he's grumpy. I know his preferences."

He paused and gave Sasuke an appraising once over.

"Or I thought I did." He amended.

Sasuke clicked his tongue and handed over the cash.

"And Sakura?" The bartender inquired.

Sasuke scowled. "They split up."

"That's too bad." The brunette mused, his eyes flicked back to Sasuke. "But not for you."

He grinned and winked. "Go get him, tiger."

Sasuke glared, just for good measure, and stalked back to their table.

"_Dobe, _did you bring me to a _gay_ bar_?" _He hissed, pushing past his flatmate into the booth.

Naruto thew back his head in a hearty laugh.

"You don't have to sound so offended." He joked.

Naruto took a sip of his drink, savouring the smooth liquid on his tongue before he continued.

"It's not a gay bar, per se." He assured his friend, leaning into his space. "It's just hipster enough to be LGBT friendly."

Sasuke arched one very sceptical eyebrow.

"I never really paid attention, but I think it's about half and half." Naruto paused. "Does that bother you? I never thought to ask."

It shouldn't have been surprising that Naruto was comfortable in queer spaces. He'd been to pride every year since he was six. When he was little with Jiraiya, because the old pervert like to watch lesbians make out, and afterward with his dads. He'd gone with them once in high school. Naruto had fit right in with the bright colours and jubilant atmosphere. Sasuke, on the other hand, had been too embarrassed to enjoy anything, filled with a panic that he could understand only now.

Naruto's frown indicated that must have been having the same memory.

"We can go somewhere else." He suggested. "I just came here for the free drinks."

"I'm fine." Sasuke slid back on the bench, parting his knees so Naruto's would fit between his. "The club I go to every weekend is mostly men. I was just surprised"

It left Sasuke to wonder, however, if Naruto was only comfortable flirting because they were tucked into a dim corner of a queer space. Would be be so open in public? What the hell compels a hitherto-until-now straight man to hit on his male best friend? Naruto wasn't one to think about consequences, but this was ridiculous.

By drink four, Sasuke didn't care. He had long lost all sense of personal space. The floor had grown crowded and noisy, so he had to linger just inches from Naruto's lips to hear him speak. His fingers curled into the denim above Naruto's knee He didn't miss the way those blue eyes trailed to his lips when he was listening, and Sasuke felt them curling into a satisfied smirk.

Sasuke's belly shifted with an uncomfortable twang that he had been ignoring for half an hour. With a sigh of resignation, he stood, headed for an overdue date with the urinal. In one of his smoothest moves to date, Sasuke's feet got tangled with his flatmate's. He had a single moment of clarity, in which all his dignity flashed before his eyes, before he felt himself sprawl forward.

He stood dead still between the man's legs. Naruto's nose pressed just above his navel. Sasuke felt too much like an idiot at the moment to really concentrate on the fact that his flatmate had a solid grip on his ass. That was, until a pair of blue eyes turned upwards to his, darkened and brimming with an undeniable lust.

Sasuke scrambled back, nearly tripping himself again in his haste.

_Real sexy, Uchiha._

The moment was broken, and Sasuke found he could breathe again. Flirty or not, Sasuke somehow doubted Naruto would enjoy having another man's dick pressed against his chest. Plus, it was damn near impossible to take a piss with a boner.

Naruto's eyes were alight with laughter.

"Easy there." He chuckled. "Since when are you the clumsy one?"

Sasuke sent him a particularly withering glare.

"Where's the bathroom, _dobe_?" He demanded.

"It's downstairs, around the corner from the bar." Naruto explained.

Sasuke racked his brain to recall the layout of the floor below.

"Here, I'll show you." Naruto stood. "You can see it from the stairs."

The man gently tugged on Sasuke's belt loop with one fingertip. He could feel the pressure through the fabric against his hipbone, and a spike of euphoria went barreling through his veins. Naruto let go as they reached the stairs, and stopped so suddenly Sasuke's forehead bumped into the base of his skull.

"Holy shit." Naruto drawled, articulating each syllable.

Sasuke peeked around Naruto's shoulder and that good feeling evaporated. Sakura was pressed against the staircase wall in the arms of an unfamiliar man, her mouth gaping in a horrified O.

"Oh my god!" She whispered. "I didn't mean to..."

Naruto rubbed his eyes. "I did not want to see that."

Sasuke scoffed, scowling at the offending couple.

The man, for his part, looked partially confused, and partially terrified.

"Oh don't be a dick, S'uke." Naruto tutted, turning on the stairs. "She can do what she wants."

The Uchiha turned his glare to Naruto – why was he _always_ defending her – but the man's smile only grew indulgent.

"I'm really sorry!" Sakura was still stammering apologies.

"It's fine, Sakura." Naruto dismissed with a frown. "I claim upstairs, you stay down?"

She nodded with watery eyes.

"Which sucks," Naruto muttered in Japanese. "Because I was about to drag you downstairs to dance."

He threw a pout in Sasuke's direction.

"Who says I want to dance with you?" He bit.

"The operative word there was drag, _teme_." _You bastard._

Sasuke crossed his arms, completely put off by the situation. His flatmate just sighed and pulled him down a few steps by his elbow.

"The bathroom is just there." Switching back to English, he pointed to a doorway hidden in a corner. "I'll wait for you upstairs."

The man gave Sasuke's hair a playful ruffle as he descended the staircase, receiving a sharp elbow in return.

In the bathroom, Sasuke splashed a hand full of water against his face to cool down whatever the hell it was he was feeling right now. His spine was shaking somewhere between anger, disappointment, and a lingering excitement that he knew he needed to murder.

That man upstairs had broken up with his girlfriend some forty-eight hours prior. There was no way he was ready for this shit. He was lonely. He was needy. And he was playing around.

Sasuke felt a cold twisting down to his belly. But the desire painted in his dark blue eyes had been genuine, palpable in the sour air.

_Don't be stupid._

Another splash of water hit, and he scrubbed furiously at his face.

_He's drunk._

Naruto wasn't a bad guy. If he knew how deeply Sasuke felt, he wouldn't act like this. And because he didn't know, and he sure as hell wasn't going to find out, it was up to Sasuke to set his own boundaries.

The blond was just finishing a shot at the bar when he crested the stairs. He stood amidst a handful of people Sasuke had never seen. If Sasuke knew his flatmate well enough, he could safely assume Naruto had never seen them either.

Sasuke steeled his heart, wrapping himself in the bitter disappointment of reality. However, the way Naruto's face lit up when he approached the bar didn't help his conviction.

"Hey asshole!" He slurred with a warm, dopey smile. "What took so long?"

"Get your coat, idiot. We're going home."

"We are?" Naruto stood and swayed slightly on his feet. "Are you OK?"

"I am, but you're drunk." Sasuke retorted.

"That was kind of the point." He whined, but he followed his flatmate regardless.

The night's wind bit Sasuke's face, and he burrowed into his now bar-scented coat.

Naruto leaned heavily on Sasuke's side, and he could feel the man's fevered forehead against his chin.

"Holy shit, I _am_ drunk." He whined, his lips brushing against Sasuke's jugular. "When did that happen?"

Sasuke shrugged himself out of Naruto's grip.

"Can't you walk on your own, dumbass?" He snapped.

Sasuke heard the man suck in a surprised breath, and he took two hasty steps forward, unwilling to see the hurt confusion he knew would be painted in his flatmate's eyes. Though Naruto trudged along beside him, he didn't initiate any further attempts to touch him, not even the slightest brush of a shoulder. Sasuke could feel the space between them. It felt unnatural and heavy, and Sasuke had to remind himself that this was the way it was _supposed_ to be.

Naruto moaned in delight as he approached the bus stop, flinging himself onto the bench with all the grace of an intoxicated hippopotamus.

"Holy fuck, I drank too much." He mumbled, propping himself up against the glass. "Those shots were _not_ a good idea."

If Naruto was aware that his childhood friend was glaring at him some bloody murder, he made no indication.

A shrill honk startled both men.

"Hey boys!"

It was Suigetsu of all people, Sasuke noted with distaste, leaning halfway out of the passenger's seat of Karin's car.

"Need a ride to the club?" He called.

Sasuke shook his head.

"Come on! Saturday's the best night." Karin whined over her boyfriend. "And we have space for two!"

The brunette could see Juugo wearing a stormy expression through the glass in the backseat. He winced.

"I need to get the idiot home." His response was dry and annoyed.

Besides, there was no way on this side of the seven hells that Sasuke would let Naruto get anywhere near that club.

"I'm drunk, but not so drunk I can't get myself home." Naruto mumbled, eyes trained downward. "If you want to go, just go."

The man scraped his toe against a soggy brown leaf on the sidewalk.

"Maybe next week." Sasuke ignored him.

He waved his friends off, just as the bus evicted them from the stop.

Naruto didn't wait for Sasuke to stand to wobble onto the near-empty bus. He sat in the corner of the seat, regarding Sasuke with startlingly clear eyes, despite his intoxication.

"What happened?" He murmured. "What did I do?"

"Nothing happened." Sasuke let his brow furrow.

Naruto lifted his hand as if to brush the other man's bangs from his face, but paused and let it drop back to his lap.

"I want you to kiss me." The blond admitted without an ounce of embarrassment.

Sasuke blinked. Straightforward as always, Naruto.

"I know."

Naruto frowned.

"Then why won't you?"

It wasn't a demand, just an honest question.

"You're drunk, _dobe_." Sasuke sighed. "You probably won't even remember this conversation in the morning."

"Then there's no risk in answering honestly." His flatmate quipped.

Sasuke pressed his forhead into the seat in front of them.

"I'm not your rebound snuggle bunny." He responded at last.

"Well, you're not."

Sasuke pressed a sharp breath out of his lungs.

"You're drunk." He explained.

"Is that all?"

"And you're not supposed to kiss someone when you're thinking about someone else."

"Are you thinking about someone else, S'uke?"

Sasuke raised his head so quickly the bus seemed to spin.

"_You _are."

"I..." Naruto began. "Well I _wasn't_."

Sasuke clicked his tongue.

Naruto closed his eyes and for a moment Sasuke thought he had fallen asleep despite the constant jostling of the bus.

"Do you?"

A sound of confusion worked its way from the back of Sasuke's throat.

"Do you ever think about someone besides the person you're kissing?"

Sasuke bit his lip.

"Every time." He whispered, hoping Naruto wouldn't hear him.

Sasuke called their stop and the bus came to a screaming halt. They exited in silence, the Uchiha noting with some dismay that Naruto seemed to be walking considerably straighter. Apparently his stupid-fast metabolism extended to alcohol. Life could be so unfair.

"Thanks for staying with me." Naruto's rough voice broke the still night air.

"I promised, didn't I?" Sasuke's lips pulled into a half-smirk. "Not to ditch you for some dude."

Naruto shrugged. "I wouldn't have blamed you."

Sasuke frowned. Again, typical Naruto, shouldering the blame for someone else's problems. And the idiot didn't even know what he had done wrong. It's not like the blond had showed him a bad time. The man was practically fun incarnate. It was his own twisting emotions that ruined his night.

He kicked the underside of his flatmate's shoe, causing the man to stumble.

"Whatever, _dojikko_." He chided with an amused lilt. _Clumsy little one._

"_Teme!_"

* * *

><p>Sasuke awoke to a clang followed string of loud curses. After some moments of swimming through his usual morning fog he determined the suspicious noise had come from the kitchen and that bit of blasphemy had been one of Naruto's favourites. His head twanged in a silent reminder of the evening prior, and he felt vaguely nauseous. Sasuke convinced himself that the twist in his stomach was merely indicative of the drop in blood sugar inevitably following a night of drinking, and had nothing to do with any lingering anxiety regarding his flatmate.<p>

Nope.

They didn't speak on the walk home, though at some point Naruto's rough shoulder sent him flying into a grungy snow bank. Sasuke might have been pissed, if in Naruto's attempt to escape his wrath, he hadn't slipped on a patch of ice and gone face first into some kid's half-melted snowman.

The idiot just laughed.

It was a truce: a silent agreement to force their relationship back into familiar territory.

Unfortunately, Naruto would want to talk it out. He could see it in the way his lips twitched right before he disappeared to brush his teeth before bed, and how his eyes crinkled at just the wrong angle. Where Sasuke liked to pretend things didn't happen, Naruto was more of the _call it out and process it_ type. 'Drop it' just wasn't part of the moron's vocabulary.

Sasuke buried his face under his pillow.

To be honest, Sasuke didn't know what to say to his roommate.

_I don't want to complicate things._ He mused. _Right now_.

Should he say right now? Was implying he might not mind the complication in the future admitting too much? And just exactly how long would it take Naruto to get over that damn woman, anyway?

Sasuke groaned. There was a reason he never got into emotional attachment. It was too fucking complicated.

Well, whatever was going to happen, Sasuke sure as hell wasn't going to get into it today. He was going to sulk in his room until Naruto disappeared. Then, he was going to go to the library and accomplish something important.

Sasuke waited exactly five minutes to creep out of his bedroom after he heard Naruto's bedroom door click shut. He crept on tippy-toes to the kitchen, avoiding that one squeaky floorboard with the grace of a ninja.

The scent of coffee accosted him in the doorway, and he couldn't help the smile of relief that assaulted his face when he saw that Naruto had left him half a pot. A bright orange post-it was stuck to the handle.

_Asshole,_

_ Check the microwave. It's not poisonous. _

_ Probably._

Sasuke rolled his eyes and pulled out a plate of scrambled eggs and overcooked bacon.

A peace offering most likely. The eggs were mediocre, but he'd have to think about thanking the idiot later.

Just as Sasuke finished putting the dishes in the dishwasher, a knock interrupted the sleepy morning silence.

He wrenched open the door, startled to meet a pair of murderous green eyes.

"Good morning, Uchiha." The redhead drawled.

Sasuke narrowed his eyes.

"Sabaku."

* * *

><p><strong>AN<strong>: Well what's a little bit of jealousy to get things moving. In fiction, that is.

Stay tuned for the next instalment in which, for fuck's sake, Sasuke is smug, Naruto just does what he wants, and Juugo pays Sasuke a little visit.

It won't take six months to update, I swear. :)


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